Badminton (pronounced bad-min-tn)
(1) A racquet
sport played on a rectangular (at competitive level, always indoor) two players
or two pairs of players equipped with light rackets used to volley a
shuttlecock over the high net dividing the court in half.
(2) A
drink made with a mix of claret, soda water and sugar (also as badminton cup).
(3) A small
village and civil parish in the south-west English county of Gloucestershire (initial
upper case).
(4) A
community in the Glyncoed area, Blaenau Gwent county borough, Wales, UK.
(4)
Among the young of Hong Kong, a euphemism for sexual congress.
1873-1874:
The game was named after Badminton House, the country seat of the dukes of
Beaufort in Gloucestershire (now associated with the annual Badminton horse
trials). The derived terms include badminton
court, badminton racquet and badminton ball.
The locality name was from the Old English Badimyncgtun (estate of (a man called) Baduhelm), which
deconstructs as the personal name Bad (possibly also found in the Frankish
Badon) + helm (from the Old English helma (helm, tiller)+ -ing (from the Middle English -ing, from the Old English –ing & -ung (in the sense of the modern -ing,
as a suffix forming nouns from verbs), from the Proto-West Germanic –ingu & -ungu, from the Proto-Germanic –ingō
& -ungō. It was cognate with the
Saterland Frisian -enge, the West
Frisian –ing, the Dutch –ing, The Low German –ing & -ink, the
German –ung, the Swedish -ing and the Icelandic –ing; All the cognate forms were used for
the same purpose as the English -ing)).+ -tun
(used here to refer to “a place”). Among
players in England, the sport is sometimes referred to with the slang
“badders”. Badminton & badmintonist
are nouns; the noun plural is plural badmintons.
Games using
shuttlecocks (the designs having variations but all using deliberately “anti-aerodynamic”
properties to dissipate the energy carried in flight) are known to have been
played for at least centuries across Eurasia, the attractions including the
game not putting a premium on physicality (women at comparatively little
disadvantage because the effect of fluid dynamics on the shuttlecock negated
much of the power of inherently stronger men) and there being no need for a truly
flat, prepared surface. The recognizably
modern game of badminton evolved in the early-mid nineteenth century and was
something of a cult under the Raj, played by expatriate British officers of the
Indian Army, both the polo crown and those unable to afford the upkeep of
ponies. It was a variant of the earlier
games “shuttlecock” and “battledore” (battledore an older term for “racquet”). The history of the sport’s early days is murky
and it’s not clear if the first games in England really were played at Badminton
House, the Duke of Beaufort’s country estate in 1873-1874 but it seems it was
from then the game spread. The
apparently inexplicable “badminton ball” (the game played with a shuttlecock)
is accounted for by the fame once being played using a soft, woolen ball and
called “ball badminton”.
Among the first players at Badminton House were soldiers returning from their service under the Raj and just as they took English habits and practices to India (for good and bad), upon returning they brought much from the Orient, including their sport. Under the Raj, it had been played outdoors and when it was wet or windy, the woollen ball was often used but the principle was essentially the same as the modern game except nets weren’t always used and there was sometimes no concept of a defined “court”, the parameters established by the players’ reach and capacity to return the shot from wherever the ball or shuttlecock was placed; what was constant was that if the shot hit the opponent’s ground, the point was won.
Under
the Raj, the game was known also as Poona or Poonah, named after the garrison
town of Poona (named thus in 1857 and changed to Pune in 1978 as part of the
process which restored the historic names of Chenni (Madras until 1996), Mumbai
(Bombay until 1996) etc). It was in
Poona where some of the most devoted players were stationed and there were
several layers of competition taken as seriously as polo tournaments; when
these offers returned to England, badminton clubs were soon established (mostly
in the south). The so called “Pune Rules”
(of which there were variations reflecting the regimental origins of the clubs)
were maintained until 1887 when the recently confederated Badminton Association
of England (BAE) codified a standard set which differ little from those of the
modern game. The All England Open
Badminton Championships for gentlemen's doubles, ladies' doubles, and mixed
doubles were first played in 1899 while singles competitions debuted in 1900
and an England–Ireland championship match was held in 1904. It first appeared in the Olympic Games as an “exhibition
sport” at Munich (1972) and has been in the regular programme since Seoul
(1988), the medal table dominated overwhelmingly by the PRC (People’s Republic
of China); only players from the PRC and Indonesia have every won Olympic gold.
Like many
aspects of the English language, euphemisms evolve or appear under all sorts of
influences. Some come from popular
culture (wardrobe malfunction) and some are an attempt deliberately to deceive (misspoke)
while others are a “curated creation” although not all succeed; Gretchen in
Mean Girls (2004) never quite managed to make “fetch” happen. Sometime, they can appear as that bugbear of
governments: the “unintended consequence”.
In August 2024, the Hong Kong Education Bureau published a 70-page sex
education document which, inter-alia, advised teen-aged Hong Kongers to delay
romantic relationships and “set limits on intimacy with the opposite gender”
(intra-gender intimacy wasn’t mentioned, presumably not because it’s regarded
as desirable but because the bureau though it unmentionable). Helpfully, the document included worksheets
(with tick-boxes) for adolescents and guidance for the teachers helping to educate
them on coping with sexual fantasies and the consequences of “acting on
impulses”. Easily the most
imaginative tactic the bureau advocated as part of its “abstinence strategy”
was that young folk should repress their teen-age sexual urges with “a game of
badminton”, a suggestion which drew criticism from experts and
lawmakers and derision from the public.
Nobody suggested playing badminton was a bad idea but the consensus was that
advocating it as an alternative behaviour for two horny teen-agers was “overly simplistic
and unrealistic”, the most common critique being the bureau was “out of touch”,
a phrase not infrequently directed towards the Hong Kong government generally.
Some
also questioned whether a 70 page booklet was the ideal information delivery
platform for the TLDR (too long, didn’t read) generation, brought up on TikTok’s
short, digestible chunks. Still, there
was certainly much information and helpful tips including a compulsory form for
couples in a “love
relationship” which contained a list of the parameters they could
use to “set
limits to their intimacy” and informed them these matters involved four
key subjects: (1) the relationship between love and sex, (2) the importance of
boundaries, (3) how to cope with sexual fantasies and impulses and
(4) the horrible
consequences and were one to act upon these impulses. The conclusion was strong” “Lovers who are
unable to cope with the consequences of premarital sex, such as unwed marital
pregnancy, legal consequences and emotional distress, should firmly refuse to
have sex before marriage.”
Sex can of course be transactional and even contractual and in that spirit
students were urged to “fill in and sign a commitment form to set limits on
intimacy” and to help with what young folk could find a difficult
clause to draft, the bureau suggested: “It is normal for people to have sexual fantasies and
desires, but we must recognise that we are the masters of our desires and
should think twice before acting, and control our desires instead of being
controlled by them.” Signing
that would presumably “kill the moment”
and the bureau assured its readers this would control their sexual impulses in
certain ways so they could promise to develop “self-discipline, self-control, and resistance to pornography”.
Nor
were external influences neglected, the bureau counselling adolescents that a
way to suppress their “natural sexual impulses” was to avoid media and
publications which “that might arouse them”, recommending instead
they “exercise
and indulge in distractions” which will help divert their attention
away from “undesirable
activities”. As everyone
knows, badminton is both good exercise and a desirable activity. Not only the sometimes decadent media was
seen as a threat; there was also the matter of one’s peers and one scenario the
bureau described was coming upon “a young couple in a park” exchanging caresses,
the correct reaction to which was to avoid temptation by “leaving the scene immediately” or
instead “enjoying
the sight of flowers and trees in the park”. Of greater relevance perhaps was the way to
handle the situation were a young man to find himself alone with his girlfriend
while “studying
at home”: “Leave the scene immediately; go out to play badminton
together in a sports hall.”
There was also sartorial advice for your scholars, the students to dress
appropriately and avoid wearing “sexy clothing” that could lead to “visual
stimulation.” Any ayatollah
would agree with that, wondering only why it took the Hong Kong government so
long to point it out. Whether the new
guidelines will be result in behavioral changes remains to be seen but the
document certainly stimulated responses from the meme-makers, one claiming the advocacy
for badminton as a contraceptive proved just how out of touch was the Hong Kong
government because it “obviously hasn’t caught up with the popularity of
pickleball.” However, the most obvious cultural
contribution was linguistic, phrases like: “want to try out my badminton racquet?” and “let’s play badminton” suggested as the latest euphemism
for acts of illicit sex.
“Fetch” never quite happened: Regina George (Rachel McAdams (b 1978)) shuts down Gretchen Wieners (Lacey Chabert (b 1982)), Mean Girls (2004). Thanks to the government of Hong Kong, “Badminton” may yet happen.
In
fairness to the Hong Kong government, it’s not unique in its ineptitude in talking
to the young about sex. Their messaging
was however at least clear and unambiguous unlike that in the Australian
government’s infamous “milkshake” advertising campaign in 2021. That was about the matter of “consent to have
sex”, a matter of some significance given the frequency of it being the central
contested issue in many rape cases so it was an important thing to discuss but
unfortunately, all that was agreed was it was embarrassingly dumbed-down and a puerile
attempt at humor. Within days the
milkshake video was withdrawn from the Aus$3.7 million campaign. About the same time the mystifying milkshake
video was making children laugh, Mick Fuller (b 1968; commissioner of the New
South Wales (NSW) Police Force 2017-2022) proved one didn’t have to be a boomer
to be out of touch with the early twenty-first century. Mr Fuller, noting no doubt the fondness the
young folk showed towards their smartphones, suggested an app would be answer,
as it seems to be to just about every other problem (“there’s an app for that”).
Deconstructed, that would seem to require both parties logging into the
app (hopefully having it already installed) and in some way authorizing sexual
activity with the other. For security
reasons, 2FA (two-factor authentication) would obviously be a necessity so it
would be doable, only delaying rather than killing the moment. Still, it didn’t sound like something which
would soar to the top of App Store charts and while Mr Fuller argued such a tool
could be used “to
keep matters out of the justice system”, he did concede it might be
a “ “terrible”
suggestion and “the
worst idea I have all year.”.
The Badminton Cup cocktail
Ingredients
Strips
of peel from a ½ cucumber
¼ cup
plus 2 tablespoons of superfine sugar
Pinch
of freshly grated nutmeg
One
750-ml bottle dry red wine (ideally a Bordeaux (Claret))
16
ounces chilled soda water
Ice,
preferably 1 large block
Instructions
(1) In
a small punch bowl, combine the cucumber peel, sugar and nutmeg.
(2) Add
wine, stirring until the sugar dissolves.
(3) Refrigerate
until chilled (will typically take some two hours).
(4) Stir
in the soda water, add ice and serve.
The Badminton Beltie Cocktail
The Badminton cup is a classic summer cocktail designed to refresh on a hot day. However, English summers, though now noticeably
hotter than in decades past, can be unpredictable and there will be cold
days. In such weather, the Badminton beltie
is a better choice than a badminton cup, the sour fruitiness of the raspberry whisky
said to combine with the sweet smoothness of the spiced rum to create a “belter
of a drink”. It was created during the unseasonably
cold and wet week of the 2023 Badminton Horse Trials.
Ingredients
2
measures spiced rum liqueur (20%)
2
measures raspberry whisky liqueur (18%)
Crushed
Ice
Instructions
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