Tartan

Tartan (pronounced tahr-tn)

(1) A wool or worsted cloth woven with stripes of different colours and widths crossing at right angles, worn chiefly by the Scottish Highlanders, many clans now having its own distinctive design.

(2) A design now often identified by the name of the clan wearing it and most associated with the kilt.

(3) A generalized descriptor for any similar (sometimes called plaid) design.

(4) A single-masted vessel used in the Mediterranean, usually with a lateen sail (also spelled as tartane).

(5) The trade name of a synthetic resin, used for surfacing tracks etc.

1490-1500: Of uncertain origin, apparently a blend of the Middle English tartaryn (rich material) from the Middle French tartarin (Tartar cloth) and the Middle French tiretaine (strong coarse fabric; linsey-woolsey; cloth of mixed fibers) from the Old French tiret (kind of cloth), from tire (oriental cloth of silk) (and as the French tartane from the Italian tartana, of uncertain origin) from the Medieval Latin tyrius (material from Tyre), from the Classical Latin Tyrus (Tyre).  The origin of the name as applied to the small ship most associated with the Mediterranean, dates from seventeenth century French, probably the Provençal tartana (falcon, buzzard), it being common practice in the era to name ships after birds.  As an adjective meaning "design with a pattern of bars or stripes of color crossing one another at right angles", use began circa 1600.  The etymology of the fabric is certainly murky.  Most agree about the influence of the Old French tertaine but some trace the origin of that not to Latin via Italian but rather the Old Spanish tiritaña (a fine silk fabric) from tiritar (to rustle).  The spelling of tartan must have been influenced in Middle English by tartaryn from the Old French tartarin from Tartare (“Tartar," the people of Central Asia).  Tartan & tartanization are nouns, tartanize & tartaning are verbs and tartaned is a verb & adjective; the noun plural is tartans.

Lindsay Lohan in Royal Stewart tartan, Freaky Friday (Walt Disney Pictures, 2003), costume test photo.

Despite the perception of many (encouraged by the depictions in popular culture), tartan in the sense of specific color & pattern combinations attached to specific clans is something of recent origin.  Tartan (breacan (pɾʲɛxkən) in Scots Gaelic) is a patterned cloth consisting of criss-crossed, horizontal and vertical bands in multiple colours.  The word plaid is now often used interchangeably with tartan (particularly in North America and when not associated with anything Scottish (especially kilts)), but technically (and always in Scotland), a plaid is a large piece of tartan cloth, worn as a type of kilt or large shawl although it’s also used to describe a blanket.  During the disputes between England and Scotland, the wearing of tartan became a political expression and, after the failure of the of the 1745 Jacobite rising, the UK parliament in 1746 passed the Dress Act which restricted the wearing of tartan and displays of other aspects of Gaelic culture in Scotland; it was one of a number of laws designed to suppress the warrior clans north of the border.  Perhaps inspired by this weaponization of fashion, during the Nazi occupation of France (1940-1944), the administrators of Alsace made an attempt to "ban the beret" on the grounds it was a "political symbol of Frenchness" (onion sellers curiously exempt from this crackdown) but the bizarre scheme quickly was ended by Berlin.  The Dress Act was repealed in 1782 and tartan was soon adopted as both the symbolic national dress of Scotland and in imagery more generally.  The Royal Stewart was the personal tartan of Elizabeth II (1926-2022; Queen of the UK and other places, 1952-2022) and historically associated with the royal house of Stewart (or Stuart), the dynasty which ruled Scotland from 1371, in 1903 uniting with the English crown in 1603 under James VI of Scotland (1566–1625) who thus became also James I of England and Ireland as James I.

Paired with a denim jacket, Lindsay Lohan in her screen test wore the dress in something of the way in the 1970s it became part of the punk sub-culture but for more conventional types there are also scarves, ties, sashes and such.  There was a time when the convention was it could be worn in Scotland only with the permission of the sovereign but those days are gone and it has long been a most “democratized fabric” to the point where it’s now something of a “universal tartan”, one widely seen in commercial fashion and in that sense is used in parallel with the clan affiliation.  Commonly, it’s worn to formal events such as weddings, ceilidhs, or Burns Nights (readings of the poems of Robert “Rabbie” Burns (1759–1796)), the modern trend to pair a kilt with a Prince Charlie or Argyll jacket, traditionalists adding a sporran (pouch), hose (kilt socks) & flashes, Ghillie brogues (traditional shoes) and even a Sgian dubh (a small dagger tucked in the sock) although carrying the last item may be unlawful in some jurisdictions.  Historians of the fabrics deconstruct the Royal Stewart as: (1) red background (boldness, power & visibility (thus a very “royal” color)), (2) blue & black (lines strength & dignity) and (3) white & yellow stripes (light, honor & distinction).  Remarkably, in the age of identity politics and sensitivity to cultural appropriation, the etiquette guides note there is no objection to non-Scots folk wearing their tartan of choice except when an event is clan-specific in which case only those in the lineage should don the fabric.  That said, even then, the consequence of a tartan faux pas will likely be less severe than wearing a Rangers shirt in a Glasgow pub filled with Celtic’s hoops.

Car seat covers in Clan Lindsay Tartan.  The Clan Lindsay motto is Endure Fort (Endure bravely).  Think about it.

Although there’s now an industry devoted to the tartans of the clans, the specific association of patterns with clans and families began only in the mid-nineteenth century.  This history was both technological and economic deterministic.  Unlike some fabrics, tartans were produced by local weavers for local sale, using only the natural dyes available in that geographical area and patterns were just designs chosen by the buyer.  It was only with a broader availability of synthetic dyes that many patterns were created these began (somewhat artificially) to become associated with Scottish clans, families, or institutions wishing to emphasize their Scottish heritage.  The heritage was usually real but not often specific to a particular tartan, the mid-nineteenth century interest in the fabrics a kind of manufactured nostalgia.  There are many modern tartans on sale, the color combinations and patterns of which are chosen for market appeal rather than any relationship to clan identity or any other historic link: Among the purists, these collectively are called "the clan McGarish".  The phrase "Tartan Tory" does not refer to Scottish members of the Conservative Party (a once prolific species which has for decades been listed as "threatened" and may already be functionally extinct) but to the faction of the Scottish National Party (SNP) which is associated with cultural nostalgia rather than radical nationalist politics.

1976 Porsche 914 2.0 with factory-fitted heckblende in Nepal Orange over black leatherette with orange & black plaid inserts.  All the mid-engined 914 built for public sale had a targa top although for use in competition the factory did a few with a fixed roof to gain additional rigidity.  The 914 was the first of a number of attempts by Porsche’s engineers to convince customers there were better configurations than the rear-engine layout used on the 911 & 912.  The customers continued to demand 911s and, the customer always being right, rear-engined 911s remain available to this day.

These days, a designer might, for the right design, for a certain target market use orange paint or orange & black plaid but it's unlikely they'd be seen in combination; it'd be sort of like mixing spots & stripes.  The 1970s however were different and, for better and worse, there was more adventurism on the color charts although, regrettably, polka-dot upholstery never caught on.  The last Porsche 914s (1969-1976) were sold in 1976 but because the new 924 (1976-1988) wasn’t ready for production, to create an “entry-level” model for the vital US market, the factory resurrected the 912.  The original 912 (1965-1969) was essentially a four-cylinder 911 (1964-) with less elaborate appointments and fitted with a version of the 1.6 litre flat-four used in 356 (1946-1965) but the 1976 912E used the 2.0 litre Volkswagen unit from the 914 because the older engine had never been modified to comply with the new emission control rules.  The single-season 912E was an unexpected swansong for the 912 and although some 30% cheaper than the contemporary 911S, it sold in only one fifth the volume, a telling comparison with the mid 1960s when the 912 initially out-sold the 911.  So barely more than 2,000 912Es were built and the aftermarket was for decades subdued but the survival rate was high and although the prices realized don’t match the 912s of the 1960s (let alone the six cylinder cars), the 912E is now appreciated as a practical, well-built and surprisingly economical machine so prices have been rising.

High-priced plaid

1955 Mercedes-Benz 300SL Gullwing (W198) trimmed in blue-grey plaid.  The factory option codes for the plaid were L1 Blaugrau (blue-grey), L2 Rot-Grün (red-green) & L3 Grün-Beige (green-beige).

Buyers of the Mercedes-Benz 300SL Gullwing (W198, 1954-1957) had the choice of seats covered in leather or plaid cloth.  In the years since, many Gullwings originally fitted with plaid upholstery were re-trimmed in leather during refurbishment or restoration, partly because the leather was thought to have more of a allure but also because for decades fabrics exactly matching what was available in the 1950s had become unobtainable (unobtainium thus the preferred industry term).  However, in 2018, in what was said to be a response to "demand", Daimler announced bolts replicating exactly the original three designs (L1 Blaugrau (blue-grey), L2 Rot-Grün (red-green) & L3 Grün-Beige (green-beige)) would again be available as factory part-numbers.  Manufactured to the 1955 specification using an odor-neutral wool yarn woven into a four-ply, double weave twill, it’s claimed to be a “very robust material”.  In the era, the blue-grey fabric was the most popular, fitted to 80% of 300SLs not trimmed in leather while the red-green and green-beige combinations were requested respectively only by 14 & 6% of buyers.  The price (quoted in 2018 at US$229 per yard) was indicative of the product’s niche market but for those restoring a 300 SL to its original appearance, it's a bargain.  The fabric may be ordered from the Mercedes-Benz Klassisches Zentrum (Classic Centre).

1955 Mercedes-Benz 300SL Gullwing (W198; chassis 5500428; Engine 198.980.5500455 & body 5500411 and factory-fitted with the Rudge Wheel option), refurbished by Paul Russell & Company, Essex, Massachusetts (Leder rot (red leather) 1079 (left) and non-original Rot-Weiß (red-white plaid) (right)) .  Note the strapped-down luggage in the "head-rest" position.

Now bolts of fabric replicating the construction and appearance of the originals are available, restorers are able even more closely to replicate the appearance of seven-odd decades ago.  With chassis 5500428, Paul Russell & Company re-painted and re-trimmed to the original factory specifications (Graphitgrau (Graphite Grey) DB190 over Leder rot (red leather) 1079) but also included an interchangeable set of seat cushions and squabs in a non-original red-white plaid.  Additionally, the company fabricated a reproduction of the matching luggage set and while restorers have long been able, at a price, to recreate just about anything constructed from metal, timber and metal, in recent years the industry has been transformed with the advent of large scale 3D printers meaning even plastic parts can be formed from either specifications or scans of an original.  The 1955 design for the location of the luggage was thoughtful and a fine example of space utilization but, cognizant of Sir Isaac Newton's (1642–1727) laws of motion, today's regulators would be less than pleased.  In April, 2025, the car was offered for sale on the Bring-a-Trailer on-line auction site.

The part-numbers for the bolts of fabric: L1 Blue-Grey (A 000 983 44 86 / 5000), L2 Red-Green (A 000 983 44 86 / 3000) & L3 Green-Beige (A 000 983 44 86 / 6000).

Paparazzo

Paparazzo (pronounced pah-puh-raht-soh or pah-pah-raht-tsaw (Italian))

A freelance photographer, especially one who takes candid pictures of celebrities to sell to publishers; noted for their symbiotic invasion of the privacy of the subjects.

1961: A borrowing of the Italian surname Paparazzo, a character (the freelance photographer) in Federico Fellini's (1920–1993) 1960 film La Dolce Vita.  The more familiar noun plural (which can be used for all purposes regardless of context) is paparazzi, pronounced pah-puh-raht-see or pah-pah-raht-tsee.

The surname carries no meaning within the film; there’s no historic or etymological relationship either to the plot or photography.  The name is not uncommon in the region of Calabria and Fellini is said to have borrowed it from a travel book, By the Ionian Sea (1901) by George Gissing (1857–1903) which the director was reading (in Italian translation) during filming in 1959; in the book is mentioned a hotelier, Signor Coriolano Paparazzo.  The photographer in the film is played by Walter Santesso (1931-2008).  Paparazzo, which technically is the singular form only, is hardly ever used to refer to an individual photographer, the plural paparazzi instead the preferred form which is so pervasive that a female photographer, who should be a (morphologically standard in Italian) paparazza, is also a paparazzi.  Some dictionaries even list an alternative spelling for the plural as paparazzos but there seems no evidence of use and it may exist only because the rules of English say it can.  Paparazzo is a noun and because of the patterns of use, while paparazzi has probably become assimilated and is thus now part of the English language, the less-commonly used paparazzo probably remains "foreign". 

The quality of symbiosis is sometimes strained: Lindsay Lohan and the paparazzi.  For everything you do, there’s a price to be paid.

All forms must now be thought full-assimilated English words and the exclusive use of paparazzi has become correct English.  Because of the circumstances under which paparazzo, paparazzi & paparazza entered English, as a re-purposing of a proper noun, the “rules” under which they operate are those defined by the pattern of use.  The users spoke and it’s now paparazzi all the way.  Paparazzi is thus both noun-singular and noun-plural, masculine & plural.  Historically, there will be those who insist it has become a plurale tantum (from the Latin pluralia tantum (plural only)), a noun that appears only in the plural form and does not have a singular variant for referring to the individual object.  Some dictionaries do allow it can refer also to nouns the singular form of which is rare or archaic.  All bases seem covered.  One shouldn’t too deeply dwell on plural forms from other languages which in English have taken on a life of their own, despite remaining obviously “foreign”.  Spaghetti is an Italian plural which translates literally as “little straps” but in English it’d sound absurd to say “the spaghetti are delicious”. 

The paparazzi focus on Socks, circa 1992.

Lindsay Lohan of course understood the potentially transactional relationship between paparazzi and subject and could exploit as well as being exploited but did admit one of the attractions of life in Dubai is there the parasitic profession is banned.  Not all however can move and for eight years Socks was resident in Washington DC where, although becoming accustomed to being photographed, he seemed never to perfect any signature poses.  Socks (1989-2009) was FCOTUS (First Cat of the United States 1993-2001)) and belonged to Chelsea Clinton (b 1980; FDOTUS (First Daughter of the United States 1993-2001)).

The "freelance" status may be misleading in that there have been paparazzi known to to work exclusively for one buyer (who was more likely an agent than an editor or publisher) although for this reason and that they certainly weren't formally on the payroll.  In most cases though the paparazzi can be thought of as proto-gig economy workers in that from an industrial relations viewpoint they were independent contractors even if in some cases their entire income might come from the one entity (indeed, some had signed contracts of exclusivity guaranteeing at least a right of first refusal with a scale of payment on some negotiated basis).

The symbiosis of stars and the paparazzi

Anita Ekberg (1931–2015) in Federico Fellini's (1920–1993) La Dolce Vita (translated variously as "the sweet life" or "the good life", 1960, left) and soon after, on location (as it were) in London's Berkley Hotel (right).  The famous scene in La Dolce Vita was shot while she splashed in the waters of Rome's Trevi Fountain.

Ms Ekberg understood the often symbiotic relationship between paparazzi and their subjects, sometimes willing sometimes not.  Long after the event, cheerfully she would admit the famous incident in the lobby of London’s Berkley Hotel when her dress “burst” open, was a publicity stunt pre-arranged with a freelance photographer.  Although doubtlessly well-rehearsed, as might be expected from a trained actor it was one of history's more accomplished "planned wardrobe malfunctions".  Frequently, interpretations of Ms Ekberg's technique is seen on social media platforms (real people don't call them "the socials") but not all the young ladies who have followed in her wake so well disguise the artifice.

Snarge

Snarge (pronounced snn-arj)

(1) In military & civil aviation, slang, the remains of a bird after it has collided with an airplane (ie bird strike), originally of impacts with turbine engines but latterly applied also to residue left on wings, fuselages etc.

(2) By adoption, the remains of birds and insects left on the windscreens of trains, cars, motorcycle fairings etc,

Early 2000s (probably): A portmanteau word, a blend of sn(ot) + (g)ar(ba)ge.  Snot (used here in the usual sense of “mucus, especially that from the nose”) was from the Middle English snot & snotte, from the Old English ġesnot & snott, from the Proto-West Germanic snott & snutt, from the Proto-Germanic snuttuz (nasal mucus), from the same base as snout and related to snite.  It was cognate with the North Frisian snot (snot), the Saterland Frisian Snotte (snot), the West Frisian snotte (snot), the Dutch snot (snot), the German Low German Snött (snot), the dialectal German Schnutz (snot), the Danish snot (snot) and the Norwegian snott (snot).  Trans-linguistically, “snot” is commendably consistent and its other uses (a misbehaving (often as “snotty”) child; a disreputable man; the flamed-out wick of a candle all reference something unwanted or undesirable).  That said, snot (mucus) is essential for human life, being a natural, protective, and lubricating substance produced by mucous membranes throughout the body to keep tissues moist and act as a barrier against pathogens and irritants like dust and allergens, working to trap foreign particles; it also contains antimicrobial agents to fight infection.  So, when “out-of-sight & out-of-mind” it’s helpful mucus but when oozing (or worse) from the nostrils, it’s disgusting snot.

Garbage (waste material) was from the late Middle English garbage (the offal of a fowl, giblets, kitchen waste (though in earlier use “refuse, that which is purged away”), from the Anglo-Norman, from the Old French garber (to refine, make neat or clean), of Germanic origin, from the Frankish garwijan (to make ready).  It was akin to the Old High German garawan (to prepare, make ready) and the Old English ġearwian (to make ready, adorn).  The alternative spelling was garbidge (obsolete or eye dialect).  Garbage can be used of physical waste or figuratively (ideas, concepts texts, music etc) judged to be of poor quality and became popular in computing, used variously to mean (1) output judged nonsensical (for whatever reason), (2) corrupted data, (3) memory which although allocated was no longer in use and awaiting de-allocation) or (4) valid data misinterpreted as another kind of data.  Synonyms include junk, refuse, rubbish, trash & waste.  Charlie Chaplin (1889–1977) used “Herr Garbage” as the name of the character who in The Great Dictator (1940) represented Dr Joseph Goebbels (1897-1975; Nazi propaganda minister 1933-1945).  Snarge is a noun and no derived forms have ever been listed but a creature which has become snarge would have been snarged and the process (ie point of impact) would have been the act of snarging.  Snarge is inherent the result of a fatality so an adjective like snargish is presumably superfluous but traces of an impact which may not have been fatal presumably could be described as snargelike or snargesque.

Dr Carla Dove at work in the Smithsonian's Feather Identification Laboratory, Washington DC.

The patronymic Dr Carla Dove (b 1962) is manager of the Feather Identification Laboratory at the Smithsonian Institution’s National Museum of Natural History in Washington DC where she heads a team identifying the types or species of birds that collide with military and civil aircraft.  She calls snarge “a term of art” (clearly she’s of the “eye of the beholder” school) and notes that although the scientific discipline of using snarge to determine the species involved in bird strikes began at the Smithsonian in 1960, the term doesn’t seem to have been coined there and its origin, like much slang with a military connection, is murky.  Although a 2003 article in Flying Safety magazine is sometimes cited as the source of the claim the word was “invented at the Feather Identification Laboratory”, Dr Dove is emphatic the staff there “borrowed it” from preparators (the technicians who prepare bird specimens for display or other uses by museums).  It certainly seems to have been in general use (in its specialized niche in military & aviation and wildlife safety circles) by at least the early-to-mid 2000s and the zeitgeisters at Wired magazine were in 2005 printing it without elaboration, suggesting at least in their editorial team it was already establish slang.  So, it may long have been colloquial jargon in museums or among those working in military or civil aviation long before it appeared in print but there no documentary evidence seems to exist.

The Feather Detective: Mystery, Mayhem, and the Magnificent Life of Roxie Laybourne (2025) by Chris Sweeney.

The origin of the scientific discipline is however uncontested and the world’s first forensic ornithologist was the Smithsonian’s Roxie Laybourne (1910–2003).  In October, 1960, a Lockheed L-188 Electra flying as Eastern Airlines Flight 375 out of Boston Logan Airport had cleared the runway by only a few hundred feet when it flew into a flock of birds, the most unfortunate of which damaged all four engines, resulting in a catastrophic loss of power, causing the craft to nosedive into Boston Harbor, killing 62 of the 72 aboard.  Although the engines were turbo-props rather than jets, they too are highly susceptible to bird-strike damage.  At the time, this was the greatest loss of life attributed to a bird-strike and the FAA (Federal Aviation Authority) ordered all avian remains be sent to the Smithsonian Institution for examination.  There, Ms Laybourne received  the box of mangled bone, blood & feathers and began her investigation, her career taking a trajectory which would include not only the development of protocols designed to reduce the likelihood of bird strikes damaging airliners but also involvement with the USAF (US Air Force) & NASA (National Aeronautics and Space Administration).  Additionally, her work with the FBI (Federal Bureau of Investigation) and various police forces proved forensic ornithology could be of use a diagnostic tool in crime-solving; her evidence helping to convict murderers, kidnappers and poachers.  In 2025, journalist Chris Sweeney published The Feather Detective: Mystery, Mayhem, and the Magnificent Life of Roxie Laybourne, a vivid telling of the tale of a woman succeeding in a world where feminism had not yet wrought its changes.

Snarge on the nosecone of a Cessna Citation, Eisenhower Airport, Wichita, Kansas, July 2021.  The dent indicates the point of impact, the airflow holding the corpse in place.  By the time of landing, the leaked body fluids had congealed to act as a kind of glue.

The study of aviation bird strikes is obviously a specialized field but snarge has come also to be used in the matter of insect deaths, specifically what has come to be called the “windscreen phenomenon” (also as “windshield phenomenon” depending on linguistic tradition).  What that refers to is the increasingly common instances of people reporting they are seeing far fewer dead insects on the windscreens of their cars, many dating the onset of the decline to the late 1990s and the most common explanations offered for this are (1) climate change, (2) habitat loss and (3) the increasing use (or potency) of pesticides.  Individual observations of one’s windscreen now tending to accumulate less snarge than in years gone by is of course impressionistic and caution must be taken not to extrapolate the existence of a global trend from one piece of glass in one tiny part of the planet: what needs to be avoided is a gaboso (the acronym for Generalized Association Based On Single-Observation (also as the derived noun & verb) which is the act of taking one identifiable feature of someone or something and using it as the definitional reference for a group (it ties in with logical fallacies).  However, the reports of increasingly snargeless windscreens were widespread and numerous so while that didn’t explain why it was happening, it did suggest that happening it was.

There was also the matter of social media platforms which have meant the volume of messages about a particular topic in the twenty-first century is not comparable with years gone by.  It’s simply impossible to calculate the extent to which these mass-market (free) platforms have operated as an accelerant (ie a force-multiplier of messaging) but few doubt it’s a considerable effect.  Still, it is striking the same observations were being made in the northern & southern hemispheres and the reference to the decline beginning in the late 1990s was also consistent and a number of studies in Europe and the US have found a precipitous drop in insect populations over the last three decades.  One interesting “quasi theory” was the improved aerodynamic efficiency of the modern automobile meant the entomological slaughter was reduced but quickly aeronautical engineers debunked that, pointing out a slippery shape has a “buffer zone” very close to the surface which means "bugs" have a greater chance of being sucked-in towards the speeding surface because of the differential between negative & positive pressure.  However, on most older vehicles, the “buffer zone” could be as much as 3 feet (close to a metre) from the body.  A bug heading straight for the glass would still be doomed but the disturbed air all around would have deflected a few

Lindsay Lohan with Herbie in Herbie: Fully Loaded (2005).

Herbie was a 1963 Volkswagen Type 1 (Beetle, 1938-2003) and despite the curves which made it look streamlined, its measured Cd (drag coefficient) was typically around 0.48-0.50, some 8% worse than contemporary vehicles of comparable frontal area.  What that meant was its buffer zone would extend somewhat further than the “New Beetle” (1997-2011) which had a Cd between 0.38-0.41, again not as good as the competition because it was compromised by the need to maintain a visual link with the way things were done in 1938.  On the 1963 models (like Herbie) the flat, upright windscreen created significant drag and was obviously a good device for “snarge harvesting” but the later curved screen (introduced in 1973 with the 1303) probably didn’t spare many insects.

Dr Manu Saunders' graphic example of insect snarge on a windscreen during the 2010 "locust plague" in western NSW (New South Wales), Australia, April 2010.

Dr Manu Saunders is a Senior Lecturer in Ecology and Biology and the School of Environmental and Rural Science in Australia’s UNE (University of New England) and she pointed out that “anecdata is not scientific evidence” and just because anecdotes are commonly presented as “evidence of global insect decline” (the so-called “insectageddon”), that doesn’t of necessity make locally described conditions globally relevant.  The problem she identified was that although there have been well-conducted longitudinal studies of snarge on windscreens using sound statistical methods, all have used data taken from a relatively small geographical area while around the planet, there are more than 21 million km (13 million miles, (ie more than 80 round trips to the Moon) of “roads”).  Dr Saunders does not deny the aggregate number of insects is in decline but cautions against the use of one data set being used to assess the extent of a phenomenon with a number of causal factors.

Still snarge-free: The famous photograph of the 25 917s assembled for inspection outside the Porsche factory, Stuttgart, 1969.  The FIA’s homologation inspectors declined the offer to test-drive the 25 which was just as well because, hastily assembled (secretaries, accountants and such drafted in to help), some of were capable of driving only a short distance in first gear.

Fortunately for Porsche, in 1969, although the decline in global insect numbers may already have begun, they were still buzzing around in sufficient numbers to produce the snarge which provided the necessary clue required to resolve the problem of chronic (and potentially lethal) instability which was afflicting the first 917s to be tested at speed.  In great haste, the 917 had been developed after the Fédération Internationale de l'Automobile (the FIA; the International Automobile Federation and world sport's dopiest regulatory body) “relaxed” the rules which previously had set a threshold of 50 identical units for cars classified as Group 4 (5 litre (305 cubic inch)) sports cars, reducing this to a minimum of 25.  What that meant was Porsche needed to develop both a car and a twelve cylinder engine, both items bigger and more complex than anything they’d before attempted, things perhaps not overly challenging had the typical two years been available but the factory needed something which would be ready for final testing in less than half the time.  Remarkably, they accomplished the task in ten months.

Porsche 917 LH Chassis 001 in the livery of the IAA (Internationale Automobil-Ausstellung (International Automobile Exhibition)) used for the Frankfurt Motor Show.

The brief gestation period was impressive but there were teething problems.  The fundamentals, the 908-based space-frame and the 4.5 (275 cubic inch) litre air-cooled flat-12 engine (essentially, two of Porsche’s 2.25 (137 cubic inch) litre flat-sixes joined together) were robust and reliable from the start but, the sudden jump in horsepower (HP) meant much higher speeds and it took some time to tame the problems of the car’s behaviour at high-speed.  Aerodynamics was then still an inexact science and the maximum speed the 917 was able to attain on Porsche’s test track was around 180 mph (290 km/h) but when unleashed on the circuits with long straights where over 200 mph (320 km/h) was possible the early 917s proved highly unstable, the tail “wandering from side-to-side” something disconcerting at any speed but beyond 200 mph, frightening even for professional race drivers.

On Mulsanne Straight, Le Mans: The slippery 917 LH (left) which proved "unsafe at high speed" (left) and the (slightly) slower 917 K (right) which, in the hands of experts), was more manageable.

The instability needed to be rectified because the 917 had been designed with "a bucket of Deutsche Marks in one hand and a map of the Le Mans circuit in the other" and these were the days before the FIA (Fédération Internationale de l'Automobile (International Automobile Federation and world sport's dopiest regulatory body)) started insisting chicanes be spliced into any straight where high speeds beckoned and the Mulsanne Straight at Le Mans was then an uninterrupted 6 km (3.7 mile) straight line.  There, the test results and slide-rule calculations predicted, the 917s would achieve in excess of 360 km/h (224 mph).  Serendipitously, physics and nature combined to show the team where the problem lay: After one alarming high speed run, it was noticed that while the front and central sections of the bodywork were plastered with bloodied snarge, the fibreglass of the rear sections remained a pristine white, the obvious conclusion drawn that while the airflow was inducing the desired degree of down-force on the front wheels, it was passing over the rear of body, thus the lift which induced the wandering.  Some rapid improvisation with pieces of aluminium and much duct tape (to this day a vital tool in the business) to create an ad-hoc, shorter, upswept tail transformed the behaviour and was the basis for what emerged from the factory's subsequent wind-tunnel testing as the 917 K (K for Kurzheck (short-tail).  The rest is history.

Dodge Public Relations announces the world now has "spoilers".  Actually they'd been around for a while but, as Dodge PR knew, until it happens in America, it hasn't happened.

What happened to the 917 wasn’t novel.  In 1966, Dodge had found the slippery shape of its new fastback Charger had delivered the expected speed on the NASCAR ovals but it came at the cost of dangerous lift at the rear, drivers’ graphically describing the experience at speed as something like “driving on ice”.  The solution was exactly what Porsche three years later would improvise, a spoiler on the lip of the trunk (boot) lid which, although only 1½ inches (38 mm) high, at some 150 mph (240 km/h) the fluid dynamics of the air-flow meant sufficient down-force was generated to tame the instability.  Of course, being NASCAR, things didn’t end there and to counter the objection the spoiler was a “non-stock” modification and thus not within the rules, Dodge cited the “safety measure” clause, noting an unstable car on a racetrack was a danger to all.  NASCAR agreed and allowed the device which upset the other competitors who cited the “equalization formula clause” and demanded they too be allowed to fit spoilers.  NASCAR agreed but set the height at maximum height at 1½ inches and specified they could be no wider than the trunk lid.  That left Dodge disgruntled because, in a quirk of the styling, the Charger had a narrower trunk lid than the rest of the field so everybody else’s spoilers worked better which seemed unfair given it was Dodge which had come up with the idea.  NASCAR ignored that objection so for 1967 the factory added to the catalogue two small “quarter panel extensions” each with its own part number (left & right); once installed, the Charger gained a full-width spoiler.

Polka

Polka (pronounced pohl-kuh or poh-kuh)

(1) A lively couple dance of Bohemian origin, with music in duple meter (three steps and a hop, in fast duple time).

(2) A piece of music for such a dance or in its rhythm.

(3) To dance the polka.

(4) As polka-dot (sometimes polka dot or polkadot), a dot or round spot (printed, woven, or embroidered) repeated to form a pattern on a surface, especially textiles; a term for anything (especially clothing) with this design.

1844: From the French polka, from the German Polka, probably from the Czech polka, (the dance, literally "Polish woman" (Polish Polka), feminine form of Polak (a Pole).  The word might instead be a variant of the Czech půlka (half (půl the truncated version of půlka used in special cases (eg telling the time al la the English “half four”))) a reference to the half-steps of Bohemian peasant dances; it may even have been a merger of both.  The dance first came into vogue in 1835 in Prague, reaching London in the spring of 1842; Johann Strauss the younger (1825-1899) wrote many polkas.  Polka was a verb by 1846 as (briefly) was polk and notoriously, the fabric pattern sometimes is mispronounced as "poke-a-dot".  Polka is a noun & verb, polka, polka-dot & polkabilly are nouns and polka-like is an adjective; the noun plural is polkas.

Lindsay Lohan in polka-dot dress, Los Angeles, 2010.

Polka-dot (a pattern consisting of dots (usually) uniform in size and arrangement) is used especially on women’s clothing (men seem permitted accessories such as ties, socks, scarves, handkerchiefs etc) and is attested from 1851 although both polka-spot and polka-dotted are documented in 1849.  

Why the name came to be associated with the then widely popular dance is unknown but most speculate it was likely an associative thing, spotted dresses popular with the Romani (Roma; Traveller; Gypsy) girls who often performed the polka dance.  Fashion journals note that, in the way of such things, the fad faded fast but there was a revival in 1873-1874 and the polka-dot since has never gone away, waxing and waning in popularity but always there somewhere.

In fashion, it’s understood that playing with the two primary variables in polka-dot fabrics (the color mix and the size of the dots) radically can affect the appeal of an outfit.  The classic black & white combination of course never fails but some colors just don’t work together, either because the contrast in insufficient or because the mix produces something ghastly.  Actually, combinations judged ghastly if rendered in a traditional polka dot can successfully be used if the dots are small enough in order to produce something which will appear at most angles close to a solid color yet be more interesting because of the effect of light and movement.  However, once dots are too small, the design ceases to be a polka dot.  It’s not precisely defined what the minimum size of a dot need to be but, as a general principle, its needs to be recognizably “dotty” to the naked eye at a distance of a few feet.

Why Men Like Straight Lines and Women Like Polka Dots: Gender and Visual Psychology (2014) by Professor Gloria Moss.

There’s also the sexual politics of the polka dot, Gloria Moss, Professor of Marketing & Management at Buckinghamshire New University and a visiting professor at the Ecole Superieure de Gestion (ESG) in Paris exploring the matter in her book Why Men Like Straight Lines and Women Like Polka Dots: Gender and Visual Psychology (Psyche Books, 2014, pp 237).  An amusing mix which both reviews the academic literature and flavors the text with anecdotes, Dr Moss constructs a thesis in which the preferences of men and their designs lie in the origins of modern humanity and the need for hunters to optimize their vision on distant horizons while maintaining sufficient peripheral vision to maintain situational awareness, threats on the steppe or savannah coming from any direction.  So men focus of straight line, ignoring color or extraneous detail unless either are essential to the hunt and thus survival, perhaps of the whole tribe.  By contrast, women’s preferences are rooted in the daily routine of the gatherer those millions of years ago, vision focused on that which was close, the nuts and berries to be picked and the infants with their rounded features to be nurtured.  From this came the premium afforded to responsiveness to round shapes, color contrasts and detail.  Being something of an intrusion into the world of the geneticists and anthropologists, reaction to the book wasn't wholly positive but few can have found reading it dull or unchallenging.  Of course, it won't surprise women that in men there is still much of the stone age but, for better or worse, Dr Moss concluded some of them belong there too.

Singer Ariana Grande (b 1993) and her equally famous “snatched high ponytail” in Fendi polka-dots, 2025 MTV Video Music Awards, UBS Arena, Elmont, New York, September 2025.

Over the last few decades, although the popularity on the catwalks would come and go, in the high streets shop-fronts or the on-line catalogues, polka-dots have never disappeared.  Despite that, in April 2025 Vogue magazine announced polka-dots were “making a comeback” for the (northern) spring & summer season by which it seems to have meant the look was returning to designer collections, having apparently been of late consigned to “Holland Park mums on the school run or brunching on the King’s Road”.  Thoughtfully, the magazine included the now obligatory trigger warning, this time urging caution on the trypophobic (those suffering from trypophobia (an obsessive or irrational fear of patterns or clusters of small holes)).  Noting the design’s history of association with the “prim and proper”, Vogue suggested the fabric could be “toughened up with leather” or “mixed with bold colour”, suggesting the striking juxtaposition of “a floaty polka dot dress with your most worn-in leather boots.”  In such matters, Vogue’s editors are the pros and say however it’s done, the trick is “fully to commit”.

Vincent Siriano's Spring/Summer 2026 Ready-to-Wear Collection at Macy’s Herald Square, New York City, September 2025.

US designer Vincent Siriano (b 1985) doubtlessly well knows fashion's classic maxim (one of many): “Don’t mix spots and stripes” but clearly he’s not afraid to disrupt what had become something of an orthodoxy.  It wasn’t always that way and in the 1950s and 1960s when houses often would introduce their lines in the well-upholstered surrounds of up-market department stores, it wasn’t unknown for spots & stripes peacefully to coexist, sometimes in quite striking color combinations.  Whether coincidental or not, Mr Siriano chose to debut his Spring/Summer 2026 Ready-to-Wear Collection at Macy’s Herald Square, now thought a hub more for tourism than fashion.  According to the designer, the nostalgic nod reflected his fondness for such places (or at least what they used to be) and his “ethos of inclusivity and accessibility in the fashion industry.”  Presumably, the store’s sponsorship money made it an especially good place to put a catwalk.

Vincent Siriano's Spring/Summer 2026 Ready-to-Wear Collection at Macy’s Herald Square, New York City, September 2025.

Whether or not with stripes, the black & white polka-dots were eye-catching but what attracted some were the gigot sleeves.  Variously implemented, gigots were billowingly full at the shoulder, diminishing in volume around the elbow before gradually becoming tight at the wrist; the French gigot translating literally as “leg” (and used usually of livestock), in industry slang they were known as the “leg of mutton sleeve”.  In the nineteenth century, the puffy style came and went several times before a few revivals in the 1960s & 1970s were thought to have forever buried the look.  One of the reasons for the sudden “extinction of 1896” was that stylistically it had nowhere to go but “bigger” and the gigot by then truly could be monstrous, some garments demanding 2½ yards (2¼ metres) of material.  The most extreme could retain their shape only with the use of internal whalebone hoops but the development of lightweight plastics and synthetic fabrics meant the gigot’s post-war resurrection was more manageable for both makers and wearers although their impracticality rendered the most voluminous a catwalk item with all that implies.  Mr Siriano including them in 2026 in a “ready-to-wear” collection shouldn’t be taken too literally but he's serious about the polka-dots and indications are they're back in numbers for another season.  It's a welcome return.