Showing posts sorted by date for query Sling. Sort by relevance Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by date for query Sling. Sort by relevance Show all posts

Sunday, August 11, 2024

Crapper

Crapper (pronounced krap-er)

(1) A proprietary trade name for a brand of loo; toilet; lavatory etc.

(2) A slang term for the loo; toilet; lavatory etc.

1920s: The construct was crap + er.  Dating from 1375-1425, crap was from the Middle English crappe (which at various times existed in the plural as crappen, crappies and craps) (chaff; buckwheat) from the Old French crappe & crapin (chaff; siftings, waste or rejected matter).  In the Medieval Latin there were the plural forms crappa & crapinum, apparently from the Old Dutch krappen (to cut off, pluck off) from which Middle Dutch gained crappe & crap (a chop, cutlet) and Modern Dutch krip (a steak); the most obvious modern relative is crop.  The Middle English agent suffix er was from the Old English ere, from the Proto-Germanic ārijaz and generally thought to have been borrowed from the Latin ārius.  The English forms were cognate with the Dutch er & aar, the German er, the Swedish are, the Icelandic ari and the Gothic areis.  Related are the Ancient Greek ήριος (rios) and the Old Church Slavonic арь (arĭ).  Although unrelated, the development of er was reinforced by the synonymous Old French or & eor and the Angle-Norman variant our, all derived from the Latin (ā)tor, the ultimate root being the primitive European tōr.  Dating from 1846, crap was the English slang for the proper term crapping ken which is crap’s first documented application to bodily waste although etymologists suspect it had been in widespread use for some time prior.  In this context, crap was used in the earlier English and French sense of “siftings, waste or rejected matter” and ken was an existing term for a small building or house.

The urban myth is part-truth, part-crap

The brand-name Crapper was first applied to a toilet designed and by plumber Thomas Crapper (1836-1910) and manufactured by the company he founded, Thomas Crapper & Co, Licenced Plumbers & Sanitary Engineers.  In 1884, the Prince of Wales (later Edward VII (1841–1910; King of the UK & Emperor of India 1901-1910)) purchased Sandringham House and asked Mr Crapper to supply the plumbing, including thirty flushing loos with cedarwood seats and enclosures.  Impressed with the quality, the prince granted the company their first Royal Warrant.  The occupational surname Crapper is a dialectal variant of cropper (harvester of crops, farmer).

It’s a linguistic coincidence that a Mr Crapper choose to become a plumber and begin manufacturing loos bearing his name which bore such similarity to both crap and crapping which had earlier been used to describe bodily and other waste.  Despite being a coincidence, decades before the internet spread fake news, the urban myth was well-established that the terms words crap and crapper, in their scatological sense, all derive from the efforts and products of Mr Crapper.  The myth is often fleshed-out with reference to US soldiers stationed in England during World War One popularizing the phrase "I'm going to the crapper", after seeing the name on barracks’ cisterns.  In the way army slang does, it was taken home when the servicemen returned to the US.  Despite this, most dictionaries cite the origin of the slang term to the 1920s with popular use becoming widespread by the mid 1930s.  It spread with the empire and was noted in the era to be in use in the Indian Army although, after 1947, the troops came often to prefer "I am going to Pakistan".

ride) and (4), spit out after brushing and do not rinse (this maintains the fluoride concentration level).

Selfie with crapper backdrop: Lindsay Lohan on the set of HBO's Eastbound & Down (2013), brushing teeth while smoking.  It's an unusual combination but might work OK if one smokes a menthol cigarette and uses a nurdle of mint toothpaste.  Other combinations might clash.

By one's name, one shall be remembered.

The long-standing urban myth that Mr Crapper actually invented the flushing loo seems to lie in the 1969 book Flushed with Pride: The Story of Thomas Crapper by New Zealand-born humorist Wallace Reyburn (1913–2001) which purported to be a legitimate history.  Reyburn later wrote a "biography" of an influential inventor who created another product without which modern life also (for half the population) would be possible but less comfortable.  His 1971 volume Bust-Up: The Uplifting Tale of Otto Titzling and the Development of the Bra detailed the life of the putative inventor of the brassiere, Otto Titzling.  Unlike Mr Crapper, Herr Titzling (Reyburn helpfully mansplaining that the correct pronunciation was "tit-sling") never existed.  In truth, the flushing loo has probably existed in a recognizably modern form since the 1400s but, although the designs were gradually improved, they remained expensive and it was not until the nineteenth century they achieved any real popularity and it was well into the next century with the advent of distributed sanitation systems that they became expected, everyday installations.  To mark the day of his death in 1910, 27 January is designated International Thomas Crapper Day.  Each year, on that day, at the right moment, briefly, all should pause, reflect and then with gratitude, proceed.


Lindsay Lohan mug shots on the doors of the crappers at the Aqua Shard restaurant.  Located on the 31st floor of The Shard in London, the view is panoramic.

Friday, March 8, 2024

Swiftie

Swiftie (pronounced swiftee)

(1) In slang (originally Australian) a trick, ruse, or deception (often in the form “(s)he pulled a swiftie”).

(2) A self-identifying term used by the most devoted (some suggest "obsessed") fans of the musician Taylor Swift (b 1989).  The collective is “Swifties” (the initial capital not always used) and as fandom they distinguish themselves from mere casual listeners although the media tends to apply the term to all.  In 2017, Taylor Swift trade-marked the term Swiftie for commercial use and The Oxford English Dictionary elevated it from “slang” to “word” in 2022; it was a finalist in Oxford’s 2023 Word of the Year judging.

(3) As "Singapore Swiftie", an emerging alternative form for term "exclusivity clause", most associated with contract law.

1945: (for the Australian slang) and (at least) 2010 (of Taylor Swift’s fans):  The construct was swift + -ie.  The word swift existed in the Middle English as an adjective & adverb prior to 900 and was an adjective in the Old English.  It was akin to the Old English swīfan (to revolve) and the Old Norse svīfa (to rove) and was most common as an adjective (moving or capable of moving with great speed or velocity; fleet; rapid; coming, happening, or performed quickly or without delay; quick or prompt to act or respond).  The Old English swift was from the Proto-Germanic swiftaz (swift; quick), from the primitive Indo-European sweyp & weyp- (to twist; wind around) and cognate with the Icelandic svipta (to pull quickly) and the Old English swīfan (to revolve, sweep, wend, intervene).  While the derived forms (swiftly, swiftness etc) are well-known and most have survived, one which went extinct was the thirteenth century swiftship “the ability to run fast”.  In the Australian way, the slang “swiftie” (also often as “swifty”) was also re-purposed as a nickname for someone “slow” (both mentally & physically).  The suffix -ie was a variant spelling of -ee, -ey & -y and was used to form diminutive or affectionate forms of nouns or names.  It was used also (sometimes in a derogatory sense to form colloquial nouns signifying the person associated with the suffixed noun or verb (eg bike: bikie, surf: surfie, hood: hoodie etc).  Swiftie is a noun; the noun plural is swifties.

The surname Swift was of English origin and is thought to have been literally a reference to someone who was “swift” (a fast runner).  There are entries in parish records in Suffolk dating from 1222 recording the birth of “Nicholas, ye sonne of Swyfte” and Swift evolved as a name often given to a messenger or courier (the faster a carrier, the faster the transmission of the message, a concept which has survived into the internet age.  In the household books of the court of Edward III (1312–1377; King of England 1327-1377), a Ralph Swyft was recorded as his courier.  The name became common in England and in later centuries spread throughout the English-speaking world.

As SWIFT, it’s the acronym for the Society for Worldwide Interbank Financial Telecommunication, an international consortium that routes instructions concerning transfer of funds between financial institutions.  Except in the business of money transfers, it was an obscure organization until Mr Putin’s (Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin; b 1952; president or prime minister of Russia since 1999) special military operation against Ukraine when the significance of SWIFT in the commodities markets (where fossil-fuel rich Russia is a big player) became widely understood after the imposition of trade and other economic sanctions.

In the purple: Dr Taylor Swift in academic gown after being conferred an honorary doctorate in fine arts from New York University, May 2022.

The noun swift was applied to name any of numerous long-winged, swallow-like birds of the family Apodidae, related to the hummingbirds and noted for their rapid flight.  Swift was used also of several types of moth, butterfly & lizard noted for their rapid movements and in engineering was used of the adjustable device on the processing apparatus upon which a hank of yarn is placed in order to wind off skeins or balls or the main cylinder on a machine for carding flax.  In the plural, the word was used of the faster-flowing current of a stream or reaches of a river and “swifts” in that sense remains in literary and poetic use although it’s otherwise obsolete.  Historically, the adjective Swiftian meant “of or pertaining to the Anglo-Irish satirist and essayist Jonathan Swift (1667–1745) or his works” (the best known of which were A Tale of a Tub (1704) & Gulliver's Travels (1726) but of late it has in academia been used also of Taylor Swift.  Universities are businesses which operate to make a profit and even Harvard now runs Taylor Swift courses which focus on her musical and lyrical style.  Jonathan Swift in 1713 became Dean of St Patrick's Cathedral, Dublin, thus his later common sobriquet: “Dean Swift”.  It’s thought unlikely Talyor Swift will follow her namesake into ecclesiastical administration.

Operation Hummingbird (1934): Crushing the "Röhm Putsch"

Adolf Hitler looking at Ernst Röhm, 1934.  Suspecting Röhm would at some time "pull a swiftie" on him, Hitler was persuaded to "pull a swiftie" first.  Giver the swiftness at which things were executed, the operation's "hummingbird" tag was well-deserved. 

Nacht der langen Messer (Night of the Long Knives), also called Unternehmen Kolbri (Operation Hummingbird) was a purge executed in Nazi Germany between 30 June-2 July 1934, when the regime carried out a number of extrajudicial executions, ostensibly to crush what was referred to as "the Röhm Putsch".  Targets of the purge were those in the Nazi (National-Socialist) movement labelled as identifying with the need to continue the revolution so it would be as much socialist as it was nationalist.  Ironically, at the time, there was no putsch planned although Ernst Röhm (1887–1934; chief of the Sturmabteilung (the stormtroopers (the SA)), head of the four-million strong SA had certainly in the past hinted at one.  A brutal act of mass-murder (the first of many to follow), the Night of the Long Knives was executed with remarkable swiftness and the most generous interpretation is it can be thought a "preventive" rather than a "pre-emptive strike".  Elsewhere in Europe, the events were noted with some alarm although most statesman of the Western democracies came quickly to conclude (in the Westphalian way) it was an "internal German matter" and it was best politely not publicly again to speak of it.  Among Germans, the lesson about the nature of the Nazi state was well-learned.  

The Singapore Swiftie

The lawyers in the Singapore government have a famously acute commercial sense and wouldn’t have needed the back of an envelope, let also a spreadsheet, to work out that if an exclusivity clause could be agreed with Taylor Swift, guaranteeing her six concerts in the city-state would be her only performances in the region, the economic benefits in terms of inward capital flows would be considerable.  For Taylor Swift’s operation too there would have been advantages, not the least of which would have been Singapore’s high level of security and world-class infrastructure but the cost off-sets would also have been considerable including a reduction in travel expenses and the logistical impositions of touring (the set-up and tear-down of the venues is a major operation with a high labor component).  The amount the government paid for the exclusivity clause wasn’t disclosed but presumably both parties were satisfied with the transaction.  Such is Ms Swift’s cultural power that it seems not even Greta Thunberg (b 2003) was prepared to risk incurring the wrath & indignation of the Swifties by commenting on the addition carbon generated by so many of them flying to see their idol.

Exclusivity clauses are common in commercial contracts and are used variously for purposes such as (1) guarding software, products or services from unwanted distribution, (2) granting exclusive rights to certain parties and forbidding the transfer of those permissions to others, (3) obliging certain parties to purchase products or services exclusively from one’s company rather than a competitor.  So, there’s nothing novel about exclusivity clauses and in most jurisdictions, usually they’re enforceable unless they offend against some over-arching restriction such as “unconscionable conduct” or a violation of competition rules.  As a general principle, the guidelines for an exclusivity clause to be held valid are (1) voluntariness (ie entered into without coercion), (2) certainty of terms (ie no ambiguity), (3) a beginning and an end (although the clauses can, with the agreement of both parties, be extended indefinitely, the clause should be limited in time and renewal & termination protocols must be clear), (4) product & service standards and payment terms must be clear (including variation protocols) and (5) the consequences of any breach must be explicit and detail specific remedies such as monetary compensation.

There are reasons other than the music to become a Swiftie:  The statuesque Taylor Swift in a Sachin & Babi patchwork dress at Capital FM’s Jingle Bell Ball, London, December 2014.  The eye was drawn by the intricate detailing and although some missed her trademark red lipstick, the garment's array of variegated reds meant that would have been too much, the same admirable restraint dictating the choice of black shoes.  Solid colors tend to dominate the red carpet so this piece was a rare splash of genuine adventurism.

Reaction to the deal (soon labeled the “Singapore swiftie”, the formation presumably influenced also by the equally alliterative "Singapore Sling") in the region was swift.  Authorities in Hong Kong & Thailand were immediately critical and one Philippine politician told local media Singapore was operating by “the law of the jungle” and not the law of a “neighborhood of countries bound by supposed principles of solidarity and consensus, a not so subtle reminder that in the neighborhood diplomatic relations have in recent decades been usually smooth, the members of Asean (Association of Southeast Asian Nations), the regional economic and security bloc, famously operating on the basis of “consensus”, a reasonably achievement in an organization of which Myanmar (sometimes still referred to as Burma) is a member.

A Singapore Swiftie: Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.

However, even while the waves from west & north were disturbing Asean’s usually calm waters, Lee Hsien Loong (b 1952; Prime Minister of Singapore since 2004) was addressing the matter of the Singapore Swiftie in a press conference conducted as part of an Asean summit held, unusually, in Melbourne: “A deal was reached.  And so it has turned out to be a very successful arrangement.  I don't see that as being unfriendly” Mr Lee said, confirming an “incentive” had been paid to secure the deal.  That matter had already attracted interest but the Singapore Tourism Board declined to comment on the amount paid, saying the terms were “commercial in confidence” and Taylor Swift's concert promoter was just as reticent.  The math however will have been done by many and not only does the Singapore economy gain from all the visitors arriving to rent hotel rooms, buy food and catch trains but the city state benefits also from its citizens not leaving the territory, taking their money to neighboring countries to spend there.  Thus, Singapore’s gain is the loss of others and while the numbers in the estimates of the benefit gained bounce around a bit, all were in the hundreds of millions of US dollars.

Pulling a swiftie on X (when it was known as Twitter)?

Lindsay Lohan’s tweet to Taylor Swift on 14 December 2020 contained no message but it nevertheless garnered some 8K retweets, 53K Likes and over 1000 responses.  Neither sender nor recipient have ever commented but Twitter's deconstructionists pondered this postmodern message and concluded: "Lindsay Lohan is a Swiftie."

Plenty of touring acts will have noted all of this and while few have anything like the drawing power of Dr Swift, doubtless most will have suggested promoters add the Singapore Swiftie to their negotiating toolbox, the hope being that in playing countries & cities off against each other, a bidding war will ensue; certainly, for decades, the approach has worked well for operators like the IOC (International Olympic Committee), FIFA (Fédération internationale de football association) and Formula One.  Hopefully there’s also a linguistic legacy and in the jargon of law and commerce, the dull & boring “exclusivity clause” will be replaced by the exciting and attractively alliterative “Singapore Swiftie”.

Thursday, February 1, 2024

Mule

Mule (pronounced myule)

(1) The sterile offspring of a female horse and a male donkey; a generalised term for any hybrid between the donkey and the horse.

(2) In informal use, a very stubborn person.

(3) In botany, any sterile hybrid.

(4) As drug mule, slang for a person paid to carry or transport contraband, especially drugs, for a smuggler.

(5) A small locomotive used for pulling rail cars, as in a coal yard or on an industrial site, or for towing, as of ships through canal locks.

(6) As spinning mule, a machine for spinning cotton or other fibers into yarn and winding the yarn on spindles.

(7) A style of open-backed women’s shoe, historically a lounging slipper that covers the toes and instep or only the instep.

(8) In nautical use, a large triangular staysail set between two masts and having its clew set well aft.

(9) In numismatics, a hybrid coin having the obverse of one issue and the reverse of the succeeding issue, or vice versa.

(10) A cocktail in various flavors (Jamaican Mule, Kentucky Mule & Moscow Mule) based respectively on Rum, Bourbon whiskey and Vodka

(11) As mule-deer, a species native to the western United States and so-named because of its large ears.

Pre 1000: From the Middle English mule, from the Anglo-Norman mule and the Old English mūl, both from the Latin mūlus, from the primitive Indo-European mukslós.   Related were the Middle Dutch mūle, the Old French mul (mule, hinny), the Late Latin muscellus (young he-mule), the Old East Slavic мъшкъ (mŭškŭ) (mule), the Phocian Ancient Greek  μυχλός (mukhlós) (he-ass) and the German Maul, Maultier & Maulesel, again derived from Latin.  It’s thought the Latin word was influenced by the Proto-Italic musklo- which is probably (along with the Ancient Greek myklos (pack-mule) and the Albanian mushk (mule)) a loan-word from one of the languages of Asia Minor.  The noun muleteer (mule driver) dates from the 1530s and was from the French muletier, from mulet (mule), a diminutive formation which in French displaced the Old French mul as the word for "mule".  The adjective mulish (possessing the characteristics imputed to the mule) is used of people thought obstinate rather than hard working; the word was in use by 1751 and the  alternative is mulelike (or mule-like), mulesque apparently either never created or not catching on. Mule is a noun & verb, mulishness & muleteer are nouns, mulishly is an adverb and mulish & mulelike are adjectives; the noun plural is mules. 

A mule of the Cyprus Regiment being loaded onto a transport ship, 1940.

As beasts of burden, mules widely were used by all military forces in Greece and the Middle East during World War II (1939-1945).  The Cyprus Regiment (1940-1950) was a unit of the British Army, formed from volunteers who were mostly Greek or Turkish Cypriots but the army's records list also members who were Armenian, Maronite or Latin inhabitants of Cyprus.  In the way such units tended during the conflict to be augmented by elements from other formations, soldiers from a number of Commonwealth nations were also from time to time attached to the establishment.

The mule became a popular pack animal because it was aid to "combine the strength of the horse with the endurance and surefootedness of the ass" and for centuries mules extensively have been bred to select for one characteristic or the other, those working mountainous trails a different beast from those on the plains.  To be zoologically correct, a mule is properly the offspring of a he-ass and a mare; that of a she-ass and a stallion is technically a hinny while a mule born of a horse and a she-ass is a burdon, a late fourteenth century creation from the Latin burdonem.  Ordinarily, male mules are incapable of procreation and commonly the word is applied allusively of hybrids and things of mixed nature.  The phrase "test mule" entered engineering (and later product development generally) in the 1920s to describe devices built for purposes of evaluation and thus expendable, a fate suffered no doubt by many an unfortunate beast. 

The mule's well-deserved reputation as a stellar beast of burden appears in the odd idiomatic form but it's the other traits which accounts for most popular use and perhaps surprisingly, given "stubborn as a mule" now appears in much greater frequency than "dumb as a mule" .  The meaning “stupid person” was noted by the 1470s, that of someone "obstinate or stubborn” not emerging until the eighteenth century although the latter use has endured and "working like a mule" proved an acceptable replacement when "working like an N-word" became proscribed.  There must have been some grounds for the beast picking up its reputation for obstinacy but there seems no evidence of the origin of that but it must sufficiently have been recognized to gain currency and become a proverbial descriptor of stubbornness.  A soul with such a tendency said to be "mulish"; within the family, Winston Churchill's (1875-1965; UK prime-minister 1940-1945 & 1951-1955) daughter Sarah (1914-1982) was nicknamed “the mule” (the English upper classes do like nick-names).  It seems likely the phrase "kick like a mule" was born of bitter experience although modern use is almost exclusively figurative, stronger forms of alcoholic drink commonly attracting the label.  It was formalized as the "Moscow Mule" (a cocktail made with vodka, ginger beer, and lime juice) although in the Western intelligence community that term was used also of traitors in the pay of the Soviet Union.  That use was probably modelled on "drug mule", underworld slang for "a smuggler of narcotics" which was noted as early as 1935 and came into general use in the post-war years.  The mule-deer of the western United States picked up the name because of its strikingly large ears.

Australian architect & multi-media installation Bianca Censori (b 1995), Instagram post, May 2025.

Ms Censori is one of the industry's leading practitioners of minimalist fashion and on this occasion paired a fishnet top with sheer tights, sunglasses the only visible accessory.  Wearing unobtrusive mules rather than the fishnet’s clichéd stilettos was a nice juxtaposition and the background was well-chosen, proving the value of a trained architect's eye.  

The so-named spinning machine dates from 1793 (first known as the "mule jenny" in 1788), the name derived from it being a "hybrid" of Richard Arkwright's (1732–1792) drawing-rollers and the spinning jenny invented by the English carpenter James Hargreaves (circa 1720–1778).  In what seems to have been an imaginative flight of etymological fancy, it was in the eighteenth century suggested the name "mule" was applied because the thing without complaint did so much of the labor which would otherwise have to be undertaken by human hand but there seems no doubt the inspiration was the machine's hybrid origin.  The use to describe the loose slipper worn as footwear was drawn into English in the 1560s from the Old French mule (slipper) from the Latin mulleus calceus (literally “red high-soled shoe”), a shoe worn by Roman patricians and associated with magistrates.  This footwear is unrelated to the long tradition of the Roman Catholic Pope wearing red shoes, the association tracing back to the notion of the blood of Christ falling on his feet as he carried on his back the cross on which he was crucified on Golgotha.  They were made again famous by fashion icon Benedict XVI (1927–2022; pope 2005-2013, pope emeritus 2013-2022) although his successor, Francis (b 1936-2025; pope 2013-2025), favored plain black.

The mule the clog and the slide

Lindsay Lohan in Alexander Wang (b 1983) Amelia mules, Mykonos, Greece, June 2019.  Note the low heel, an example of how the term “mule" is used now by manufacturers to describe just about anything with some degree of openness in the heel.

Mules, by definition are backless but may be sling-backs and can have open or closed toes.  There are many who would classify these as sandals and some manufacturers agree.  In this context "mule" was from the Ancient Roman mulleus calceus a red (or reddish-purple) shoe popular with upper-class Romans and worn as a symbol of office by the three highest magistrates although the scant historical evidence does suggest the Roman footwear looked more like modern clogs than mules and logically, one would expect footwear with thicker, tougher soles would at the time have been preferred for use outdoors.  High-heeled mules became a popular indoor style during the 1700s, influenced by the pattern, a backless overshoe of the sixteenth century, although, by early in the twentieth, mules were often derided as the "dress-wear" of the "better class of prostitutes" and it wasn’t until Marilyn Monroe (1926–1962) adopted the mule in the 1950s they again assumed some respectability.  By the 1990s, mules were among the most popular of shoes, their combination of stylishness, comfort and practicality making them a wardrobe essential.

Chanel Mesh & Grosgrain Mule in black with 3.3 inch (85mm) heel @ US$800, Chanel part-number: G37505 Y55290 94305.

The descriptors mules, clogs and slides are sometimes used interchangeably.  The typical clog is a closed-toed wooden (or other) soled shoe with a heel no more than a couple of inches high.  Clogs are backless (although there are clog boots).  Mules, by comparison, traditionally had a higher heel although the strictness applied to that definition has weakened the emphasis seemingly now on the backlessness although there standards too are loose, slingback mules common.  The term slide derives from being applied to designs permitting the foot to slide in and may thus apply to both mules and clogs rather than being a distinct style.

Thursday, July 27, 2023

Bikini

Bikini (pronounced bih-kee-nee

(1) A two-piece bathing suit for women.

(2) A style of brief fitted low on the hip or slightly below.

(3) The name of an atoll in the North Pacific; one of the Marshall Islands and the site of two-dozen odd US nuclear weapon tests between 1946-1958 (with initial capital).

(4) As Bikini State, the UK Ministry of Defence's alert state indicator (1970-2006).

(5) In the retail coffee trade, barista slang applied to smaller variations such as a demitasse (or demi-tasse (half cup), used traditionally to serve espresso).

(6) In engineering & design, a casual term used sometimes for any shape deemed even vaguely bikinilike. 

1946:  Although known as the Eschscholtz Atoll until 1946, the modern English name is derived from the German colonial name Bikini, adopted while part of German New Guinea and was a transliteration from the Marshallese Pikinni (pʲi͡ɯɡɯ͡inʲːi), a construct of Pik (surface) + ni (coconut or surface of coconuts).  Bikini is a noun and bikinied, bikinilike and bikiniless are adjectives (bikiniesque is non-standard); the noun plural is bikinis.

Highly qualified content provider Busty Buffy in powder blue seekini (a bikini fashioned from a semi-sheer fabric).

In medicine, the “bikini-cut” or “bikini line incision” is doctor’s slang for the “Pfannenstiel incision”, a surgical incision permitting access to the abdomen, the exact location chosen for the optimal aesthetic outcome; it was named after German gynaecologist Hermann Johannes Pfannenstiel (1862–1909), who in 1900 invented the technique.  The modern slang is a reference to the “bikini line” (the part of a woman's pubic region not covered by a swimsuit (the fashion being it’s usually waxed, lasered or shaved to be free of pubic hair)).  In the UK, the technique was popularized by Professor John Munro Kerr (1868–1960) who published his results in 1920 (having first applied the method in 1911) and that's why in the English-speaking world the terms “Kerr incision” and “Pfannenstiel–Kerr incision” both are sometimes used.  In the slang of fat-shaming, a “fatkini” is a bikini larger a certain size and regarding the cut-off point where bikini becomes fatkini, some critics are more uncompromisingly stern than others.

1970 Monteverdi Hai 450 SS.

The skimpiness of the fabric used in a bikini's construction meant it could be used as a point of emphasis.  When in 1970 the Swiss boutique manufacturer Monteverdi displayed the Hai (German for "shark"), one journalist acknowledged the stunning speed but noted the lack of practicality, storage space judged to be adequate for a “topless bikini” (a numokini or unikini in the modern parlance).  Peter Monteverdi (1934–1998) claimed the Hai was "a pre-production prototype" and listed it in his catalogue at a then hefty US$27,000 (more than even the coach-built two-door versions of the Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow and while they would have attracted a very different buyer-profile, the comparison was indicative of market relativities).  The consensus is Peter Monteverdi never intended series-production because the Hai was really just an impractical show-piece built to generate publicity (and in that it succeeded) though four eventually were made with only the first fitted with the charismatic 7.0 litre (426 cubic inch) Chrysler Street Hemi V8.  The other three, two of which were built shortly before Mr Monteverdi's death, used the less powerful but also less cantankerous 7.2 litre (440 cubic inch) unit.  As a footnote for trivia buffs, although it's accepted orthodoxy "the factory never installed air conditioning (A/C) in Street Hemi-equipped cars", Monteverdi did fit A/C to the first Hai so the true truism should read "No Chrysler factory ever..."          

Proliferation; variations on the theme of bikini

Bikinis: Samantha Ronson (left) admiring the black bikini of former special friend Lindsay Lohan (right), both with bare feet, Los Cabos, Mexico, October 2007.

The swimwear was first so named in 1946, the brief as a stand-alone garment adopting the term in 1960 while the trikini, dating from 1967, was a variation with separate bra cups fastened by Velcro.  A lack of structural integrity doomed the design for the mass-market but trikinis continue to be used by the fashion industry, mostly in static photography where movement is minimalized.  Trikini was at the time etymologically wrong because falsely it presumed bikini a compound with a bi prefix, an assumption not unreasonable because the English prefix bi is derived from the Classical Latin bi, which, like the Ancient Greek counterpart di, means “two”.  However, trikini is now etymologically correct because (1) bikini and its variations have been wholly been absorbed into English with compounds coined as needed and (2) progress in the fashion industry proved so prolific a new suffix (apparently first suggested by US author Bill Safire (1929–2009)), emerged: -kini.  Those thus far seen have included:

Monokini (a one-piece swimsuit in a variety of designs which tends to be variations on the notion of a bikini top and bottom in some way connected with (a usually minimal) piece of fabric although for the catwalks, designers have showed "bikinis" in which coverage is afforded to only one breast.

Bikini (a two-piece swimsuit with top & bottom)

Trikini (a type swimsuit which uses three, strategic-placed fabric triangles, sometimes achieved with the use of an adhesive)

Facekini (a piece of swimwear worn on the head and covering the face and head)

Burkini (a full body bathing suit which includes a hood; a kind of figure-hugging Burqa for swimming of which not all muftis & mullahs (and certainly no ayatollahs) approve)

Mankini (a kind of sling bikini for men)

Bandkini (a swimsuit consisting of strapless bandeau top and bikini bottom)

Halterkini (a swimsuit consisting of halter top and bikini bottom)

Tankini (a bathing suit composed of tank top and the lower half of a bikini)

Skirtini (a two-piece swimsuit consisting of top and short, skirted bottom)

Microkini (a very skimpy bikini)

Poligrill's helpful identification chart which illustrates the bikini's mix-and-match potential, wearers able to choose the styles best suited to different parts of the body and no longer is it expected (except by dictatorial types like Vogue's editors) the color or fabric of top need match bottom.

Nokini (an casual identifier for beach which permits toplessness for women)

Slingkini (a one-piece swimsuit resembling the Y-shape frame of a slingshot which is supported by fabric at the neck)

Stringkini (a two-piece swimsuit constructed with string-like cords that is scantier and more revealing than a regular bikini)

Sidekini (a swimsuit designed to optimize the side-boob effect (not suitable for all))

Camikini (a swimsuit consisting of thin-strapped camisole top and bikini bottom)

Flagkini (a swimsuit top informally created by the wrapping of a flag)

Duckini (a swimsuit made of a stick-on material (not to be confused with Kim Kardashian's endorsement of gaffer’s tape for use as ad-hoc corsetry))

Numokini (a bikini worn without the top (also called Unikini))

Underkini (a swimsuit designed to optimize the under-boob effect (not suitable for all))

Seekini (a translucent or semi-translucent swimsuit)

Hikini (a swimsuit with a higher-profile bottom)

Louis Réard with polka-dot bikini (left), an original 1946 Bikini (centre) and Mademoiselle Barnardini during the 1946 photo-shoot, clad in rather more fabric than previously she'd donned for her professional engagements.  

Louis Réard (1896-1984) was a French engineer who took over his mother's lingerie business, the bathing ensemble he designed debuting in 1946; as a concept it wasn’t new, such things documented by many cultures since antiquity but Réard’s design was minimalist by the standards of the time.  It was at the time suggested he choose the name because an exploding A-bomb was his preferred simile for the effect on men but in subsequent interviews he claimed his mind was focused on what he expected expected to be an "explosive commercial and cultural reaction" to his design.  That's a significant distinction but both were based on the detonated device.  Although originally Réard’s registered trademark (patent number 19431), "bikini" has long been generic. When first displayed at Paris's Piscine Molitor (a large swimming pool complex) in July 1946, so scandalous did the established catwalk models find the notion of exposed navels that all declined the job so Monsieur Réard was compelled to hire Mlle Micheline Barnardini (b 1927), then an exotic (ie not infrequently nude) dancer from the Casino de Paris.  For Mlle Barnardini even the skimpiest bikini was more modest than her usual professional lack of attire.  According to M Réard, his inspiration came when on a beach at St Tropez, he observed young ladies rolling up their bathing suits to get a better tan.

Model Adriana Fenice (b 1994) in olive green bikini.

Le Monde Illustré in August 1947 applied a little of their bourgeois intellectual thuggery in comparing the denuding of the surface of Bikini Atoll by the bomb’s blast wave with the near-elimination of flesh-covering material in the swimsuit:  Bikini, ce mot cinglant comme l’explosion même... correspondait au niveau du vêtement de plage à un anéantissement de la surface vêtue; à une minimisation extrême de la pudeur”.  (Bikini, a word now of explosions, compares the effect of the state of the clothing at the beach to an annihilation of the dressed surface; an extreme minimization of modesty.)  Even then however it wasn't something all that novel, two-piece swimwear often seen since at least the 1930s and French fashion designer Jacques Heim (1899–1967) early in 1946 had staged a re-launch of his pre-war two-piece swimsuit which he named the Atome, (atoms then much in the public imagination as something very small yet possessing great power) advertising it as "the world's smallest bathing suit".  However, unlike Réard's creation, it covered the navel, most of the buttocks and more of the breasts, enabling M. Réard truthfully to claim the bikini was "smaller than the smallest bathing suit".  The rest is history.

The bikini and the land yacht

Land yachts: 1972 Imperial LeBaron two-door hardtop (left) and 1978 Chrysler New Yorker two-door hardtop (right).  Although even at the time derided by critics as wastefully absurd, for those inside they were a cosseting cocoon and for many that had much appeal.

The term “land yacht” came into use in the 1970s to describe the huge, luxury automobiles which the major US manufactures all produced and they were strong sellers in early Nixon-era America, surviving the first oil shock (1973-1974) to remain a profitable segment until late in the decade driven extinct by the government edict, the CAFE (corporate average fuel efficiency) dooming the breed.  The Cadillacs and Lincolns were the most emblematic and numerous of the breed but on the basis of length, at 235¼ inches (5975 mm), the 1973 Imperial was actually the biggest.  All were highly inefficient and, despite the dimensions, frequently were transport only for one or two although, once inside, passengers enveloped by leather or velour and the driving experience, although not fast by the standards of today was truly effortless, smooth and quiet.  So isolated from the outside world were occupants from that a frequent comment was they seemed “to float down the road”, hence the term “land yacht”.

Ford Australia advertisement for Landau (1974).  By the time of its release in August 1973, nobody else in Australia did make anything quite like it and the industry's consensus (wishing it the best of luck) was Ford was welcome to the uncontested market sector.

In the US, the term “land yacht” tended to be applied derisively by those who disapproved of the excess, inefficiency and general environmental thuggery the ownership of such things was thought to convey.  It was only in the twenty-first century when they were close to a vanished species the term became almost affectionate as their dubious qualities meant they came to be thought charming nostalgia pieces.  While they were in production however, in promotional material, the manufacturers never called them “land yachts”, preferring words like “luxury” or “exclusive” but in Australia, Ford did run one such associative advertisement for its take on the land yacht: the Landau (manufacturer’s code JG70, 1973-1976).  The advertisement with juxtaposition of Landau and yacht ran in 1974 and there’s nothing to suggest the agency’s idea was anything other than wishing to associate the car with another product on the shopping lists of the rich (or at least the “lease list”, the tax accountant’s tending to provide clients with the “3F Rule” (“If it flies, floats or fornicates, rent or lease, don’t buy.”).  Still, unlike some other cars which might have appealed to the “yacht demographic”, once fitted with a tow bar, the Landau would have been better than many at towing a decent-sized boat.

1973 Ford Landau (front) and 1975 Ford LTD (rear).

The bright colors were not typical of the usually "formal" colors (white, navy blue, maroon etc) chosed by LTD & Landau buyers and only six Landaus were finished in Wild Violet (paint code Z, Shade 13305).  Most of the more lurid hues manufacturers offered during the early 1970s vanished from the color charts when lead was banned from paint, not returning until the next century when new chemical mixes were concocted to replicate what the lead did. 

With only some 1400 made, commercially, the Landau was impressively unsuccessful although the companion four door model (LTD) enjoyed not only solid sales but high profitability because, structurally, it was little more than an elongated Falcon laden with gorp (the word “bling” not then in use).  Dating from the late 1950s, the pleasing “gorp” was a re-purposing (as a noun & verb) by US car designers of the acronym GORP which stood for “granola, oats, raisins, peanuts”, a popular nutritional mix carried by hikers, bush-walkers and such (the designers' notion being the adding of a bit of every decorative thing).  In that spirit, like the LTD, the Landau gained lashings of velour or real leather, fake wood, hidden headlights, a coat of arms of dubious provenance, the novelty of a 24-hour analogue clock and a padded vinyl roof (one of the high points of 1970s fashion).

Ford LTD (P5 & P6) and Landau (ZG70) air-conditioning controls.

Actually, the padding was a really bad idea because the foam tended to trap moisture (especially in the country’s more tropical northern regions) and rust thus became inevitable.  On the Landau, the use of a vinyl roof was particularly cynical because it was cheaper to glue one on than it would have been properly to finish the “plugs” crudely welded in to reduce the size of the rear side windows, rendering a more “formal” roof-line.  Unwanted for years, the Landau is now a collectable and some owners have removed the vinyl roof and properly finished the metalwork beneath, greatly enhancing the aesthetics.  The LTD and Landau did though have some worthwhile features including four-wheel disc brakes (a first for Australia and they were world-class) and a set of aviation-style sliding controls for the air-conditioning, dismissed by some as “an affectation” but really quite fetching and a tactile pleasure.  Surprisingly, although built on the “compact” (in US terms) 111 inch (2819 mm) wheelbase rather than the full-sized platforms of the US land yachts which could have a wheelbase almost 18 inches (457 mm) longer, except in width, the Landau’s interior space was little different.  The dinosaurs of the 1970s however weren’t the first of the species, a bikini-themed US-French hybrid the MRCA (most recent common ancestor).  Despite also using nautical nomenclature, the "boat-tailed" roadsters of the inter-war years belong to a different genus.    

Land yacht: 1948 Le Yacht de la Route "Bikini" by Henri Chapron on the chassis of a 1937 Packard Super Eight.

Before in 1940 taking over his mother’s lingerie business, Louis Réard was an automobile engineer for Renault and one with a flair for publicity so to promote his new swimsuit, he in 1948 commissioned coach-builder Henri Chapron (1886-1971 and in the 1960s to become famous for his various lines of Citroën DS, DW & ID coupés & cabriolets) to build what he called Le Yacht de la Route (the yacht of the road).  Chapron’s design included an actual boat bow, a cabin with portholes, a mast from a yacht and a rear deck where models would pose in bikinis when the car was driven around France on promotional tours.

1937 Packard Super Eight with Formal Sedan coachwork (left) and a 1939 example of the sturdy chassis and straight-eight.  The big Packards of this era were the favored transport of comrade Stalin (1878-1953; Soviet leader 1924-1953), a fair judge of such things.  In the post-war years, Soviet engineers would reverse-engineer the Packard and produce a copy, a common practice the regime (mostly unlawfully) applied to aircraft, military weapons, electronics and much else.  Walt Disney (1901–1966) drove a Packard of this generation and while, on paper, his political philosophy differed greatly from that of comrade Stalin, between them, an organization behaviorist might find more similarities than differences.  More reassuringly, both Marlene Dietrich (1901-1992) and Mae West (1893–1980) at times had big Packards in their garages.

Originally the "Bikini's" coachwork (perhaps "hull" might be a better word) was mounted on the chassis of a 1948 Hotchkiss Artois but its 3.5 litre (212 cubic inch) straight-six proved inadequate to propel to heavy load so it was swapped for that of a 1937 Packard Super Eight, the torquey 6.3 litre (384 cubic inch) straight-eight able effortlessly to cope.  It may have been someone in Detroit was smitten by the portholes because in 1956 a pair appeared (as a “delete option”) on the 1956 Ford Thunderbird’s fibreglass hard-top.  On the Thunderbird they were added to enhance rearward visibility but by the 1970s, reshaped first as ovals before assuming other shapes, they were re-named “opera windows” and became an almost inevitable addition to Detroit's land yachts.  Like the vinyl roof, the fad took an unconscionable time a-dying.

Model Adriana Fenice in another bikini, created ad-hoc with a neon-green & black combo.  Note the difference in the fabric of the two pieces, the mix-and-match "ensemble" approach often taken by bikini-wearers because when, sold in sets, the size which accommodates one part, isn't always a good fit for another.

The curiously named "Bikini State" was the system by which an alert state was defined by the UK's Ministry of Defence (MoD) to warn of non-specific forms of threat, including civil disorder, terrorism or war.  Introduced in 1970, it was in use until 2006 and the MoD's official position has always be "bikini" was a code name selected at random by a computer; those who accept that story are presumably not familiar with the long military tradition of providing misleading answers, either to amuse themselves or confuse others.  There were five Bikini alert states: (1) White which meant essentially there was no indication of a specific or general threat, (2) Black which referred to a situation in which there was heightened concern about internal or external threats, (3) Black Special which indicated an increased likelihood of the conditions which triggered a Black Alert, (4) Amber which confirmed the existence of specific threats or the higher probability of entering a state of armed conflict and (5) Red which covered everything from a specific threat (including the target(s) to actually being in a state of war and at risk of a nuclear strike.

Lindsay Lohan models the MoD's Bikini State alert system rendered as cartoons by Vovsoft, left to right: White, Black, Black Special (string), Amber and Red.  

The need for a system which was better adapted to providing advice to the whole population rather than just the military & civil service was acknowledged after the 9/11 attacks in the US when it was recognised the threat environment had shifted since the Cold War and that the whole country should be regarded as "target rich" in much the way the security services treated Northern Ireland.  Accordingly in 2006, the Government adopted a new five layer system: (1) Low, last seen in the brief, optimistic era between the end of the "troubles" in Northern Ireland (1998) and the week of the 9/11 attacks, (2) Moderate which is about as close to "normal" as anyone now reasonably aspires to achieves and suggests folk should be "alert but not alarmed", (3) Substantial which indicates some event is likely, (4) Severe which indicates a heightened level of threat beyond the substantial and (5) Critical which suggests there is intelligence to indicate an imminent attack and security precaution should be elevated to their highest level.

Many countries have similar systems in place although most maintain different arrangements for civilian & military purposes, the latter always tied to specific protocols and procedures.  Some are trans-nation such as those used by the European Union (EU) and the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) and five-layers used to be the preferred option although this has changed.  In the US the military's DEFCON (defense readiness condition) uses five color-coded levels ranging effecting from "stand easy" to "global thermo-nuclear war is imminent or already begun".  The now defunct civilian Homeland Security Advisory System (HSAS; 2002-2011) used a five-level approach but it was much criticized and since 2011 the US has used National Terrorism Advisory System (NTAS) which is event specific and defined by start and end dates, rather than maintaining the country in some nominal state of alert.

Sala delle Dieci Ragazze (Room of the Ten Girls), a first century AD mosaic in Villa Romana del Casale, Sicily.  For whatever reason, it was a later addition, added atop what's thought to be a conventional geometric mosaic.  

The bikini might in the popular imagination be thought a symbol of Western freedom and something which liberated women from the demands they remain as invisible as possible but the concept of the garment is truly ancient.  Some 2 miles (3.2 km) from the Sicilian town of Piazza Armerina lie the ruins of what would once have been the impressive Roman villa, Villa Romana del Casale.  A UNESCO (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization) World Heritage Site thought to have been built early in the fourth century AD, it contains one of the most extraordinary collections of ancient Roman mosaics, all thought the works of African artists and artisans.  One creation which has proved of great interest is that which sits in what is popularly known as the Sala delle Dieci Ragazze (Room of the Ten Girls), depicting ten women, nine of whom wearing something in the style of two-piece bathing suits, archeologists suggesting the bottom being a loincloth made cloth or leather and known as a subligaculum, a scanty version of the male perizoma worn both as underwear and sometimes by athletes and slaves.  It was a design which is thought to have spread throughout the empire because archaeologists in Britain discovered during the dig of an old well a leather “thong” that was found to date from shortly after the time of Christ.  Its size and shape was exactly that of a modern bikini bottom and it’s now an exhibit at the Museum of London.

The top part was essentially a breast-band, known also to have been worn in Greece where the garment was known as a mastodeton or apodesmos (a strophium to the Romans).  In deference to comfort, mastodetons are thought often to have been made from linen and they were in essence the "sports bras" of Antiquity.  The contribution to fashion is one thing but what interested historians was that the women are clearly participating in sports, their “bikinis” activewear and not swimwear.  Some of the activities are ambiguous but it’s obvious some are running, another is in the throes of throwing a discus while two are engaged in some form of ball sport.  Interestingly, the ball is multi-colored but whether this reflected the nature of sporting equipment in Antiquity or was a piece of artistic license isn’t known.  Of political interest are the young ladies with crowns of roses and palm-fronds, traditionally the prizes awarded to those victorious in athletic competitions so the events were, to some degree, apparently structured.  It’s a myth women in the Roman Empire were always banned from sport although there were restrictions in that men and women competed separately and while, in Athenian tradition, men generally competed naked (something outside the home not permitted for women), the ancient “bikinis” were a compromise which afforded comfort while avoiding unduly exciting any man whose glance might fall upon female flesh.

That the US nuclear tests at Bikini Atoll made the swimsuit a world-wide success was noted by one Australian entrepreneur who, after the British conducted their own tests in October 1952 in the Montebello Archipelago, some 60 miles (100 km) off the north-west coast of Western Australia, attempted to promote his own variation: the Montebello suit (actually a bikini under another name.  The tests, known as Operation Hurricane, came about because the British, fearful of (1) a nuclear-armed Soviet Union, (2) a possibly resurgent Germany and (3) a one-day un-interested United States, were anxious to possess their own independent nuclear deterrent.  The British project proved a success and the UK to this day maintains a boutique-sized but strategically significant array of nuclear weapons and a delivery system which permits them to be aimed at any target on the planet.  The Montebello swimsuit of the early 1950s was not a success but the name has be revived and bikinis using the name are now available.