Friday, May 8, 2020

Hypocrite & Pharisee

Hypocrite (pronounced hip-uh-krit)

(1) A person who pretends to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles etc., that they do not actually possess, especially a person whose actions belie stated beliefs.

(2) A person who feigns some desirable or publicly approved attitude, especially one whose private life, opinions, or statements belie his or her public statements.

1175–1225: from the Middle English ypocrite & ipocrite (false pretender to virtue or religion), from the Old French ypocrite (the Modern is French hypocrite), from the Ecclesiastical Latin hypocrita, from the Ancient Greek ποκριτής (hupokrits) (a stage actor, one who plays a part), from ποκρίνομαι (hupokrínomai) (I answer, act, feign, the construct being from hupo(krinein) (to feign (from krinein (to judge) + -tēs (the agent suffix).  Hypocrite is a noun (and long ago an adjective), hypocritical an adjective and hypocritically an adverb

Hypocrite came to English from the Ancient Greek hypokrites, which translates as “an actor”, the word a compound noun, the construct being two Greek words that literally translate as “an interpreter from underneath.”  That sense may sound strange but is actually literal, the actors in ancient Greek theater wearing large masks to indicate the part being played, thus they interpreted the story from underneath their masks.  This meaning endured from Antiquity, the Greek word later taking on an extended meaning to refer to someone said figuratively to be masked and thus pretending to be someone or something they were not.  This sense was taken-up in medieval French and subsequently English, where initially it used the earlier spelling ypocrite and in thirteenth century was used to refer to someone who pretends to be morally good or pious in order to deceive others.  Hypocrite gained its initial h- by the sixteenth century and it wasn’t until the early 1700s that it assumed in general use the now familiar modern meaning “a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings”, some five-hundred years after those striding English stages were so-described.

The adjective hypocritical (of, pertaining to, or proceeding from hypocrisy) dates from the 1540s (as implied in hypocritically) and prevailed over hypocritish (1520s) & hypocritic (1530s).  It was adjectivally innovative because from the thirteenth century, Middle English used the simple hypocrite as the adjective as well as the noun.  In Scottish, the late fifteenth century Lowrie (the characteristic name of the fox) was also used in the dual sense of "crafty person; hypocrite”

Hypocrite is so precise and well-understood that synonyms really aren’t required to convey any intent of meaning but for literary purposes there’s also bigot, charlatan, crook, impostor, phony, trickster, actor, backslider, bluffer, casuist, cheat, deceiver, decoy, dissembler, dissimulator, fake, four-flusher, fraud, humbug, informer, pretender & pharisee.  That such an impressively long list exists is a commentary on the human condition.  The noun dissembler is probably closest; a dissembler is “one who conceals his opinions, character etc, under a false appearance, one who pretends that a thing which is not".  Attested since the 1520s, it’s the agent noun from dissemble.

Pharisee (pronounced far-uh-see)

(1) A member of a Jewish sect that flourished between the second century BC and first century AD (during the Second Temple Era (536 BC-70 AD) which differed from the Sadducees principally in its strict observance of religious ceremonies and practices, adherence to oral laws and traditions (as interpreted rabbinically), belief in an afterlife and the coming of a Messiah (always with initial capital).  The movement was ultimately the basis for most contemporary forms of Judaism.

(2) Of or pertaining to the Pharisees.

(3) A sanctimonious, self-righteous, or hypocritical person (usually and correctly with initial lower-case).

(4) In figurative (and usually derogatory or offensive) use, a person who values the letter of the law over its spirit or intention; a person who values form over content.

Pre 900: From the Middle English Pharise & Farise, from the Old English Fariseos & Farīsēus, from the thirteenth century Old French pharise, from the Church Latin Pharisaeus (a variant of Pharīsaeus), from the Ancient Greek Φαρισαος (Pharisaîos), a transliteration of the Aramaic פְּרִישַׁיָּא‎ (pərîšayyâ’), emphatic plural of פְּרִישׁ‎ (pərîš) (separatist (literally “separated”)) and related to the Hebrew פרוש‎ (parush), qal passive participle of the verb פָּרַשׁ‎ (pāraš) (one who is separated for a life of purity), from parash (the Aramaic (Semitic) pərīshayyā was the plural of what is usually rendered as perīsh & pərīshā (literally “separated”)).  The extended meaning "any self-righteous person, formalist, hypocrite, scrupulous or ostentatious observer of the outward forms of religion without regard to its inward spirit" dates from the 1580s.  There’s no agreement between scholars about whether "Pharisee", derived words meaning “separated; set apart" refers to a physical separation from impure gentiles or a doctrinal separation from less religiously rigorous Jews and there’s even a suggestion they were regarded as "separatists" in the modern political sense.  The derived terms pharisaic, pharisaical, pharisaically, pharisaicalness, pharisaism & phariseeism (used according to context with and without an initial capital) are rarely used except in biblical scholarship or especially learned (and usually critical) legal texts.

The ancient Jewish sect which flourished between the second century BC and first century AD was distinguished the strict observance by its members of laws of behavior & ritual but were so extreme in their adherence that others came to regard them as pretentious and self-righteously sanctimonious and one of those others, recorded in the Gospel of Matthew was Jesus Christ himself:

Then spake Jesus to the multitude, and to his disciples,

(23) Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

(24) Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel.

(25) Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess.

(27) Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men's bones, and of all uncleanness.

(28) Even so ye also outwardly appear righteous unto men, but within ye are full of hypocrisy and iniquity.

Matthew 23 (King James Version (KJV 1611))

The recently revealed text messages sent by Australia’s deputy prime minister Barnaby Joyce (b 1967; thrice deputy prime-minister 2016-) included a character assessment of Prime Minister Scott Morrison (b 1968; Prime Minister of Australia 2018-) as “…a hypocrite and a liar from my observations and that is over a long time,” adding “I have never trusted him, and I dislike how earnestly [he] rearranges the truth to a lie.”  That was good but more amusing still was Mr Joyce’s “unreserved” apology to which he added the reservations that (1) it was a long time ago (10 months) and he was younger then, (2) he didn’t really know him at the time the message was sent (they’ve served together in cabinet for most of the last decade), (3) his opinion since he got to know him better has softened and he now thinks he’s a fine chap “of high integrity and honesty” and (4), he was in a bad mood when sending the message.

Given the ferocity of the critique, one might have thought Mr Morrison may have been consumed by hatred and vengeful thoughts but, perhaps feeling constrained by Luke 6:37…:

Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven. (King James Version (KJV 1611))

… issued a statement saying he’d forgiven Mr Joyce his trespasses, a gesture which either demonstrates some generosity of spirit or hints at his increasingly perilous political position.

Grace Tame looking at Scott Morrison, The Lodge, Canberra, annual pre-Invasion Day (aka Australia Day) festivities, 25 January 2021 and, arm in sling, after “a bike stack”.

Mr Joyce however may still nervously be looking over his shoulder.  A few days after Grace Tame (b 1994; activist for survivors of sexual assault & 2021 Australian of the Year), not best pleased with some aspects of Mr Morrison’s commitment to helping victims of sexual assault, spoiled one of his prized photo-opportunities by fixing him with a frosty stare rather than the expected asinine smile, she was involved in an accident, tumbling from her bike, breaking a collarbone and sustaining the odd graze.  There is no suggestion either Mr Morrison or the Liberal Party’s squad of dirty tricks operatives were involved in what Ms Tame described as a “bike stack” but Mr Joyce, noting no doubt that Mr Morrison said only “forgive” and not “forget”, may be impressed by the coincidence.

Bike stacks are not rare: In 2014 Lindsay Lohan posted on Instagram: “A citibike gone wrong #notsoquiche !!!!”, documenting bruises and scrapes on her legs after a “bike stack” (on her 28th birthday) involving a New York City “Citi Bike” (a now privately owned public bicycle sharing system).  The photograph was taken in Soho, the following day.

Even if a coincidence Ms Tame’s bike stack was not an unusual event.  Although an admirable means of transportation (a bicycle is one of the most efficient means of getting from A to B in urban environments), there is a death and injury toll associated with the machines.  In 2021, 38 cyclists were killed in road-related incidents in Australia, a slight increase from the previous year in which there were 35 fatalities and the riders typically account for some 3% of all road deaths nationally.  Quite how many are injured each year isn’t known because many minor injuries are treated only with first-aid and those dealt with by GP (general practitioners or family doctors) don’t appear in aggregate statistics but data from hospital admissions record over 12,000 cyclists who were in 2021 treated for non-fatal injuries related to cycling accidents.  The most common injuries included fractures, head injuries and soft-tissue damage while a significant proportion of fatalities involved collisions with motor vehicles, especially on urban roads.

As Mr Joyce ponders coincidences, he might pause to reflect on the attitude of Jesus to hypocrisy, discussed in the Gospel of John.  The Pharisees, in an attempt to discredit Jesus, brought before him a woman they accused of adultery, reminding the crime was under Mosaic law punishable by stoning.

(3) And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

(4) They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

(5) Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

(6) This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

(7) So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

(9) And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

(10) When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

(11) She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

John 8 (King James Version (KJV 1611)

Given the enthusiasm Mr Joyce showed for defending the sanctity of the marriage vow during the debate about same-sex marriage before deserting his wife to co-habit with a former employee with whom he’d been conducting an adulterous affair, it may be time for him to read the bible rather than just thumping one.

Gladys Berejiklian looking at Scott Morrison.

What made the latest in Mr Joyce’s long line of gaffs funnier still was the release a few days earlier of text messages between former New South Wales premier Gladys Berejiklian (b 1970; Premier of NSW 2017-2021) and an un-named member of Mr Morrison’s cabinet in which Ms Berejiklian branded the prime minister a “horrible, horrible person” who was "untrustworthy" and “more concerned with politics than people”.  The minister proved responsive to the then premier’s analysis, describing his leader as “a fraud”, “a complete psycho” and “desperate and jealous.”  Perhaps a victim of Sinodinos syndrome, when asked, Ms Berejiklian said she couldn't recall of the exchange.

Spirit of forgiveness: The prime-minister washes and conditions his deputy’s hair (digitally altered image).

As soon as this scurrilous texting was revealed, Mr Joyce affected outrage that anyone would do such a thing, condemning the anonymous minister and demanding they reveal their identity.  I would suggest that if you know anything about this don’t wait to be outed”, Mr Joyce told the media.  He also had practical advice, adding “…and give an explanation.  Maybe it was a bad day in the office, I don’t know. That’s a better way to do it. It getting out is one good rump steak, with horseradish sauce, vegetables and chips, two bottles of red wine, and some journo is going to say ‘You know who told me that? Blah blah blah.’ And she’s out.”  That may yet prove sound advice.  Most revealing perhaps was (1) the admission by the journalist who provided the leak that the ministerial author had on two prior occasions over the last year refused to authorize a public release of the text, dropping the embargo only to permit a release on 1 February 2022 and (2) the journalist writes for the Murdoch press.  Politicians’ motives for doing things always attract interest (when being told of the Belgium ambassador’s death, Talleyrand mused “I wonder what his motive was?”) and there’s been much speculation, most of it pondering which minister would gain most to gain from the messages entering the public domain.

Former NSW premier Bob Carr (b 1947; Premier of NSW 1995-2005, foreign minister 2012-2013 (@bobjcarr)), anxious to help, tweeted:

The minister who shared the text with van Onselen and gave permission to use it was Peter Dutton. If PM Morrison has one more week in free fall the prospect of a leadership change pre-election is real.  Party rules don’t count if most MPs think you will lead them to defeat.

Mr Dutton (b 1970; member of cabinet since 2013) responded by tweeting “Bob Carr’s tweet is baseless, untrue and should be deleted” but Mr Carr declined, instead adding “Only one way Peter Dutton can win his case: get another colleague to admit that they were the source for comments about the Prime Minister.  If not you, Mr Dutton, which of your colleagues? Until then who has most to gain from undermining further a flailing PM?”

In happier times: Liberal-National Party billboard for the 2016 election campaign.

Given Ms Berejiklian and Mr Dutton sat in different parliaments, hailed from different states and belonged to different factions, it does seem strange he might be the suspect texter but few things in politics unite like a mutual loathing.  Mr Carr offered no evidence for his claim and seemed unconcerned the notably litigious Mr Dutton might issue a writ.  The former foreign minister said that, like a journalist, he wouldn’t be revealing his sources but did indicate the tip came from a normally reliable source and was not supposition based on Mr Dutton having “a bit of previous”.  Mr Dutton's texting history included sending one calling a journalist a "mad fucking witch".  Unfortunately he sent the text to the target of his remarks but fortunately she worked for the Murdoch press and thus had to cop it sweet which the witch did with some aplomb, even complimenting Mr Dutton for having been a minister who had made a great contribution to government.  The conspiracy theory which underpins Mr Carr's tweet is the notion that in 2018 Mr Morrison tricked Mr Dutton into triggering the defenestration of Malcolm Turnbull (b 1954; prime-minister of Australia 2015-2018) and then double-crossed him, securing the numbers and The Lodge for himself.  Not quite Fortinbras in Hamlet but an anyway successful venture.  Interestingly, despite many opportunities, Mr Dutton has never denied being a Freemason.

Peter Dutton looking at Scott Morrison.

Amidst the Sturm und Drang which has raged since the text messages emerged, what’s not been discussed is the desirability of characteristics such as hypocrisy, having more interest in politics than people and being an actual psychopath in a prime-minister.  Being a hypocrite in its original meaning in Ancient Greek (an actor; one playing a part) is so obvious a helpful attribute for a political leader that Ronald Reagan (1911-2004 US President 1981-1989) was probably genuinely surprised at the journalistic naiveté when, during the 1980 presidential election campaign, he was asked if was possible for an actor to be good president.  His rely was “How is it possible for a good president not to be an actor?” and his point was well made and Harold Macmillan (1894-1986, UK prime-minister 1957-1963) was habitually referred to as an “actor-manager”.  Being, in its modern sense, a hypocrite, liar and psychopath might sound less promising qualifications for political leadership and for idealists something truly appalling and it may be these qualities are more valuable in attaining office than exercising successfully its power although there’s always the extraordinary example of Comrade Stalin (1878-1853; leader of the USSR 1924-1953) to illustrate just what a serious psychopath can achieve.

Another fun aspect of these text messages is that the conflict is internecine.  Politicians being mean to those on the other side is so common it barely rates as news unless there’s some particularly egregious accusation, preferably involving a goat or some other abomination but when it’s within the same party, it’s especially amusing because that’s where the real hatreds lie.  That’s why Gordon Brown (b 1951; UK prime-minister 2007-2010) being was labeled “a psychopath” by Tony Blair (b 1953; UK prime-minister 1997-2007) was funny; had he said it of the leader of the opposition it’s doubtful anyone would have noticed.  Mr Joyce’s contribution to the genre was really quite good as was that of Mr Dutton (or whomever the culprit may be) but that of Ms Berejiklian lacked punch; she needs to sharpen the hatchet.

Thursday, May 7, 2020

Gate

Gate (pronunced geyt)

(1) A movable barrier, usually on hinges, closing an opening in a fence, wall, or other enclosure.

(2) An opening permitting passage through an enclosure.

(3) A tower, architectural setting, etc., for defending or adorning such an opening or for providing a monumental entrance to a street, park etc.

(4) Any means of access or entrance.

(5) A mountain pass.

(6) Any movable barrier, as at a tollbooth or a road or railroad crossing.

(7) A sliding barrier for regulating the passage of water, steam, or the like, as in a dam or pipe; valve.

(8) In skiing, an obstacle in a slalom race, consisting of two upright poles anchored in the snow a certain distance apart.

(9) The total number of persons who pay for admission to an athletic contest, a performance, an exhibition or the total revenue from such admissions.

(10) In cell biology, a temporary channel in a cell membrane through which substances diffuse into or out of a cell; in flow cytometry, a line separating particle type-clusters on two-dimensional dot plots.

(11) A sash or frame for a saw or gang of saws.

(12) In metallurgy, (1) a channel or opening in a mold through which molten metal is poured into the mold cavity (also called ingate) or (2), the waste metal left in such a channel after hardening; (written also as geat and git).

(13) In electronics, a signal that makes an electronic circuit operative or inoperative either for a certain time interval or until another signal is received, also called logic gate; a circuit with one output that is activated only by certain combinations of two or more inputs.

(14) In historic British university use, to punish by confining to the college grounds (largely archaic).

(15) In Scots and northern English use, a habitual manner or way of acting (largely archaic).

(16) A path (largely archaic but endures in historic references).

(17) As a suffix (-gate), a combining form extracted from Watergate, occurring as the final element in journalistic coinages, usually nonce words, that name scandals resulting from concealed crime or other alleged improprieties in government or business.

(18) In cricket, the gap between a batsman's bat and pad, used usually as “bowled through the gate”.

(19) In computing and electronics, a logical pathway made up of switches which turn on or off; the controlling terminal of a field effect transistor (FET).

(20) In airport or seaport design, a (usually numerically differentiated) passageway or assembly point with a physical door or gate through which passengers embark or disembark.

(21) In a lock tumbler, the opening for the stump of the bolt to pass through or into.

(22) In pre-digital cinematography, a mechanism, in a film camera and projector, that holds each frame momentarily stationary behind the aperture.

(23) A tally mark consisting of four vertical bars crossed by a diagonal, representing a count of five.

Pre 900:  From the Middle English gate, gat, ȝate & ȝeat, from the Old English gæt, gat & ġeat (a gate, door), from the Proto-Germanic gatą (hole, opening).  It was cognate with the Low German and Dutch gat (hole or breach), the Low German Gatt, gat & Gööt, the Old Norse gata (path) and was related to the Old High German gazza (road, street).  Yate was a dialectical form which was an alternative spelling until the seventeenth century; the plural is gates.  Many European languages picked up variations of the Old Norse to describe both paths and what is now understood as a gate.  The Old English geat (plural geatu) was used to mean "gate, door, opening, passage, hinged framework barrier", as was Proto-Germanic gatan, and the Dutch gat; in Modern German, it emerged as gasse meaning “street”; the Finnish katu, and the Lettish gatua (street) are Germanic loan-words.  Interestingly, scholars trace the ultimate source as the Primitive European ǵed (to defecate).

The meaning "money from selling tickets" dates from 1896, a contraction of 1820’s gate-money.  The first reference to uninvited gate-crashers is from 1927 and gated community appears in 1989; that was Emerald Bay, Laguna Beach, California although conceptually similar defensive structures had for millennia been built in many places.

G Gordon Liddy (1930–2021) was the CREEP lawyer convicted of conspiracy, burglary, and illegal wiretapping for his role in the Watergate Affair.  Receiving a twenty-year sentence, he served over four, paroled after Jimmy Carter (b 1924; US President 1977-1981) commuted the term to eight years.  He was one of the great characters of the affair.

The practice of using -gate as a suffix appended to a word to indicate a "scandal involving," is a use abstracted from Watergate, the building complex in Washington DC, which, in 1972, housed the national headquarters of the Democratic Party.  On 17 June, it was burgled by operatives found later to be associated with Richard Nixon's (1913-1994; US president 1969-1974) Campaign to Re-elect the President committee (CREEP).  Since Watergate, there have been at least dozens of –gates.

Notable Post-Watergate Gates

Billygate: In 1980, US President Jimmy Carter's brother, Billy (1937-1988), was found to have represented the Libyan government as a foreign agent.  Cynics noted that, unlike his brother, Billy at least had a foreign policy.

Crooked Hillary Clinton (b 1947; US secretary of state 2009-2013) has provided the lexicon many "-gates".  A marvelous linguistic coincidence gave us Whitewatergate, a confusing package of real estate deals later found technically to be lawful and Futuregate was a reference to some still inexplicable (and profitable) dabbles in her name in the futures markets.  Servergate was the mail server affair which featured mutually contradictory defenses to various allegations, the Benghazi affair and more.  There was also a minor matter but one which remains emblematic of character.  Crooked Hillary Clinton, after years of fudging, was forced to admit she “misspoke” when claiming that to avoid sniper-fire, she and her entourage “…just ran with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our base” when landing at a Bosnian airport in 1996.  She admitted she “misspoke” only after a video was released of her walking down the airplane’s stairs to be greeted by a little girl who presented her with a bouquet of flowers.  Even her admission was constructed with weasel words: “…if I misspoke, that was just a misstatement”.  That seemed to clear things up and the matter is now recorded in the long history of crooked Hillary Clinton's untruthfulness as Snipergate.  Most bizarre was Pizzagate, a conspiracy theory that circulated during the 2016 US presidential campaign, sparked by WikiLeaks publishing a tranche of emails from within the Democrat Party machine.  According to some, encoded in the text of the emails was a series of messages between highly-placed members of the party who were involved in a pedophile ring, even detailing crooked Hillary Clinton’s part in the ritualistic sexual abuse of children in the basement of a certain pizzeria in Washington DC.  Among the Hillarygates, pizzagate was unusual in that she was innocent of every allegation made; not even the pizzeria's basement existed.

Closetgate: References the controversy following the 2005 South Park episode "Trapped in the Closet", a parody of the Church of Scientology in which the Scientologist film star Tom Cruise (b 1962) refuses to come out of a closet.  Not discouraged by the threat of writs, South Park later featured an episode in which the actor worked in a confectionery factory packing fudge. 

Grangegate: In Australia in 2014, while giving evidence to the state's Independent Commission against Corruption (ICAC), Barry O'Farrell (b 1959; Premier of New South Wales 2011-2014) forget he’d been given a Aus$3,000 bottle of Penfolds Grange (which he drank without disclosing the gift as the rules required).  He felt compelled to resign.

Perhaps counterintuitively, there seems never to have been a Lindsaygate or LohangateIn that sense, Lindsay Lohan may be said to have lived a scandal-free life.

Irangate: Sometimes called contragate, this was the big scandal of Ronald Reagan's (1911-2004; US president 1981-1989) second term.  As a back channel operation, the administration had sold weapons to the Islamic Republic of Iran and diverted the profits to fund the Contra rebels opposing the Sandinista government of Nicaragua.  Congress had earlier cut the funding.

Nipplegate: Sometimes called boobgate, this was a reaction to singer Janet Jackson’s (b 1966) description of what happened at the conclusion of her 2004 Superbowl performance as a “wardrobe malfunction”.  In Europe, they just didn't get what all the fuss was about.

Monicagate: The most celebrated scandal of President Bill Clinton’s (b 1946; US President 1993-2001) second term.  Named after White House intern Monica Lewinsky (b 1973), with whom the president “…did not have sexual relations…”.

1973 Pontiac Trans-Am SD 455.

Dieselgate: In 2015, Volkswagen was caught cheating on emissions tests used to certify for sale some eleven-million VW diesel vehicles by programming them to enable emissions controls during testing, but not during real-world driving.  Manufacturers had been known to do this.  In 1973 Pontiac tried to certify their 455 Super Duty  engine with a not dissimilar trick but the Environmental Protection Authority (EPA) weren’t fooled which is why the production 455SD was rated at 290 horsepower rather than 310.  Later, manufacturers in the Fourth Reich turned out to be just as guilty and, in that handy phrase from German historiography "they all knew".  Including the fines thus far levied, legal fees and the costs associated with product recalls, the affair is estimated so far to have cost VW some US$27 billion but the full accounting won't be complete for some time.  Other German manufacturers were also affected but Daimler (maker of Mercedes-Benz) avoided a penalty by snitching on the others. 

In Australia, Utegate was a 2009 campaign run by opposition leader Malcolm Turnbull (b 1954; prime-minister of Australia 2015-2018) and his then (they're no longer on speaking terms) henchman, Eric Abetz (b 1958, Liberal Party senator for Tasmania, Australia 1994-2022), which accused Dr Kevin Rudd (b 1957; Australian prime-minister 2007-2010 & 2013) of receiving a backhander from a car dealer, the matters in question revolving around an old and battered ute (pick-up).  Based on documents forged by Treasury official Godwin Grech (b 1967), it led to the (first) downfall of Turnbull.  Abetz went on to bigger things but Turnbull neither forgot nor forgave, sacking Abetz during his second coming (which started well but ended badly).  Abetz however proved he still has the numbers which matter, gaining preselection and in 2024 winning a seat in the Tasmanian Legislative Assembly (the state's lower house).  He now serves as minister for business, industry & resources and minister for transport as well as leader of the house in the minority Liberal Party government.  

The first Nutellagate arose at Columbia University early in 2013 with allegations of organized, large-scale theft by students of the Nutella provided in the dining halls. Apparently students, unable to resist the temptation of the newly available nutty spread, were (1) consuming vast quantities, (2) pilfering it using containers secreted in back-packs and (3) actually purloining entire jars from the tables.

In the spirit of the investigative journalism which ultimately brought down President Nixon, the Columbia Daily Spectator, breaking the story, reported that, based on a leak from their deep throat in the catering department, the crime was costing some US$5,000 per week, the hungry students said ravenously to be munching their way through around 100 pounds (37 or 45 KG (deep throat not specific whether the losses were weighed on the avoirdupois or troy scale)) of Nutella every seven days.  The newspaper noted the heist was on such a scale that, unless addressed, the cost to the university would be US$250,000 a year, enough to buy seven jars for every undergraduate student.

The national media picked up the story noting, apart from the criminality, there were concerns about the relationship between the wastage of food, excessively expensive student services, the exorbitant cost of tuition fees and a rampant consumer culture.  It seemed a minor moral panic might ensue until the student newspaper (now a blog) deconstructed the Spectator’s numbers and worked out the caterers must be paying 70% more for Nutella than that quoted by local wholesalers, casting some doubt on the matter.  The university authorities responded within days, issuing a press release headed “Nutellagate Exposed: It's a Smear!"  Their audit revealed that the accounting system had booked US$2,500 against Nutella purchases in the first week of term but that was the usual practice when stocking inventory and that consumption was around the budgeted US$450 in subsequent weeks.  Deep throat (Nutella edition) lost face and was discredited.

Nutellagate II broke in 2017 when a consumer protection organization released a report noting the recipe had, without warning, been changed, the spread now having more sugar and milk powder but less cocoa and, as a result, was now of a lighter hue.  Ferrero’s crisis-management operative responded on twitter, tweeting “our recipe underwent a fine-tuning and continues to deliver the Nutella fans know and love with high quality ingredients,”… adding “…sugar, like other ingredients, can be enjoyed in moderation as part of a balanced diet.”

#Nutellagate soon trended and users expressed displeasure, many invoking the memory of New Coke or the IBM PS/2, two other products which appeared also to try to fix something not broken.  The twitterstorm soon subsided, the speculation being that, because it contained more sugar, consumers would become more addicted and soon forget the fuss.  So it proved, sales remaining strong.  Nutella though remains controversial because of the sugar content and the use of palm oil, a product harvested from vast monocultural plantations and associated with social and environmental damage.  Ferrero has now and again suggested they may be ceasing production but the user base has proved resistant although, recent movements in the hazelnut price may test the elasticity of demand.

Open-Gate Ferraris

The much admired but now almost extinct open-gate shifters were originally purely functional before becoming fetishized.  At a time when more primitive transmissions and shifter assemblies were built with linkages and cables which operated with much less precision than would come later, the open-gates served as a guidance mechanism, making the throws more uniform and ensuring the correct movement of the controlling lever.  Improvements in design actually made open-gates redundant decades ago but they'd become so associated with cars such as Ferraris and Lamborghinis that they'd become part of the expectations of many buyers and it wasn't hard to persuade the engineers to persist, even though the things had descended to be matters purely of style.  A gimmick they may have become but, cut from stainless steel and often secured with exposed screw-heads, they were among the coolest of nostalgia pieces.  

Reality eventually bit when modern, fast electronics meant automatic transmissions both shifted faster and were programmed always to change ratios at the optimal point and no driver however skilled could match that combination.  Once essential to quick, clear shifts, by the late 1990s, the open-gate had actually become a hindrance to the process and while there were a few who still relished the clicky, tactile experience, such folk were slowly dying off and with sales in rapid decline, manufacturers became increasingly unwilling to indulge them with what had become a low-volume, unprofitable option.  

Not all the Ferraris with manual gearboxes used the open-gate fitting, some of the grand-touring cars using concealing leather boots but both are now relics, the factory recently retiring the manual gearbox because of a lack of demand.  The 599 GTB Fiorano was made between 2006-2012 and included the option but of the 3200-odd made, only 30 buyers specified the manual.  That run of 30 was however mass-production compared with the California (2009-2014) which was both the first Ferrari equipped with a dual-clutch transmission and the last to offer a manual, ending the tradition of open gate-shifters which stretched back 65 years.  Testing the market, a six-speed manual option had been added to the hard-top convertible in 2010 and the market spoke, the factory dropping it from the order sheet in 2012 after selling just three cars in three years.  The rarity has however created collectables; on the rare occasions an open gate 599 or California is offered at auction, they attract quite a premium and there's now an after-market converting Ferraris to open gate manuals.  It's said to cost up to US$40,000 depending on the model and, predictably, the most highly regarded are those converted using "verified factory parts".

2012 Ferrari California (top) and 2012 Cadillac CTS-V sedan.

So the last decade at Maranello has been automatic (technically “automated manual transmission”) all the way and although a consequence of the quest for ultimate performance, it wasn’t anything dictatorial and had customer demand existed at a sustainable level, the factory would have continued to supply manual transmissions.  There is however an alternative, Cadillac since 2004 offering some models with manual transmission for the first time since the 1953 Series 75 (among the Cadillac crowd the Cimarron (1982-1988) is never spoken of except in the phrase "the unpleasantness of 1982" ) and by 2013, while one could buy a Cadillac with a clutch pedal, one could not buy such a Ferrari.  For most of the second half of the twentieth century, few would have thought that anything but improbable or unthinkable.

Ferrari open-gate shifter porn 

1965 250 LM

1967 330 GTC

1968 275 GTS/4 NART Spyder

1969 365 GTC

1972 365 GTB/4

1988 Testarossa

1991 Mondial-T Cabriolet

1994 348 Spider

2011 599 GTB Fiorano

2012 California