Bucket

Bucket (pronounced buhk-it)

(1) A deep, cylindrical vessel, usually of metal, plastic, or wood, with a flat bottom and a semi-circular bail, for collecting, carrying, or holding water, sand, fruit etc; a pail.

(2) Any container related to or suggesting this.

(3) In earth-moving and related machinery, any of the scoops attached to or forming the endless chain in certain types of conveyors or elevators.

(4) The scoop or clamshell of a steam shovel, power shovel, or dredge.

(5) A vane or blade of a waterwheel, paddle wheel, water turbine, or the like.

(6) In dam design, a concave surface at the foot of a spillway for deflecting the downward flow of water.

(7) In basketball, an informal term for the field goal; the part of the keyhole extending from the foul line to the end line.

(8) In seat design, as "bucket seat", most associated with cars, an individual seat for one person (as opposed to the bench seat for two or more).

(9) In ten-pin bowling, a "leave" of the two, four, five, and eight pins, or the three, five, six, and nine pins.

(10) To lift, carry, or handle in a bucket (often followed by up or out).

(11) In slang, to ride a horse fast and without concern for tiring it; also, used as slang for driving fast, both mostly UK use.

(12) To handle (orders, transactions, etc.) in or as if in a "bucket shop".

(13) In computer operating systems, as download bucket, a unit of storage on a direct-access device from which data can be stacked and retrieved; a storage space in a hash table for every item sharing a particular key.

(14) A unit of measure equal to four (Imperial) gallons (UK archaic).

(15) In Canadian (mostly Toronto) disparaging slang, a suggestion someone uses crack cocaine.

(16) In slang, an old vehicle that is not in good working order (often as rust bucket).

(17) In variation management, a mechanism for avoiding the allocation of targets in cases of mismanagement.

(18) As "bucket bag", the leather socket for holding the whip when driving (horses and sled-dogs), or for the carbine or lance when mounted (cavalry use).

(19) The pitcher in certain orchids.

(20) A type of narrow brimmed hat, and as slang, hats in general; the use as “brain bucket” is specific to crash helmets.

(21) In rowing, to make, or cause to make (the recovery), with a certain hurried or unskilful forward swing of the body.

(22) A pulley (a now obsolete Norfolk dialectical use).

(23) As "bucket bong", an improvised form of drug paraphernalia assembled for the purpose of smoking weed and consisting of a bucket filled with water and a plastic bottle with the bottom surface removed.  Social media platforms host instructional video clips for those who wish to hone their technique. 

(24) As "bucket list", (1) a list of tasks to be undertaken following discussions (the idea of them being put "in a bucket") and (2) a list of the things one wishes to have done before one dies (ie "kicks the bucket"). 

1250–1300: From the Middle English buket & boket, partly from the Anglo-Norman buket & buqet (tub, pail) and partly from the Old English bucc (bucket, pitcher), (a variant of būc (vessel, belly (cognate with the Old High German būh & the German Bauch)) + the Old French –et.  The suffix –et was from the Middle English -et, from the Old French –et & its feminine variant -ette, from the Late Latin -ittus (and the other gender forms -itta & -ittum).  It was used to form diminutives, loosely construed. The Anglo-Norman words (which in Norman had existed as boutchet & bouquet) were from the Old French buc (abdomen; object with a cavity), from the Vulgar Latin būcus (similar forms were the Occitan and Catalan buc, the Italian buco & buca (hole, gap), from the Frankish būk (belly, stomach).  Both the Old English and Frankish terms derive ultimately from the Proto-Germanic būkaz (belly, stomach).  The modern meaning "pail or open vessel for drawing and carrying water and other liquids" emerged by the mid-thirteenth century, the link to the idea conveyed by the Old English buc (pitcher, bulging vessel (originally "belly")) is that buckets were originally crafted from leather before being made of word and later metal.

Lindsay Lohan taking the #ALSIceBucketChallenge on the Jimmy Fallon show, August 2014.  The Ice Bucket Challenge was a viral event to promote awareness of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS, also known as motor neuron disease and in the United States as Lou Gehrig's disease) and raise money for research.

In idiomatic use, a “drop in the bucket” is a small, usually inadequate amount in relation to what is needed or requested.  To “kick the bucket” (dating from 1785) means “to drop dead” which may be from the unrelated (1570s) bucket (beam on which something may be hung or carried), from the French buquet (balance), a beam from which slaughtered animals were hung (by the heels or hooves).  This may also have been reinforced by the notion of suicide by hanging after standing on an upturned bucket (apparently once a most popular choice for the purpose).  The related “bucket list” is the list of things one should do before dropping dead dates only from 2007 but had earlier been used in coding to describe algorithm sorting.  To “drop the bucket on” is (mostly Australian slang) to implicate, incriminate, or expose, used also in the form to “give (someone) a bucketing”.  Showing a concern for public opinion (an under-researched aspect of the dynamics of totalitarian systems), comrade Stalin (1878-1953; Soviet leader 1924-1953) used the phrase in this sense in 1939 during the negotiations for the Nazi-Soviet Pact when he observed it would be wise to tone down the effusive language describing the friendship between the two dictatorships which were, at least on paper, ideologically opposed (although the various similarities between the two were, even then, acknowledged as quite striking): "For many years now, we have been pouring buckets of shit on each other's heads, and our propaganda boys could not do enough in that direction. And now, all of a sudden, are we to make our peoples believe that all is forgotten and forgiven? Things don't work that fast."  To say the rain is “bucketing down” suggests hard rain or anything in great quantity.  In that sense former National Party (Australia) leader Tim Fischer (1946-2019) in 1998 promised lease-holders of agricultural land the 1998 Native Title Amendment Act would include “bucket loads of extinguishment” (of native title) on those lands.  He was as good as his word.

In most of the English-speaking world, bucket is the preferred term.  Both bucket and pail are used throughout the US, pail most popular in the north, bucket more common elsewhere, especially in the mid-west and the south.  Bucket is a noun, verb and (less commonly) an adjective, the present participle bucketing and the past and past participle bucketed; the noun plural is buckets.

Mercedes-Benz 220 SE Coupé (foreground) & cabriolet (background) with standard rear bench seats, Frankfurt, September 1961 (left) & 1965 220 SE coupé with safari seat option (right).

One rarely specified option on the early Mercedes-Benz W111 (1961-1971; 220 SE, 250 SE, 280 SE & 280 SE 3.5) & W112 (1962-1967; 300 SE) coupés and cabriolets was the fitting of two individual (bucket) seats in the rear instead of the usual bench.  Individual seats in a car’s rear compartment had actually been not uncommon in the early days of motoring but by 1961, when the W111 coupé was released at the Geneva Motor Show, except for a few coach-built rarities, the option was unique.  The factory called then “safari seats”, the source of that being their special metal frame which actually permitted them to be removed and placed on the ground outside, the implication presumably that this would be handy for those on safari who wished to sit outside and watch the zebras.  Whether many of these machines were taken on safari isn’t known but the concept was transferrable to those going on picnics or watching the polo.  On both sides of the Atlantic, the fitting of individual rear-seats caught on for some high-end models but other than in some utility vehicles intended mostly for off-road use, no manufacturer made them removable.

A full bucket of veep.

In the US during the nineteenth century there was a joke about two brothers: "One ran off to sea and the other became vice-president; neither were ever heard of again."  That was of course an exaggeration but it reflected the general view of the office which has very few formal duties and can only ever be as powerful or influential as a president allows although the incumbent is "a heartbeat from the presidency".  John Nance Garner III (1868–1967, vice president of the US 1933-1941), a reasonable judge of these things, once told Lyndon Johnson (LBJ, 1908–1973; US president 1963-1969) being VPOTUS was "not worth a bucket of warm piss" (which is polite company usually is sanitized as "warm spit").  In the US, a number of VPOTUSs (Vice-President of the United States) have become POTUS (President of the United States) and some have worked out well although of late the record has not been encouraging, the presidencies of Lyndon Johnson (LBJ, 1908–1973; VPOTUS 1961-1963, POTUS 1963-1968), Richard Nixon (1913-1994; VPOTUS 1953-1961, POTUS 1969-1974) and Joe Biden (b 1942; VPOTUS 2008-2017, POTUS 2021-2025 (God willing)) 1963-1968, all ending badly, in despair, disgrace and decrepitude respectively.

Microsoft Internet Explorer 1.0 (1995).

Microsoft's Internet Explorer (usually referred to as IE (IE7, IE8 etc by nerds) was in June 2022 officially retired.  It was released in 1995 as part of the Plus! package for Windows 95 which, remarkable as it now seems, shipped to an expectant and receptive market without any vision of it being a platform for internet access, Microsoft's preferred model their proprietary walled-garden the Microsoft Network (MSN).  The public’s reaction meant corporate belief in that model didn't last and MSN was soon re-positioned as just another place to go on the internet.  IE had its early controversies because of the use of code belonging to other companies and subsequently because it was given away or bundled with Microsoft's operating systems, thereby undermining the business model of competing companies which had developed browsers as shrink-wrap products to be sold for a profit.  With a few twists and turns, those issues worked their way (slowly) through US and European courts, Microsoft often using what had become the industry's preferred  solution: Throw money at the problem and it goes away.  That approach was applied too to product development and sometimes it needed to be, Windows 95, IE4 and the then mysterious “Active Desktop” ensemble resisting many attempts to secure stability.   

Lindsay Lohan in bucket hat.

Still, most competition thus eliminated, IE went on to great things and early in the century enjoyed a market-share which at its peak exceeded 90%, the penetration assisted greatly by IE being the choice of many corporations which began using the browser as their default interface for internal as well as external access.  However, this very success was what ultimately doomed IE as Microsoft was compelled to retain much legacy support within the browser to accommodate the corporations which generated so much of Microsoft’s revenue.  Newer competitors were able to offer faster, more flexible browsers with modernized interfaces and gradually gained critical mass, IE by 2020 confined mostly to those corporations using legacy applications with a specific dependence.  Indeed, although noting IE’s retirement, for the affected corporations Microsoft is retaining a small subset of software support on Windows Server 2019 and the Windows 10 LTSC (Long-Term Servicing Channel), the latter in five and ten year programmes.

Pol Roger Champagne ice bucket by Argit of France in nickel plated brass, circa 1920.

Unfashionable though it became, there was one aspect of IE which for years worked better than the implementation on other browsers: The handling of download buckets.  Download buckets are the places on operating systems which permit users to tag files for downloading as a batch, rather than having to download each individually.  For whatever reason, IE’s download buckets seemed for years always more stable than the newer entrants.  Even today, Microsoft’s own update catalogue offers support for a download bucket on IE but not on other browsers although, helpfully, Microsoft’s own (Chromium-based) Edge browser can be configured with an “IE mode” which continues to support the bucket, the “Add” and “Remove” options appearing as before.

Microsoft Update Catalog on IE (and Edge in IE mode).

Microsoft Update Catalog on Chromium-based browsers (and Firefox) in native mode.

Dry and wet: Lindsay Lohan takes the #ALSIceBucketChallenge on the Jimmy Fallon show, August 2014.

Basketweave

Basketweave (pronounced bah-skit-weev (U) or bas-kit-weev (non-U))

(1) A plain woven pattern with two or more groups of warp and weft threads are interlaced to render a checkerboard appearance resembling that of a woven basket; historically applied especially (in garment & fabric production) to wool & linen items and (in furniture, flooring etc), fibres such as cane, bamboo etc.

(2) Any constructed item assembled in this pattern.

(4) In the natural environment, any structure (animal, vegetable or mineral) in this pattern.

(5) In automotive use, a stylized wheel, constructed usually in an alloy predominately of aluminum and designed loosely in emulation of the older spooked (wire) wheels.   

1920–1925: The construct was basket + weave (and used variously as basketweave, basket-weave & basket weave depending on industry, product, material etc).  Basket was from the thirteenth century Middle English basket (vessel made of thin strips of wood, or other flexible materials, interwoven in a great variety of forms, and used for many purposes), from the Anglo-Norman bascat, of obscure origin.  Bascat has attracted much interest from etymologists but despite generations of research, its source has remained elusive.  One theory is it’s from the Late Latin bascauda (kettle, table-vessel), from the Proto-Brythonic (in Breton baskodenn), from the Proto-Celtic baskis (bundle, load), from the primitive Indo-European bhask- (bundle) and presumably related to the Latin fascis (bundle, faggot, package, load) and a doublet of fasces.  In ancient Rome, the bundle was a material symbol of a Roman magistrate's full civil and military power, known as imperium and it was adopted as the symbol of National Fascist Party in Italy; it’s thus the source of the term “fascism”.  Not all are convinced, the authoritative Oxford English Dictionary (OED) noting there is no evidence of such a word in Celtic unless later words in Irish and Welsh (sometimes counted as borrowings from English) are original.  However, if the theory is accepted, the implication is the original meaning was something like “wicker basket”, wicker one of the oldest known methods of construction.  The word was first used to mean “a goal in the game of basketball” in 1892, the use extended to “a score in basketball” by 1898.  In the 1980s, as operating systems evolved, programmers would have had the choice of “basket” or “bucket” to describe the concept of a “place where files are stored or reference prior to processing” and they choose the latter, thus creating the “download bucket”, “handler bucket” etc.  On what basis the choice was made isn’t known but it may be that baskets, being often woven, are prone to leak while non-porous buckets are not.  Programmers hate leaks.

A classic basketweave pattern.

Weave was from the Middle English weven (to weave), from the Old English wefan (to weave), from the Proto-West Germanic weban, from the Proto-Germanic webaną, from the primitive Indo-European webh (to weave, braid).  The sense of weave as “to wander around; not travel in a straight line” was also in the early fourteenth century absorbed by the Middle English weven and was probably from the Old Norse veifa (move around, wave), related to the Latin vibrare, from vibrō (to vibrate, to rattle, to twang; to deliver or deal (a blow)), from the  Proto-Italic wibrāō, denominative of wibros, from the primitive Indo-European weyp- (to oscillate, swing) or weyb-.  The root-final consonant has never been clear and reflexes of both are found across Indo-European languages.  The verb sense of “something woven” dates from the 1580s while the meaning “method or pattern of weaving” was from 1888.  The notion of “to move from one place to another” has been traced to the twelfth century and was presumably derived from the movements involved in the act of weaving and while it’s uncertain quite how the meaning evolved, it’s documented from early fourteenth century as conveying “move to and fro” and in the 1590s as “move side to side”,  In pugilism it would have been a natural technique from the moment the first punch was thrown but formally it entered the language of boxing (as “duck & weave”) in 1918, often as weaved or weaving.  By analogy, the phrase “duck & weave” came to be used of politicians attempting to avoid answering questions.  In the military, weave was also used to describe evasive maneuvers undertaken on land or in the air but not at sea, the Admiralty preferring zig-zag, as the pattern would appear on charts.  The fencing method known as teenage is a kind of basketweave.  Basketweave is a noun & adjective and (in irregular use) a verb and basketweaver is a noun; the noun plural is basketweaves.

Attentive basketweavers: Students in a lecture  (B.A. (Peace Studies)) at Whitworth University, Spokane, Washington, USA.

A basketweaver is of course “one who weaves baskets” but in idiomatic use, basketweaver is used also to mean “one whose skills have been rendered redundant by automation or other changes in technology”.  The term “underwater basketweaving” is used of university course thought useless (in the sense of not being directly applicable to anything vocational) and is applied especially to the “studies” genre (gender studies, peace studies, women’s studies et al).  Beyond education, it can be used of anything thought “lame, pointless, useless, worthless, a waste of time etc”.  Basketweaving is also a descriptor of a long and interlinked narrative of lies, distinguished from an ad-hoc lie in that in a basketweave of lies, there are dependencies between the untruths and, done with sufficient care, each can act to reinforce another, enabling an entire persona to be constructed.  It’s the most elaborate version of a “basket of lies” and can work but, like a woven basket, if one strand becomes lose and separates from the structure, under stress, the entire basket can unravel, spilling asunder the contents.

Official portrait of Representative the honorable George Santos.

A classic basketweaver is George Anthony Devolder Santos (b 1988) who, in the 2022 mid-term elections for the US Congress, was elected as a representative (Republican) for New York's 3rd congressional district.  Although he seems to have passed untroubled through the Republican Party’s candidate vetting process, after his election a number of media outlets investigated and found his public persona was almost wholly untrue and contained many dubious or blatantly false claims about, inter-alia, his mother, personal biography, education, criminal record, work history, financial status, ancestry, ethnicity, sexual orientation & religion.  When confronted, Mr Santos did admit to lying about certain matters, was vague about some and ducked and weaved to avoid discussing others, especially the fraud charges in Brazil he avoided by fleeing the country.  Although a life-long Roman Catholic, Mr Santos on a number of occasions claimed to be Jewish, even fabricating stories about his family suffering losses during the Holocaust.  Later, after the lies were exposed, he told a newspaper “I never claimed to be Jewish.  I am Catholic. Because I learned my maternal family had a Jewish background I said I was ‘Jew-ish.”  In the right circumstances, delivered on-stage by a Jewish comedian, it might have been a good punch-line.

Few are laughing however and Mr Santos is under investigation by both Brazilian and US authorities.  However, despite many calls (from Republicans and Democrats alike) that he resign from Congress, Mr Santos has refused and the Republican house leadership, working with an unexpectedly paper-thin majority, has shown no enthusiasm to pursue the matter.  What Mr Santos has done is expose the limitations of the basketweaving technique.  While a carefully built construct can work, it relies on no loose threads being exposed and while this can be manageable for those not public figures, for anyone exposed to investigation, in the twenty-first century such deceptions are probably close to impossible to achieve and Mr Santos was probably lured into excessive self-confidence because, in relative anonymity, he had for years managed to deceive, fooling many including the Republican Party and perhaps even himself.  In retrospect, he might one day ponder how he ever thought he’s get away with it.  One thing that remains unclear is how he should be addressed.  Members of the House of Representatives typically are addressed as "the honorable" in formal use but this is merely a courtesy title and is not a requirement.  The use is left to individual members and as far as is known, Mr Santos has not yet indicated whether he wishes people to address him as “the honorable George Santos”.

Borrani wire wheels on 1972 Ferrari 365 GTB/4 (Daytona) coupé (far left), “Hotwire” wheels on 1974 Holden Torana SL/R 5000 (centre left), “Basketweave” wheels on 1990 Jaguar XJS coupé (centre right) & 1986 Holden Piazza (far right).

Basketweave wheels remain popular (although some feelings may be strained when it comes time to clean the things) but the use of “basketweave” to describe the construction was a bit of a stretch and some prefer “lattice” which seems architecturally closer.  Were the motif of the classic basketweave to be applied to a wheel it would look something those used on the Holden Piazza, briefly (1986-1989) available on the Australian market.  Because it’s not easy successfully to integrate something inherently square or rectangular into a small, circular object, such designs never caught on although variations were tried.  The “basketweave” wheels which did endure owed little to the classic basketweave patters although there are identifiable hints in the construction so people understand the connection and rather than thought of as a continuation of the design elements drawn from the traditions of weaving, the wheels really established a fork of the meaning.  As a design, they were an evolution of the “hotwire” style popular in the 1970s when was a deliberate attempt to echo the style of the classic spoked (wire) wheels which, being lighter and offering better brake cooling properties than steel disk wheels, were for decades the wheel of choice for high performance vehicles.  That changed in the 1960s as speeds & vehicle weight rose and tyres became wider and stickier, a combination of factors which meant wire wheels were no longer strong enough to endure the rising stresses.  Additionally, the wire wheel was labor intensive to make in an era when that beginning to matter, wheels cast from an alloy predominately of aluminum were cheaper to produce as well as stronger.

Lindsay Lohan in Miami, clothes by Amiparism, Interview Magazine, December 2022.  The car is a Jaguar XJS convertible with the factory-fitted basketweave (or lattice) wheels.

Clamshell

Clamshell (pronounced klam-shel)

(1) The shell of a clam.

(2) Any of a variety of object with two hinged parts and that opens and closes like a clamshell, as a laptop computer or a box with a cover joined on one side (clamshell phone; clamshell computer, clamshell packaging etc).

(3) In dredging and earth-moving machinery, a dredging bucket opening at the bottom, consisting of two similar pieces hinged together at the top (also called the clamshell bucket); a machine equipped with such a bucket.

(4) In printing, a platen press.

(5) Of, pertaining to or noting an object that opens and closes like a clamshell; the opening and closing actions of this object (ie anything resembling the bivalve shell of a clam).

(6) In anatomy, another name for eyelid (technical use only).

(7) In aviation, (1) an aircraft cockpit canopy hinged at the front and rear or (2) the hinged door of a cargo aircraft.

(8) In slang, the mouth (US archaic).

(9) In architecture, an amphitheater, especially an outdoor amphitheater; the semi-circular acoustic backdrop behind and above the performers (a use based (unusually) on the appearance of the shell in only its open state).

(10) In manufacturing, to deform a die in a shape resembling the shell of a clam, as a result of uneven extrusion pressure.

1490–1500: the construct was clam + shell.  Clam was from the Middle English clam (pincers, vice, clamp), from the Old English clamm (bond, fetter, grip, grasp), from the Proto-Germanic klamjaną (press, squeeze together).  Shell was from the Middle English schelle, from the Old English sċiell, from the Proto-West Germanic skallju, from the Proto-Germanic skaljō, from the primitive Indo-European skelh & kelh (to split, cleave).  It was related to the West Frisian skyl (peel, rind), the Dutch schil (peel, skin, rink), the Low German Schell (shell, scale), the Irish scelec (pebble), the Latin silex (pebble, flint) & siliqua (pod) and the Old Church Slavonic сколика (skolika) (shell).  Although sharing a source, the adjective clammy is otherwise unrelated, being from the Middle English clam (in the literally descriptive sense of “viscous, sticky, slimy”) & clammen (“to smear, bedaub”), from the Old English clǣman (to smear, bedaub) and related to the German klamm (clammy) & klemmen (to be stuck, stick).  Clamshell is a noun, the present participle is clamshelling and the past participle clamshelled; the noun plural is clamshells.

Lindsay Lohan with T-Mobile flip-phone Sidekick II, T-Mobile Sidekick II party, The Grove, Los Angeles, August 2004.

In (mostly archaic) US slang, a clam was one dollar (used usually in the plural) and it’s though the origin of this was an allusion to the wampum (a traditional shell bead of the Eastern Woodlands tribes of Native Americans.  It includes white shell beads hand-fashioned from the North Atlantic channeled whelk shell and white and purple beads made from the quahog or Western North Atlantic hard-shelled clam.).  Clams are of some note in the strange history of the Church of Scientology, a tax-exempt operation created by L Ron Hubbard (1911–1986) who constructed its ethos from an amalgam of his science fiction and fantasy stories, combined with pseudo-scientific explanations about the human condition.  His idea (a central tenet of Scientology) that human “thetans” (souls) previously inhabited clams he expanded upon in Scientology: A History of Man (1961) (first published as What to Audit (1952)), explaining that interactions between jellyfish and cave walls were responsible for the emergence of “a shell as in the clam” and that the clam itself suffered from a split personality when he described as a “double-hinge problem” in which “…one hinge wishes to stay open, the other tries to close, thus conflict occurs".  That does of course explain much about the problems of man and, more prosaically, because the clam’s hinges would become the Clam “hinges of the human jaw”, the Clam's method of issuing spores to reproduce is why we suffer toothache.  Who knew?

Trendsetter: The influential clamshell and some of its many imitators.

What engineers and designers liked once to call the “clam shell form factor” was shortened inevitability to “clamshell” but for portable computers and cellular (mobile) phones neither term caught on, laptop soon the ubiquitous choice and phone users preferred the punchier flip-phone.  Laptop endured as the generic description of all such devices and the distinction manufacturers applied to models technically classed as notebooks and netbooks escaped most, any clamshell computer since first they appeared in the early 1980s most often referred to as a laptop.  The flip-phone was a turn of the century fad and actually a good example of packaging efficiency, especially for those who carried their phones in handbags although men, most of whom had only pockets, were never as enthusiastic.  As it was the sleek iPhone and the smartphones which followed in its wake killed off most flips although there was the occasional retro-themed revival.  However, advances in materials had by 2020 made folding screens both durable and economical to produce in volume so these have become the latest variation to use the clam shell, offering all the packaging advantages of old with the benefit of being able to offer a flip screen in a thin form factor, thus appealing also to men, few of whom have been convinced by the utility of that other turn of the century fad: the man bag.

1983 Ferrari 512BBi.  All versions of the BB (1973-1984) used the clamshell design front & rear.

In automotive design, clamshells are used for both front and rear sections of the bodywork, some cars using both.  It was a popular idea on racing machinery like the Ford GT40 or the Porsche 917 because the method of construction used meant the panels carried little load, providing just coverage and aerodynamic optimization.  Some road cars also adopted the idea including Triumph’s Spitfire (and the GT6 derivative) and Jaguar’s E-Type (XKE) and there were real advantages in accessibility for servicing and that’s probably why the bulky Jaguar V12 enjoyed a better reputation among mechanics when under the clamshell than it did in the tighter confines of the XJ or XJ-S (later XJS).  Few mass-market vehicles used the idea and the Triumph Herald and Vitesse (which provided the platforms for the Spitfire & GT6) was one of the few but it was unusual in being built on a separate chassis after most of the industry had switched to unitary construction.

Scoop

Scoop (pronounced skoop)

(1) A ladle or ladle-like utensil, especially a small, deep-sided shovel with a short, horizontal handle, for taking up flour, sugar etc.

(2) A utensil composed of a palm-sized hollow hemisphere attached to a horizontal handle, for dishing out ice cream or other soft foods.

(3) A hemispherical portion of food as dished out by such a utensil.

(4) The bucket of a dredge, steam shovel etc.

(5) In medicine, a spoon-like surgical apparatus for removing substances or foreign objects from the body; a special spinal board used by emergency department staff that divides laterally (ie literally “scooping up” patients).

(6) A hollow or hollowed-out place.

(7) The act of ladling, dipping, dredging etc.

(8) The quantity held in a ladle, dipper, shovel, bucket etc.

(9) In journalism, a news item, report, or story revealed in one paper, magazine, newscast etc before any other outlet; in informal use, news, information, or details, especially as obtained from experience or an immediate source.

(10) A gathering to oneself, indicated usually by a sweeping motions of the hands or arms.

(11) In informal use, a big haul of something.

(12) In television & film production, a single-lens large floodlight shaped like a flour scoop and fitted with a reflector.

(13) To win a prize, award, or large amount of money.

(14) In bat & ball sports, to hit the ball on its underside so that it rises into the air.

(15) In hydrological management, a part of a drain used to direct flow.

(16) In air-induction management (to the engines in cars, boats, aircraft etc), a device which captures external the air-flow and directs it for purposes of cooling or combustion.

(17) In Scots English, the peak of a cap.

(18) In pinball, a hole on the playfield that catches a ball, but eventually returns it to play in one way or another.

(19) In surfboard design, the raised end of a board.

(20) In music (often as “scoop up”), to begin a vocal note slightly below the target pitch and then to slide up to the target pitch, prevalent particularly in country & western music.

1300–1350: From the Middle English scope & schoupe, from the Middle Dutch scoep, scuep, schope & schoepe (bucket for bailing water) and the Middle Dutch schoppe, scoppe & schuppe (a scoop, shovel (the modern Dutch being schop (spade)), from the Proto-Germanic skuppǭ & skuppijǭ, from the primitive Indo-European kep & skep- (to cut, to scrape, to hack).  It was cognate with the Old Frisian skuppe (shovel), the Middle Low German schōpe (scoop, shovel), the German Low German Schüppe & Schüpp (shovel), the German Schüppe & Schippe (shovel, spade) and related to the Dutch schoep (vessel for baling).  The mid-fourteenth century Middle English verb scōpen (to bail out, draw out with a scoop) was from the noun and was from the Middle Low German schüppen (to draw water), from the Middle Dutch schoppen, from the Proto-Germanic skuppon (source also of the Old Saxon skeppian, the Dutch scheppen, the Old High German scaphan and the German schöpfen (to scoop, ladle out), from the primitive Indo-European root skeubh- (source also of the Old English sceofl (shovel) and the Old Saxon skufla.

Sherman L Kelly's (1869–1952) ice-cream scoop (the dipper; 1935) was a masterpiece of modern industrial design and thought sufficiently aesthetically pleasing to be a permanent exhibit in New York's Museum of Modern Art (MoMA).  Its most clever feature was the fluid encased in the handle; being made from cast aluminum, the heat from the user's hands was transferred to the cup, obviating the need for the moving parts sometimes used to separate the ice-cream for dishing out.  The dipper is like the pencil, one of those designs which really can't be improved.

The meaning “hand-shovel with a short handle and a deep, hollow receptacle” dates from the late fifteenth century while the extended sense of “an instrument for gouging out a piece” emerged by 1706 while the colloquial use to mean “a big haul” was from 1893.  The journalistic sense of “the securing and publication of exclusive information in advance of a rival” was an invention of US English, first used in 1874 in the newspaper business, echoing the earlier commercial verbal slang which imparted the sense of “appropriate so as to exclude competitors”, the use recorded in 1850 but thought to be considerably older.  The meaning "remove soft or loose material with a concave instrument" dates from the early seventeenth century while sense of “action of scooping” was from 1742; that of “amount in a scoop” being from 1832.  The noun scooper (one who scoops) was first used in the 1660s and the word was adopted early in the nineteenth century to describe “a tool for scooping, especially one used by wood-engravers”, the form the agent noun from the verb scoop.  Scoop is a noun & verb, scooper & scoopful are nouns and scooped & scooping are verbs; the noun plural is scoops.

XPLR//Create’s fluid dynamics tests comparing the relative efficiency of ducts (left) & scoops (right).

In air-induction management (to the engines in cars, boats, aircraft etc), a scoop is a device which captures external the air-flow and directs it for purposes of cooling or combustion.  An air scoop differs from an air duct in that a scoop stands proud of a structure's surface allowing air to be "rammed" into its ducting while a duct is an aperture integrated into the structure, "sucking" air in from the low pressure zone created by its geometry.  For a given size of aperture, a scoop can achieve an airflow up to twice that of a duct but that doesn't of necessity mean as scoop is always preferable, the choice depending on the application.  In situations where optimal aerodynamic efficiency is desired, a duct may be chosen because scoops can increase frontal area and almost always, regardless of placement, leave a wake of turbulent air, further increasing drag.  It's thus one of those trade-offs with which engineers are familiar: If a scoop is used then sufficient air is available for purposes of cooling & combustion but at the cost of aerodynamic efficiency while if a duct is fitted, drag is reduced but the internal air-flow might be inadequate.

NACA Ducts: 1969 Ford Shelby Mustang GT500 (left), 1971 Ford Mustang Mach 1 351 (centre) & 1972 Ford Falcon GTHO Phase IV (Right).

When Ford introduced NACA ducts on the 1971 Mustangs (subsequently adopted by Ford Australia in 1973 for the XB Falcon), whether in error or to take advantage of the public’s greater “brand-awareness” of the National Aeronautics & Space Administration (NASA), they were promoted as “NASA ducts”.  In fairness, the two institutions were related, NASA created in 1958 after the National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics (NACA) was dissolved, the process essentially a name change although much had changed since the NACA’s formation in 1915, the annual budget then US$5000 and the dozen committee members unpaid.  The NACA duct was one of many innovations the institution provided to commercial and military aviation and in the post-war years race cars began to appear with them, positioned variously to channel air to radiators, brakes and fuel induction systems as required.

Scoops: 1969 Ford Mustang Boss 429 (left), 1969 Ford Mustang Mach 1 428 CobraJet (with shaker scoop) (centre) & 1974 Pontiac Trans Am 455 SD (with rearward-facing scoop) (right).

From those pragmatic purposes, the ducts migrated to road cars where often they were hardly a necessity and, in some cases, merely decorative, no plumbing sitting behind what was actually a fake aperture.  Scoops appeared too, some appearing extravagantly large but there were applications where the volume of air required was so high that a NACA duct which would provide for the flow simply couldn’t be fashioned.  That said, on road cars, there were always suspicions that some scoops might be fashionably rather than functionally large, the lines drawn in the styling and not the engineering office.  There was innovation in scoops too, some rearward facing to take advantage of the inherently cool, low pressure air which accumulated in the cowl area at the base of the windscreen although the best remembered scoops are probably the “shakers”, assemblies protruding through a hole in the hood (bonnet) and attached directly to the air-cleaner which sat atop the carburetor, an arrangement which shook as the engine vibrated.  By such things, men are much amused.

The inaugural meeting of the National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics (NACA), 23 April 1915.

A New York Post scoop, 29 June 2007.  This was the Murdoch press's biggest scoop since the publication in 1983 of the "Hitler Diaries".  The "diaries" turned out to be forgeries; the picture of Lindsay Lohan resting in a Cadillac was genuine.

Shemozzle

Shemozzle (pronounced sch-moz-il)

(1) In slang, a state of chaos or confusion (especially if noisy); an uproar.

(2) In slang, a quarrel (especially if noisy).

(3) In slang, to run away; to flee; to scarper (rare).

Late 1800s (in English and some sources cite 1889 as the first known instance of use): From the Yiddish שלימזל (shlimazl) (bad luck; difficulty; misfortune), the construct being shlim (bad, ill), from the Middle High German slimp (awry, not right) + the Hebrew מַזָּל (mazzāl), from the Late Hebrew mazāl (luck, fate, (one’s) star) and cognate with the US English schlimazel (an unlucky person).  There are many variations of the German joke (such things really exist, even in Prussia) to explain the related nouns shlemiel & shimazl but all are in the flavor of: “A shlemiel is the fellow who climbs to the top of a ladder with a bucket of paint and then drops it and a shimazl is the fellow on whose head the bucket falls.”  The colloquial German noun Schlamassel (plural Schlamassel) (trouble, difficult situation, misfortune) was from the same Yiddish source.  The gender of Schlamassel is usually masculine in Germany except in the southern state of Bavaria where, like the neighboring Austria it can also be neuter, this prevalent in the latter.  Because from the ninth century Yiddish evolved from its West-Germanic origins as a vernacular tongue which a number of forks & parallel streams in Europe, the Middle East and North America before being (sort of) standardized in the mid-twentieth century in “Western” and “Eastern” variants, many words spread by oral use and the a variety of spellings was not unusual and other spellings of shemozzle included: chemozzle, chermozzle, chimozzle, schemozzle, schimozzle, schlemozzle, schmozzle, shamozzle, shimozzel, shimozzle, shlemozel & shlemozzle.  The modern alternative spelling is schmozzle.  Schmozzle is a noun & verb and shemozzled & shemozzling are verbs; the noun plural is schmozzles (which is sometimes used also as a singular).  In humorous use, shemozzle is used also as a collective noun.

Because there’s rarely been reluctance by English-speakers to adopt words from other languages if they’re useful, better than what’s in use or just an attractive alternative, there no compelling reason to use shemozzle because there are so many other words and phrases to describe states of noisy chaos or confusion.  Obvious candidates include frenzy, mess, fiasco, snafu, chaos, clusterfuck (often sanitized as the clipped “cluster”), commotion, hubbub, kerfuffle, débacle, disarray, confusion, turmoil, ado, affray, altercation, argument, battle, bickering, brawl, brouhaha, bust-up, bustle, clash, combat, commotion, competition, conflict, contention, controversy, debate, discord, dispute, muddle, dissension, disturbance, dustup, fracas, quarrel, row, ruction, scandal, strife, struggle, tiff, tumult, uproar, wrangle, disorganized, disorder, mayhem, pandemonium, uproar, havoc & bedlam.  That the list is long suggests shemozzles are a significant and not infrequent feature of human interaction and the choice of which to use is one of nuance, the connotation one wishes, some of the words emphasizing the chaos, some the conflict.  Shemozzle is an attractive choice because (1) most know what it means, (2) it’s not commonly heard so has some novelty value and (3) it's a "fun" word to say.

A media shemozzle snapping Lindsay Lohan walking into LA Superior Court, Los Angeles, February 2011.

A shemozzle can be used to illustrate chaos theory, a conceptual model of the phenomenon of an event’s ultimate trigger being something distant and apparently unconnected with its consequences.  Physicists illustrate the idea by speculating that waving one’s hands in the air might, some billions of years hence, alter the Earth’s speed of rotation and the most commonly quoted thought experiment is the metaphor for the behavior: “Can a butterfly flapping its wings in Brazil cause a tornado in Texas?”  It’s an intriguing topic for those building big-machine models which can both explore and reveal patterns in what was once thought randomness.

The shemozzle of reporters and photographers clustered when Lindsay Lohan in February 2011 walked to one of the well-publicized (and not infrequent) court appearances of her “troubled Hollywood starlet” phase wasn’t unexpected and nor would she have found it an unfamiliar environment, the yellow & black plastic “Police Line: DO NOT CROSS” tape strung between the bollards vaguely reminiscent of the velvet rope & stanchions which define the limits for photographers at red-carpet events.  What was unpredicted was the almost immediate effect in commerce, the white Kimberly Ovitz (b 1983) Glavis Albino bandage dress from the houses pre-fall collection reported as “sold out worldwide” within hours of the images appearing on-line, a reasonable achievement for a piece listed at US$575 made in a run of a few hundred.

The matter before the court raised no novel legal points and thus attracted little analysis but the re-purposing of the walk to the arraignment as an impromptu catwalk strut triggered a shemozzle of its own as women around the world clamoured to buy their own Glavis Albino and media companies sought comment from Kimberly Ovitz, anxious to learn if the appearance was some sort of “sponsored promotion”.  A representative from the company was soon quoted as saying “Kimberly had no role in Lindsay Lohan wearing the dress” which Ms Lohan had purchased.  Apparently disappointed, the journalists resorted to dutifully noting her “signature Chanel 5182 sunglasses.”

Ms Lohan that evening tweeted: “What I wear to court shouldn’t be front page news. It’s just absurd” although her choice of wardrobe for subsequent court appearances hinted she may have concluded absurdity has its place and at Kimberley Ovitz’s corporate headquarters the reaction was equally pragmatic, the company offering retailers a “re-cut” (the industry term for a second production run, a la a “second printing” in the publishing world) of the Glavis Albino in response to the phones “ringing off the hook”.  “It’s been a frenzy!” CBS News quoted an Ovitz sales associate as saying.  So that’s a case study in how the choice should be made: A rabble of photographers milling behind the bollards while shouting questions is “a shemozzle” while desperate fashionistas and boutiques besieging a designer for a frock is “a frenzy”.  Now we know.