Chocolate

Chocolate (pronounced chok-lit (U) chaw-kuh-lit, chok-uh-lit, chawk-lit)

(1) A preparation of the seeds of cacao, roasted, husked, and ground, often sweetened and flavored, as with vanilla.

(2) A beverage made by dissolving such a preparation in milk or water, served hot or cold.

(3) A sweet (sweetmeat (archaic), lolly or candy) made from such a preparation or an individual piece of this sweet.

(4) In the spectrum of commercially produced or described colors, a moderate to deep brown color.

Circa 1600: From the Mexican Spanish chocolate, from the Nahuatl (Aztecan) chocola-tl (chocolate) or cacahua-tl (chocolate, chocolate bean); the -tl meaning "water".   It’s thought the first element might be related to xocalia (to make something bitter or sour from xococ (sour; bitter)).  It was made with cold water by the Aztecs, whereas the Conquistadors mixed it with hot, hence the suggestion the European forms of the word might have been influenced by Yucatec Maya chocol (hot).  It was brought first to Spain in the 1520s and, predictably, spread quickly to the rest of Europe, gaining great popularity by the seventeenth century thought originally as drink made by dissolving chocolate in milk or water, the solid forms now familiar coming later.  The standardization in spelling must have come later because in an entry in his diary on 24 November 1664, Samuel Pepys noted “To a Coffee-house, to drink jocolatte, very good.”

There are those who contest the orthodox etymology, asserting that the Nahutal words upon which it depends didn’t exist in the language until the mid-eighteenth century.  The dissenters prefer chicolātl, a survivor in several modern Nahuatl dialects, as the original form, the chicol- element referring to the specially shaped wooden stick used to prepare chocolate.

Semi-solid forms were on sale by the 1640s in the form of a paste or cake made of ground, roasted, sweetened cacao seeds, the recognisably modern product, described as “chocolate candy" and later just “chocolate” widely available in the later nineteenth century, “chocolate milk” recorded since 1845.  Chocolate chips became available in pre-made form for the consumer market in 1940, having for some time been supplied in bulk to manufacturers for products such as chocolate chip cookies.  Use to describe a color, a dark reddish-brown, dates from 1771 in the forms “chocolate” and “chocolate-brown”.  The adjectival use in the sense of "made of or flavored with chocolate" is attested from 1723.

Although chocolatey (made of or resembling chocolate) apparently can’t be found in print before 1922 and choclatiness seems not to exist although chocolateness is used in commerce, often by specialised retailers which is a bit more imaginative than the eighteenth century “chocolate dealer” and it spawned variations such as chocorama, and chocology.  Devotees are said to be chocophiles while those who cheerfully admit an addiction are chocoholics.  The specialised occupation of chocolatier (maker of chocolate confections) was noted in French in 1865 and such jobs still exist.

In praise of dark chocolate

Made from cocoa solids, sugar and cocoa butter and without using milk, dark chocolate is rich, the degree of bitterness determined by the percentage of cocoa in the mix.  There’s no exact definition of how much cocoa needs to be present for a chocolate to be defined as dark with products available ranging from 50 to over 90%, the most popular being in the 70 to 80% range.

Nutritional content varies greatly because that’s determined by the quantities of cocoa butter and sugar used.  A 70% mix is a high-fat food, a 20g serving (six small squares in most blocks) contains just over 8g of fat, of which 5g is saturated and it’s high in sugar, with around 6g per 20g serving.  The off-set is that it’s a good source of fibre and protein, with approximately 2g of each per 20g serving.  By comparison, an 85% mix is higher in fat but lower in sugar, the protein and fibre content just a little higher and the salt content is negligible although there are variations with added sea-salt.

Lindsay Lohan slicing her chocolate birthday cake.

Although it should never be a high proportion of any diet, dark chocolate does offer some nutritional benefits, being naturally high in iron, magnesium, copper and manganese.  Iron is important in the production of red blood cells which carry oxygen around the body while copper triggers the release of iron to form haemoglobin, the platform which contains the oxygen.  Magnesium ensures the parathyroid glands work normally to produce hormones important in bone health and helps create and activate enzymes, including those which break down food.

A long known benefit of dark chocolate is as a source of antioxidants and flavanols, helpful in maintaining vascular endothelium function (the cells that line the insides of blood vessels) which reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease.  Because of the density, the concentration of these phytonutrients is actually higher than in blueberries and pomegranates, fruits recommended as sources of antioxidants.  There may also be some neuro-protective effects, offering some protection against Alzheimer’s disease but the research is far from conclusive although there does seem to be a small anti-inflammatory effect which helps those with digestive conditions such as inflammatory bowel syndrome.

However, like the much-quoted, but often misunderstood, findings about the health benefits from drinking red wine, there’s nothing from any research to suggest a heavy consumption of dark or any other chocolate is anything but bad.  All the research seems to say is that if one is going to eat chocolate, dark is preferable and consumption should be no more than 20g (typically six small or two large squares, depending on the cut of the block) no more frequently than daily and only as part of a balanced diet.  As a general principle, the darker the better so a chocolate with 90% cocoa offers more benefits than one with less, remembering the flavored products (orange, caramel, raspberry et al) will be higher in sugar.

Ghirardelli Intense Dark 92% Cacao Chocolate.

Making dark chocolate is a relatively long process.  Cacao beans are picked when ripe, cleaned and left to ferment for two to nine days, using naturally present yeasts or a yeast-based starter, depending on bean and manufacturer.  The beans are then covered by banana leaves or put in wooden sweating boxes, temperature, humidity and aeration all adding to the flavor.  Once fermented, the beans are dried and roasted, using a process not greatly different from that used for coffee, this darkens them to a rich brown, enhancing the depth and complexity of the flavor and aroma.  The roasted beans are winnowed (removing the bean’s outer shell, or hull) and the inner bean (or nibs) are then ground or milled at high pressure to produce the cocoa mass (known also as chocolate liquor) and cocoa butter.

The cocoa mass and cocoa butter are then mixed with sugar, producing a paste for conching (a sequence of rolling, kneading, heating and aerating the mixture under heat until it becomes smooth and creamy).  The longer the conche, the smoother will be the chocolate so some premium products can be conched for a week whereas dark chocolate for cooking or the industrial production of food will be processed for only a few hours.  Once conched, a stabiliser such as soy lecithin is added, along with any additional flavors, such as sea salt or vanilla, after which the mix is tempered, a process in which chocolate is brought slowly to the necessary temperature before being poured into molds.  Once cooled, it’s then in its final form: stable, solid and edible.

Foodies, noting the intensity, suggest Cabernet Sauvignon works best with the darkest of dark chocolate, recommending Grenache, Malbec, Merlot, Tawny Port, Shiraz and Zinfandel for anything with a cocoa content under 75%.

There are many spreadable cheeses and those nutty and dense which combine well with chocolates up to 80%.  For the darkest strains, triple cream or blue cheeses work best but, of course, blue cheese goes with anything.

Winds of change.

The noun xocolatophobia describes the exceedingly rare condition in which a patient displays an irrational or disproportionate fear of chocolate.  There are even product-specific instances of the syndrome, the authoritative PhobiaWiki listing M&Mphobia (also known as Mumuphobia and Moukaimouophobia) while noting "not much is known about this phobia".  There’s little to suggest the mental health community has devoted much attention to M&Mphobia and the condition has never appeared in the American Psychiatric Association’s (APA) Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM).  It’s speculated that M&Mphobia may be linked to the anthropomorphism Mars Wrigley use in their marketing material and perhaps even related to achondroplasiaphobia (fear of little people).  Mars Wrigley appears never to have addressed the issue but in early 2022 did announce a “multi-pronged approach” to "creating a world where everyone feels they belong and society is inclusive", the first innovation a makeover for each of the colorful M&M characters.  The manufacturer indicated the changes were to give each of the six characters a "fresh, modern take" on their traditional look and "more nuanced personalities to underscore the importance of self-expression and power of community through storytelling."

The differences were subtle and many may not notice but the most commented upon was the green M&M trading her signature white go-go boots for a pair of "cool, laid-back sneakers to reflect her effortless confidence".  Brown, the other female M&M probably will also be breathing a sigh of relief because after strutting in stilettos since 1940, she gets a pair of more comfortable kitten-heeled pumps.  Further to empower feminist solidarity, Mars Wrigley confirmed the brown & green M&M’s combative days were over and they’re now card-carrying members of the sisterhood, “together throwing shine and not shade".  The changes were well received by some.  National Public Radio’s (NPR) political correspondent Danielle Kurtzleben (b 1983) seemed pleased the green M&M had been liberated from her white boots (with all that they imply) and discussed social reproduction theory, “how patriarchy and capitalism violently reinforce each other”, and what a sexy female M&M “says about gender as a construct”.

The other M&M characters also received slight adjustments to their personalities, notably the eternally morose orange M&M who, while still hardly ebullient, has learned to "embrace his true self, worries and all".  The orange M&M’s condition should now be considered cognizant of the latest edition of the DSM (DSM-5-TR, March 2022) which introduced the diagnosis of Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD).  Details of all the changes are available on a Q&A page on the Mars Wrigley website and Cathryn Sleight (b 1964, then Chief Growth Officer at Mars Wrigley) issued an explanatory press release:

"M&M’S has long been committed to creating colorful fun for all, and this purpose serves as a more concrete commitment to what we’ve always believed as a brand: that everyone has the right to enjoy moments of happiness, and fun is the most powerful way to help people feel that they belong."

It’s not the first time the characters have been adjusted.  Between 1976-1987 the red M&M was actually banished from the packet in reaction to public disquiet about a synthetic red dye (FD&C Red No 2, also known as amaranth) used in the industrial production of food and linked to cancer in a 1971 Russian study.  Amaranth had been widely used in the US, included in products as diverse as ice-cream and hot dog casings and although tests by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) produced inconclusive results in humans, it was found the dye caused malignant tumors in female rats.  The FDA thus concluded amaranth could not be presumed safe for human consumption and in 1976 issued a ban.  Red M&Ms had never actually been colored using the agent but, aware of the controversy, the red M&M was removed from production, not returning until 1987 by which time the usual amnesia had overtaken the land.

Tuft

Tuft (pronounced tuhft)

(1) A bunch or cluster of small, usually soft and flexible parts, as feathers or hairs, attached or fixed closely together at the base and loose at the upper ends.

(2) A cluster of short, fluffy threads, used to decorate cloth, as for a bedspread, robe, bath mat, or window curtain.

(3) A cluster of cut threads, used as a decorative finish attached to the tying or holding threads of mattresses, quilts, upholstery, etc.

(4) To furnish or decorate with a tuft or tufts; to arrange in a tuft or tufts.

(5) In the upholstery trade, to draw together (a cushion or the like) by passing a thread through at regular intervals, the depressions thus produced being usually ornamented with tufts or buttons.  Tufts are not merely decorative because they secure and strengthen mattresses, quilts, cushions et al; they act to hinder the movement of the stuffing.

(6) In botany, a small clump of trees or bushes.

(7) A gold tassel on the cap once worn by titled undergraduates at English universities, one of the more blatant class identifiers if the UK’s class system; the word tuft was also applied to those entitled to wear such as tassel and from this use evolved the slang "toff".

1350-1400: From the Middle English toft & tofte (bunch of soft and flexible things fixed at the base with the upper ends loose), an alteration of earlier tuffe (which endures in the Modern English tuff), from the Old French touffe, tuffe, toffe & tofe (tuft of hair (and source of the modern French touffe)), from the Late Latin tufa (a crest on a helmet (also found in Late Greek toupha) and probably of Germanic origin (the Old High German was zopf and the Old Norse was toppr (tuft, summit).  The earlier European forms were the Old English þūf (tuft), the Old Norse þúfa (mound), the Swedish tuva (tussock; grassy hillock), from the Proto-Germanic þūbǭ (tube) & þūbaz.  It was akin to the Latin tūber (hump, swelling) and the Ancient Greek τῡ́φη (tū́phē) (cattail (used to stuff beds)).  The excrescent t (as in against) was an English addition and tuft was used as a verb from the 1530s.  In some contexts, bunch, cluster, collection, cowlick, group, knot, plumage, ruff, shock, topknot & tussock can impart a similar meaning but tuft is better for its specific purpose.  Tuft is a noun and verb, tufter is a noun and tufty an adjective.  The noun plural is tufts, the present participle tufting and the past participle tufted.

The 1550s noun tuffet (little tuft) was from the Old French touffel (the diminutive suffix -et replacing the French -el) which was a diminutive of touffe.  In English the word is obsolete except for the use in the nursery rhyme Little Miss Muffet which seems to have first appeared in print in 1805 although it (and variations) may have been circulating much earlier.

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet,
Eating her curds and whey;
There came a big spider,
Who sat down beside her
And frightened Miss Muffet away.

Little Miss Muffet in Hell.

Etymologists believe Little Miss Muffet’s tuffet was a grassy hillock or a small knoll in the ground (a variant spelling of an obsolete meaning of tuft).  The latter-day use to refer to a hassock or footstool is an example of how (usually obscure) words can acquire meanings if erroneous definitions are often repeated and come to serve some purpose.  Tuffet for example became a favorite of antique dealers who are apt to call both footstools and low seats “tuffets”, a handy practice perhaps when provenance is doubtful.

Nobleman in full dress at Cambridge (1815) with golden tuft.

The noun toff began as mid nineteenth century lower-class London slang for "a stylish dresser, a man of the smart set.  It was an alteration of tuft, which was a mid-eighteenth century English university (Oxford & Cambridge) term for students who were members of the aristocracy, a reference to the gold ornamental tassel (or tufts) worn on the academic caps (mortarboards) of undergraduates.  Throughout the “long eighteenth century” (a historian’s term which refers for the epoch running from the Glorious Revolution of 1688 to the Congress of Vienna in 1815 (the “long nineteenth” being 1815-1914 and the “long twentieth” 1914-2001 (ie 9/11))), undergraduates at both Oxford and Cambridge were differentiated into four classes: (1) noblemen, (2) gentlemen, (3) commoner-scholars (fellow-commoners at Cambridge) & (4) servitors (sometimes known at Cambridge as sizars and at Oxford as battelers).  Each of these classes of undergraduates was entitled to a different form of dress, noblemen since 1490 (further clarified in 1576) entitled to wear silk and brocaded gowns of bright colors. Such rich materials emphasized noble status, as did the costly dyes. The gowns had flap collars, Tudor bag sleeves with gold lace decorations (akin to the black lace decorations used today on Oxford gimp gowns) and a velvet round cap with a gold tassel (or tuft) was worn.  Noblemen were technically (if misleadingly) nobiles minorum gentium and included the sons of bishops, knights and baronets and, by resolution of Convocation, could include heirs of esquires.

The right to wear the golden tuft was briefly restricted to those with fathers entitled to sit in the House of Lords while those less blue-blooded were allowed only to a plain black tassel but things gradually became less exclusive until the practice was abandoned in the late nineteenth century but the transfer of sense was inevitable: wearers of golden tufts came to be known as tufts.  Those toadies or sycophants (and there were many) who were slavish followers of the tufts were tufthunters and their antics, tufthunting, such individuals and their habits quite identifiable to this day.  By the 1850s, under the influence of the cockney accent, the word had been transformed into toff (some dictionaries of slang noting toft co-existed in the 1850s but this may have been a mishearing) which endures to refer to anyone rich and powerful although the original sense was of someone apparently well-bred.

1912 Stutz Bearcat.  One of the fastest and most admired American cars of the early era, the Stutz Bearcat assumed such a place in popular culture it was (apocryphally) claimed that should anyone die at the wheel of a Stutz Bearcat, they were granted an obituary in the New York Times.

Tufted leather upholstery was common in early automobiles, the seating often exactly the same as those used in horse-drawn carriages, houses or commercial buildings.  The practice faded as production volumes increased and as early as the late 1920s was coming to be restricted to only the most expensive models.  This exclusivity tended to prevail until 1972 when Oldsmobile introduced the Regency option for its full-sized Ninety-Eight models, a package, the visual highlight of which was tufted loose-pillow velour upholstery.  Suddenly, solidly middle-class Oldsmobile (right in the middle of General Motors’ (GM) Chevrolet-Pontiac-Oldsmobile-Buick-Cadillac hierarchy) had brought both velour and loose-pillow seating to the masses.  The velour was at the time much admired and as the tufted upholstery options began to proliferate was usually offered as an alternative to leather.  In some climates the velour was probably the better choice and was welcomingly comfortable although in some of the more strident shades of red could recall the popular idea of how a bordello might be furnished.  Those who'd never enjoyed a visit to a bordello were presumably more disconcerted than regular customers.

Oldsmobile's move was as audacious and influential as Ford’s introduction in 1965 of the up-market LTD which, like the Regency package had the effect of cannibalizing sales from other divisions within the same corporation.  Cadillac, although with a range priced considerably above Oldsmobile, offered nothing with such an ostentatious interior though when it did in 1974 respond with its Talisman package, it made sure it did so with more tufted extravagance still, offering leather as well as velour.  The trend the Regency package started would last over twenty years and is remembered especially for the tufted fittings used in Imperials, Chryslers and Dodges, these said to be trimmed in Corinthian leather, an advertising agency creation which meant nothing in particular but sounded vaguely European and therefore expensive.  Not all the corporation's leather in the tufted era was described as "Corinthian" and such was the success of one advertising campaign that eventually the claim was restricted to one model range but it all came from one supplier so the label tends to be attached to all. 

1977 Chrysler New Yorker Brougham four-door hardtop in Corinthian leather.

Lindsay Lohan in bed with tufted bedhead.

1985 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz in leather.

1989 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham d'Elegance in velour.

Vapid

Vapid (pronounced vap-id)

(1) Lacking or having lost life, sharpness, or flavor; insipid; flat.

(2) Without liveliness or spirit; dull or tedious; flavorless, spiritless, unanimated, tiresome, prosaic.

1650s:  From the Latin vapidus (literally “that has exhaled its vapor”) and related to vappa (stale wine).  The word was used in Latin to describe anything the taste of which was thought bland, flat or insipid.  Related forms include the adverb vapidly and the noun vapidness but the most common form is the noun vapidity which dates from 1721.  The application to talk and text and music thought dull and lifeless dates from 1758.  The Latin vappa (wine without flavor) is still used figuratively in many languages (sometimes as "bit of a vapp") to refer to a man who is "a good-for-nothing" or a bit foppish.

The Koryo Burger

The Koryo Burger package.

It’s estimated that prior to Covid-19, some five-thousand Western tourists annually would visit the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (DPRK; North Korea), a trade it was hoped might quickly recover given it wasn't until early 2022 that the first COVID-19 outbreak of the pandemic was confirmed.  Remaining virus-free for so long was said to be an example of The Supreme Leader’s outstanding administration of the public health system, the outbreak the fault of lazy officials would have been dealt with in the DPRK way.  It’s not yet clear when the boarders will be re-opened, Pyongyang having no desire to expose its happy and grateful population to foreign diseases but one thing prospective tourists hungrily can anticipate is the national airline’s in-flight meal.  Although Air Koryo serves only the famously vapid Koryo Burger, it’s legendarily consistent, always cold and presented on a paper doily.  Inside the bun is a piece of unidentified processed meat, a slice of processed cheese, a dash of shredded cabbage or single lettuce leaf, finished with a dollop of sauce described variously as “reddish” or “brownish”.  Some sources, claiming to have received confirmation from the airline, suggest the meat is chicken but speculation on the Internet has long pondered the matter because it seems impossible to tell from the taste (there isn't any) or texture (said to be equally indeterminate).

The Koryo Burger expanded.

Air Koryo did in the past dabble with other culinary offerings.  Some years ago for several months, for reasons unknown, on some inbound flights full meals appeared including curried rice and side dishes and also served was a sort of sandwich wrapped in a Danish pastry but neither innovation lasted and in recent years it's been burgers all the way, Air Koryo clearly having decided to stick to the classics.  The decision may have been in response to public demand given the cult-following the Koryo Burger has attracted, #koryoburger a must-visit tag for any foodie.  Surely not as repugnant as some have alleged, the many reviews of the experience of eating one seem to struggle to find words adequately to convey blandness rather than awfulness although, apart from the plastic packaging which seems to be of a good standard, there’s no aspect of the burger which escapes condemnation, the buns said always to be stale (either through age, incorrect storage or some flaw in the manufacturing process), the meat patty vapid to the point where it’s been suggested the admired wrapping may be more tasty, the lettuce or cabbage usually limp and the smell of the sauce said to suggest some association with wood-working glue although one reviewer mentioned their relief at finding a thin liquid which oozed from the patty was too watery to be blood.  Most however did concede the slice of processed cheese was about the same as plastic cheese anywhere on the planet.  Koryo burgers are served chilled, apparently straight from the fridge and it may be that this accounts for much of the expressed distaste; were they served at the temperature at which burgers are typically enjoyed, it’s not impossible the Koryo Burger would taste much the same as similar offerings anywhere.

The Koryo Burger surprise.  Until opened, the passenger doesn't know whether the burger will contain lettuce leaves or shredded cabbage.

The airline review site Skytrax has for years consistently rated Air Koryo as the world’s worst airline but unfortunately they don’t provide the qualitative data which might indicate what part the Koryo Burger plays in securing the national carrier's perpetual last place.  It may be Skytrax’s reviewers allowed themselves unduly to be influenced by the burger; the customer write-ups of aspects of Air Koryo not touching on anything culinary actually often positive and not infrequently making the point the DPRK carrier is in some ways superior to some in the West.

The vegetarian option.

Neither can it be denied there has been gastronomic progress in the DPRK’s skies.  While in the days of Kim I (Kim Il-sung, 1912-1994; The Great Leader of DPRK 1948-1994) and Kim II (Kim Jong-il, 1941–2011; The Dear Leader of DPRK 1994-2011), the only choice usually was to eat the burger or not eat the burger, in the new age of Kim III (Kim Jong-un, b circa 1982; The Supreme Leader (originally The Great Successor) of DPRK since 2011), there's now a vegetarian option, which is the familiar Koryo Burger but with sliced cherry tomatoes in place of the meat patty.  Few have commented on the veggie burger but one reviewer praised the tomatoes, saying they tasted better than those he ate elsewhere which tended to look nice and bright but usually lacked flavor.

Air Koryo quality control.

Every morning, the DPRK's Supreme Leader and noted gastronome personally selects the buns used to make Koryo Burgers, the buns Kim Jong-un rejects being fed to political prisoners who are said to be grateful to receive them.  The tradition of the daily selection of buns was started by his grandfather (the Great Leader) and carried on by his father (the Dear Leader).  The Supreme Leader's entourage always carry notebooks and pens in case he says anything interesting.  They all write it down. 

Bathymetry

Bathymetry (pronounced buh-thim-i-tree)

(1) The science and practice of the measurement of the depths of oceans, seas, rivers or other large bodies of water.

(2) The data derived from such measurement, especially as compiled in a data set or topographic map.

1860–1865: The construct was bathy- + -metry.  The prefix bathy- (the alternative form in oceanography and related fields is batho-) was from the Ancient Greek βαθύς (bathús) (deep), zero-grade of the root of βένθος (bénthos), possibly from the primitive Indo-European gehd- (to sink, submerge) or perhaps cognate with the Sanskrit गाढ (gāḍha) (profound, intense, deep, dense, thick, fast, deep (of a color)).  Despite the appearance, it’s unrelated wither to βυσσός (bussós) or βυθός (buthós).  The construct of the suffix –metry (used to form nouns relating to measures and measurement) was -meter +‎ -y.  Metre was from the Ancient Greek μέτρον (métron) (measure), from the primitive Indo-European meh- (to measure) + -τρον (-tron) (a suffix denoting an instrument, as in ancient Greek ἄροτρον (plow) and familiar in English for the used in electronics and physics such as cyclotron.  The –y suffix is from the Middle English –y & -i, from the Old English -iġ (-y, -ic), from the Proto-Germanic -īgaz (-y, -ic), from the primitive Indo-European -kos, -ikos, & -iḱos (-y, -ic).  It was cognate with the Scots -ie (-y), the West Frisian -ich (-y), the Dutch -ig (-y), the Low German -ig (-y), the German -ig (-y), the Swedish -ig (-y), the Latin -icus (-y, -ic), the Sanskrit -इक (-ika) and the Ancient Greek -ικός (-ikós); a doublet of -ic.  The –y suffix was added to (1) nouns and adjectives to form adjectives meaning “having the quality of” and (2) verbs to form adjectives meaning "inclined to".

Bathymetry bathymetrist & bathymeter are nouns, bathymetric & bathymetrical are adjectives and bathymetrically is an adverb; the noun plural is bathymetries.  The derived noun paleobathymetry describes the bathymetry of prehistoric seas.  Paleo was from the Ancient Greek παλαιός (palaiós) (old), from πάλαι (pálai) (long ago).  Most etymologists suggest it was probably cognate with the Mycenaean Greek parajo, which is generally held to mean “old”.  If true, this connection hints at a link with the Proto-Hellenic palai(y)ós and casts doubt on the once often proposed etymology from the primitive Indo-European kwel.

In the UK, the Royal Navy's early use of bathymetric data was to add indications of depth to the Admiralty's charts, the most famous of which was the one which drew the "hundred fathom line" around the British Isles.

When coined in the mid-nineteenth century, bathymetry referred to the ocean's depth relative to sea level, reflecting the information available, given the technology of the time. In the twentieth century, it came to mean “sub-marine topography”, the rendering in images of the depths and shapes of underwater terrain.  In this it’s analogous with topographic maps of land masses which represent the three-dimensional features (or relief) of overland terrain.  Bathymetric maps typically represent variations in sea-floor relief by depicting the changes with color and contour lines called depth contours or isobaths.  Bathymetry provides the baseline data which made possible the modern discipline of hydrography which measures the physical features of a water body.  Hydrography compliments bathymetric data with measurements of the shape and features of shorelines, the characteristics of tides, currents and waves as well as the physical and chemical properties of the water itself.

Bathymetry is thus the study and mapping of the sea floor. It involves obtaining measurements of the depth of the ocean and is the equivalent to mapping the height of features on land.  Bathymetric data is used for a range of purposes including charting and ship navigation, fisheries management, establishing baseline data to support environmental monitoring, the determination of maritime boundaries, alternative energy assessments (most obviously regarding offshore wind and wave & tidal energy), research into coastal processes and ocean currents (the best known aspect of which is tsunami modelling, assessment of the environmental impact on marine geology of resource extraction proposals and the identification of geohazards, such as underwater landslides

Bathymetry map of East Flower Garden Banks National Marine Sanctuary (FGBNMS), a United States National Marine Sanctuary 100 nautical miles (190 km) off Galveston, Texas, in the northwestern Gulf of Mexico.

However, despite the progress of over a century, relatively little is known about the sea floor compared with the surface of the Earth, the Moon and indeed many of the solar system’s other planets and moons.  By area, most map of the sea floor are derived from satellites an low resolution, provide only a vague indication of water depth although whatever the limitations, the technology is clever, the satellite altimetry measuring the height of the ocean surface.  If hills or maintains exist on the seabed at the point of the image, the gravitational pull around that area will be greater and hence the sea surface will bulge and from this measurement maps can be generated showing general features over a large area at low resolution.  More precise maps can be built using single beam echosounders which produce a single line of depth points directly under the equipment.  Taken usually from a moving vessel, they’re typically used to identify general sea floor patterns or schools of fish.  More accurate, high definition maps can be generated by using devices called multibeam echosounders (or swath echosounders) and airborne laser measurements (LADS) which capture swathes of data by acquiring multiple depth points in each area, these data grabbers are accurate to within 1 metre (39 inches).  It was a bathymetric survey which revealed the world’s tallest mountain is not Mount Everest but the Mauna Kea volcano on Hawaii.  Much of its base is on the ocean floor, some 6,000 m (19,685 feet) below the sea-surface and its peak is the highest point in the state of Hawaii, giving an overall height of 10,000 m (32,808 feet).  Mauna Kea is thus a significantly higher feature than Mount Everest which rises 8,800 m (28,870 feet) odd.

Modern electronics represent quite an advance over the nineteenth century techniques of bathymetric measurement which began with a heavy rope being thrown over the side of a ship, the only data gained being recording the length of rope it took to reach the seafloor.  These measurements were however incomplete, and prone to inaccuracy, the rope often shifted by sub-surface currents before reaching the seabed.  At best the data was indicative because the rope could measure depth only one point at a time and there was no way to tell if the point of impact was flat or sloping.  Depending on the area of interest, scientists would have needed dozens, hundreds or even thousands of measurements, something obviously rarely possible.  Accordingly, until the modern age, scientists and navigators estimated the topography of the seafloor and for experienced sailors, the hills and valleys were sometimes easy to predict but the sea can be deceptive and ocean trenches and sandbars often surprised navigators.  Many ships and cargos were lost to ships running aground.

Paraphernalia

Paraphernalia (pronounced par-uh-fer-neyl-yuh or par-uh-fuh-neyl-yuh)

(1) Tools, equipment, apparatus or furnishing used in or necessary for a particular activity (sometimes used with a singular verb).

(2) Personal belongings (used with a plural verb).

(3) At common law, a historic term for the personal articles, apart from dower, reserved by law to a married woman as goods the title of which did not pass to her husband upon marriage (used with a singular verb).

1470-1480: From the Medieval Latin paraphernālia, from the Ancient Greek παράφερνα (parápherna) (goods which a wife brings over and above her dowry), the construct being παρά (pará) (beside) +‎ φερνή (phernḗ) (dowry), + the Latin -ālia, (noun use of neuter plural of –ālis), thus the “things additional to a dowry”.  Among the propertied classes, title to the possessions of a wife (the dowry) passes to the husband upon marriage while the paraphernalia which she brought remained her property. Paraphernalia is a noun and paraphernal is an adjective.  Paraphernalia, perhaps strangely, is now inherently singular because a paraphernalia is a granular construct made of a number of items.  The Medieval Latin paraphernālia was the neuter plural of paraphernlis, pertaining to the parápherna (a married woman's property exclusive of her dowry) so in the Latin it was a plural and the singular was paraphernlis but the word has been absorbed into English as a plural.  Paraphenalium has been suggested but is likely just undergraduate humor.

Twenty-first century paraphernalia.

Paraphernalia in what is now the normal conversational sense refers to the “stuff” associated with and sometimes specific to some activity, modern usage by analogy, unrelated to status of ownership.  Hooks, and sinkers are part of the paraphernalia of fishing, brushes and easels those of painting.  The word has become a favorite of police who, when searching for drugs, don’t actually need to find any to bring charges, drug paraphernalia being enough to convince some judges, especially if accused has “a bit of previous”.  The more elaborate synonyms of paraphernalia are appurtenances, accoutrements, parapherna or trappings but most useful and certainly best understood is “stuff”.

Public service announcement: Lindsay Lohan sends the message.

In the context of the illicit use of narcotics, the term “paraphernalia” is sometimes referenced in legislation but there’s often not any attempt to list exactly which items may be considered thus, the definition hanging on purpose rather than form.  It refers to any equipment, product or material used primarily or intended for use in connection with the production, preparation, or consumption of illicit drugs.  Drug users can be imaginative in the adoption of hardware for purposes other than what was in the designer’s mind and a wide range of stuff has appeared as exhibits in prosecutions.  In some jurisdictions, possession, sale or distribution of drug paraphernalia can be unlawful, even if there’s no evidence of the presence of narcotics.  Examples of drug paraphernalia include:

(1) Smoking devices: Pipes, bongs, water pipes, hookahs, and rolling papers used for smoking marijuana, crack cocaine, or methamphetamine.  Obviously, some of these items can also be used lawfully to consume (dual-use in the language of sanctions) substances like tobacco so the possibility of prosecution depends on the circumstances of each case.

(2) Syringes and needles: These typically are associated with intravenous drug use, most infamously heroin and other opioids but there are many substances (including Diazepam (Valium) and other pharmaceuticals) which can appear in liquid form.

(3) Spoons and straws: Small spoons or hollow tubes (often depicted in popular culture being rolled from high-value US$ bills) are used to “snort” drugs supplied or rendered in powdered form, of which cocaine is the best known.  The popular association of spoons with cocaine led to the comparison “silver spoon vs paper plate” to contrast the user profile with that of the much cheaper crack cocaine.

(4) Grinders: Devices used to break down marijuana buds into smaller particles for smoking or vaporization.  There are specialized products for this but others use the regular kitchen item intended for grinding herbs such as mint when making mint sauce.  Weed smokers like to give their grinders affectionate names like “mull-o-matic”.

(5) Scales: High-precision scales are used to weigh drugs for distribution or sale.  Modern electronics mean these can now be very small.

(6) Roach clips: There are metal or plastic clips used to hold the end of a joint, allowing users to smoke without risk of burning the finger tips.  It’s just common sense really.

(7) Pill bottles and pill crushers: These are used to store and crush prescription medications for illicit use.  In recent years there’s also been a crackdown on pill making devices which also have a legitimate purpose in communities such as the “holistic health” set who make their own pills from (non-narcotic) herbs.

(8) Freebase kits: One of the part-numbers associated with the trade of the dark web, the kits include the tools needed to convert cocaine hydrochloride into a smokable form, such as crack cocaine.

Historically, at common law, upon marriage, a woman’s assets became possessions of her husband, title passing automatically.  The exception was her paraphernalia which tended to include things inherently personal (clothes, sewing equipment, shoes etc) but could in certain circumstances include items of jewelry.  A husband could neither appropriate nor sell paraphernalia without her explicit consent and they did not accrue to his estate upon death but a woman could include paraphernalia in her will.  Concept is now obsolete in all common law jurisdictions but can still be cited in disputes over wills, though only in argument and the scope is limited.

Medieval paraphernalia.

Inherited from Greek and Roman law, in English law, paraphernalia differed from some of the property rights granted to women and mentioned in various iterations of the Magna Carta (1215-1225) in that it wasn't mentioned and assumed an at times strained co-existence with customary practice, the procedures of the Church, common law and civil law, judges feeling often constrained to distinguish between "our law" and "spiritual law", the latter tending always to be more generous to a widow.  All the medieval evidence however does hit that attempts to enforce ecclesiastical law were probably fitful although it may be that matters involving disputes about paraphernalia were either rare or nor recorded.  Where matters are recorded, they concerned not stuff like pins and needles but variations of apparel, a wide category which could include anything a woman might wear and that might be shoes, gowns or jewelry; in other words, like just about any dispute brought to court, money was involved.  Some jurisdictions were more accommodating still, The late-medieval and early-modern Court of Canterbury recognizing a "widow's chamber" which included her bed, the contents of her bedchamber, her apparel, her jewels and the chest in church all was stored.  There exists even records of proto-feminist husbands counter-signing their wife's list of what she considered her paraphernalia; a kind of early pre-nuptial arrangement.  The common law courts of course always preferred the rules of common law to any recognition of customary practice but in the Chancery courts of equity, successive chancellors recognized the local rules of London and York which, although abolished respectively in 1692 and 1724 and neither had anyway mentioned paraphernalia.  Despite the abolition however, at least in some instances, courts in London continued to make awards to widows based on the old rules.

Eighteenth century paraphernalia.

The most significant definitional development regarding paraphernalia dates from 1585 and it turned on the meaning of "apparel", extending the meaning of the term at common law.  What it did was confirm what some earlier judgements had at least implied: That it was no longer confined to pins and petticoats, items of little financial value, the wife in this case claiming as paraphernalia jewels and items of precious metal.  The plaintiff, citing medieval authorities, claimed it was established law that all the apparel of a woman was not paraphernalia but only that which was necessary and essential, ad necessitatem, not baubles and jewels which were ad ornamentum. How the court might have ruled on that as a general principle isn’t known because the matter appears to have been decided on the basis of the social status of the widow, a viscountess, the fourth wife of the viscount and some forty years his junior.  Whether the age difference attracted a sympathetic eye from the bench isn’t noted but the judge agreed that “parapherna” should be allowed to a widow according to her degree and viscountess being of a suitably high degree, he allowed he claim.  She kept the jewels.  While she may not have set a precedent in the narrow technical sense, the report of the case suggests this was not the first occasion where judges had been called upon to define what could be considered apparel based on the social and economic position of the widow, the viscountess certainly seems to have started a trend.  Just about every reported case thereafter, the paraphernalia sought was almost always jewelry.

So there was progress and by the end of the eighteenth century a widow was likely to keep many more of her personal possessions than women six-hundred years earlier, both the common law and equity courts expanding the definitional framework of paraphernalia well beyond the clothes on her back and case law existed to establish a husband could not by the operation of his will deprive his widow of her rights.  However, much still lay ahead, a husband’s debts in some cases still able to absorb paraphernalia, nothing prevented a husband giving away any of his wife’s possessions during his lifetime and a cleverly arranged trust could still defeat just about anything.  Still, progress there had been.

The legal progress attracted not just the odd viscountess but also the author Anthony Trollope (1815–1882), one with an eye for antics of an avaricious aristocracy.  In The Eustace Diamonds (1871), he tracks the progress of the beautiful but entirely unprincipled and recently widowed Lizzie Eustace through the dual plot of her husband-hunting and attempts to keep a cluster of diamonds, it being consequential whether they were an heirloom and therefore the property of her late husband’s heirs, or part of her paraphernalia and thus her own.  Most modern fiction may be worthless but Trollop is rewarding; everyone should read the Chronicles of Barsetshire (1855-1867).

Sporange

Sporange (pronounced spawr-inj, spuh-ange or spor-inj)

In botany & mycology, a cell or structure within any organ (most especially fungi, Ferns, mosses, and algae) in which asexual spores are produced in indefinite numbers by progressive cleavage; also called spore case.

1880: Originally verbal shorthand between scientists; borrowed from the French as if derived from and sharing meaning with the correct term sporangium (plural sporangia, sporangial the adjective); now regarded also as a colloquial term (plural sporanges).  The original Late Latin sporangium dates from 1821 and was from the Ancient Greek σπόρος (sporos) (spore) or σπορά (sporá) (seed) + ἀγγεῖον (angeîon) (vessel).

A sporange (sporangium) is an enclosure in which spores are formed.  It can be composed of a single cell or can be multi-cellular and all plants, fungi, and many other lineages, form sporangia at some point in their life cycle.  Sporanges (sporangia) can produce spores by mitosis (the division of a cell nucleus in which the genome is copied and separated into two identical halves, normally followed by cell division), but in nearly all land plants and many fungi, sporangia are the site of meiosis (cell division of a diploid cell into four haploid (a cell having a single set of unpaired chromosomes cells) which develop to produce gametes (a reproductive cell (sperm in males or eggs in females), having only half of a complete set of chromosomes).

Perfect, half & fake rhymes

Like the word silver, orange has almost no perfect rhymes but the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) lists sporange, a rare alternative form of sporangium, as orange’s only perfect rhyme.  Sporange was a nineteenth century adoption from the French and from the medieval record, the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) also discovered the rare chilver (ewe-lamb, ie a female lamb), (now an almost extinct northern English dialectal form assumed to be Middle English, from the Old English cilfor (lamb), akin to the Old High German kilbur & kilburra (ewe lamb) and related to the Old English cealf (calf)).  Chilver appears to be silver’s only perfect rhyme so both it and orange are phonetically unusual, given English contains at least six-hundred thousand words (albeit not even a fifth of which are in common use).  Both orange and silver do however enjoy half-rhymes, the Oxford Rhyming Dictionary (ORD) listing “lozenge” for orange and “salver” for silver.

A full and stressed rhyme (eg hand / stand) or even an unstressed rhyme (handing / standing) contain vowels common to both words, while a half-rhyme like orange / lozenge or silver / salver has obvious differences between the vowels in certain syllables. The technical term for a half-rhyme is pararhyme.  A variation of the pararhyme seen often in modern poetry and popular culture is the slant rhyme, a trick which works through changing the pronunciation of two words slightly, forcing the rhyme.  Some fastidious critics refuse to call this a literary device and suggest they’re just “lazy” rhymes because they’re fake; close but fake.  A true rhyme pairs “bat” with “cat” while an example of slant rhyming is "door hinge” with “orange”.

2016 Dodge Viper (8.4 litre V10) ACR with Extreme Aero Package in Dodge Yorange (PY5/KY5).

Although there’s nothing to suggest there was interest in the adding to the language's rhythmic possibilities, Chrysler in the early twenty-first century did add Dodge Yorange to the color charts for some models, the construct being y + orange to suggest a shade of orange with a hint of yellow.  The recommended pronunciation was apparently yor-inj and it was most popular on SUVs and high-performance models.  Like the other manufacturers, Chrysler had some history in the coining of fanciful names for colors dating from the psychedelic era of the late 1960s when the choices included Plum Crazy, In-Violet, Tor Red, Sub Lime, Sassy Grass, Panther Pink, Moulin Rouge, Top Banana, Lemon Twist & Citron Yella.  Although it may be an industry myth, the story told is that Plum Crazy & In-Violet (lurid shades of purple) were late additions because the killjoy board refused to sign-off on Statutory Grape.

Ali Lohan (b 1993, left) photographed with her pregnant sister (right) wearing Sandal-Malvina Fringe Tank Dress in (unattributed) Dodge Yorange (left).  The shoes are Alexandre Birmen Clarita Platforms.