Poop

Poop (pronounced poop)

(1) In naval architecture, as “poop deck”, a structure at the stern of a vessel.

(2) In nautical jargon, (1) as of a wave, to break over the stern of a ship or (2) to take to take seas over the stern (especially repeatedly).

(3) As “pooped”, a slang term expressing exhaustion or fatigue; has been used as a noun in this context as “an old poop”.

(4) As “pooped out”, a slang term applied usually to machinery which has failed.

(5) As “poop sheet”, military slang for information updates circulated on paper; later adopted as “get the real poop” (get the true facts on something).

(6) As a noun, excrement; as a verb, the act of defecation, both described by most dictionaries as informal and often childish; also recorded as a child’s expression of disappointment; was also used as a euphemism for flatulence, apparently as a more polite replacement for the earlier fart. 

(7) As “party pooper”, a stupid, fussy, or boring person.

(8) As onomatopoeia, to make a short blast on a horn.

Circa 1350: Origin uncertain but possibly from the Middle English powpen, popen & poupen (to make a gulping sound while drinking, blow on a horn, toot) and perhaps influenced by the Dutch poepen (to defecate) and the Low German pupen (to fart; to break wind”); the English adoption of the latter sense dating from 1735–1745.  The sense of information began as the US Army slang “poop sheet” to refer to anything on paper, distributed by the authorities, one of many ways soldiers had to disparage military intelligence, this one comparing official documents to toilet paper, presumably used.  The sense of “information collated on paper” continued in US journalism circles as “get the poop” in the post-war years but was later displaced by other slang as technology changed.  “Party pooper” was first recorded in 1910–1915 which some suggest is derived from nincompoop but not all etymologists are convinced.  The sense from which the poop desk of ships evolved happened independently, although in parallel with, the various onomatopoeic meanings.  Dating from 1375-1425, it was from the Middle English poupe & pope, from the Old French pope, poupe & pouppe, from the Italian poppa, from the Vulgar Latin puppa, from the Classical Latin puppis, all meaning “stern of a ship”.  All alternative spellings are long obsolete.  Poop & pooping are nouns & verbs and pooped is a verb & adjective; the noun plural is poops. 

A costal carpet python pooping.

In humans and other animals, although the general principle remains (if not exactly accurately) “What goes in, must come out”, there are a number of variables involved in the parameters of poop production, most obviously diet.  This coastal carpet python was seen on the Sunshine Coast in the state of Queensland, Australia and experts in such things commented there was nothing unusual in the behavior.  As they explained: “Carpet pythons will usually eat one big meal, such as a possum”, the meal lasting “...a while as slowly it's digested..." whereas “...smaller snakes, like tiger snakes, eat smaller prey like frogs.  So they will relieve themselves more regularly and with smaller stools.”  Ophiologists (those dedicated to the study of snakes) note also that there's not of necessity any direct correlation between the size of a snake and the volume of their poop, factors such as diet, climate and age all influencing the outcome and observational studies in zoos have concluded that some snakes seem simply to prefer to poop more often than others.  Now we know.

Poop porn: A scorpion taking a poop. 

The Poop Deck

Schematic of a sailing ship hull.

In naval architecture, a poop deck is a deck which forms the roof of a cabin or other enclosure built in the aft (rear) of a ship’s superstructure.  On larger vessels, the cabin was usually called either the “poop cabin” or “navigation cabin”. The significance of the poop desk is that it was from here the ship was sailed; it was for centuries the highest point of a ship’s main structure and so offered the best visibility.  The captain or officer of the watch would from the poop desk instruct the helmsman how to steer with the rudder and relay instructions to those trimming the sails, to change both speed and direction.  The helmsman turned the rudder using a big wheel mounted on the quarter deck, adjacent to and within earshot of the captain on the poop deck.  The placement of poop and quarter decks was dictated by the need for the wheel to be directly above the rudder’s controls because there was no electronic or hydraulic assistance; movements of the wheel purely mechanical, acting on the rudder through a system of ropes and pulleys so distances between the two had to be kept as short as possible.

A stylized representation of a carrack or gallon of the sixteenth-seventeenth centuries.

On modern, motorized ships, the navigational functions once directed from the poop deck have been moved to the bridge, usually located towards the bow (front) although in many cargo vessels (bulk carriers, tankers, container ships etc) the infrastructure is constructed close to the stern (back) to because this optimizes the architecture for load-carrying (loading & unloading as well as capacity).  Poop desks still exist on some naval and commercial vessels and not merely as terms of naval architecture because the space has been re-purposed.  On larger pleasure craft (such as the big yachts billionaires like), poop decks variously are allocated as viewing areas (sometimes with a diving platform), entertainment spaces or a helicopter pad.  On such vessels, many Instagram shots are now taken on poop decks.

The USN's (US Navy) USS Gerald R. Ford.

Laid down in 2009 and commissioned in 2017, she was the lead ship in the Gerald R. Ford class and although a second is scheduled to be launched in 2027, whether the planned series of ten will ever be completed is uncertain because the advances in autonomous underwater and aerial warfare have been such that a school of thought now exists among the navalists that the big ships may become so vulnerable (the factor which doomed the battleship, the last launched in 1946) the programme will need to be re-assessed.  Visually, the most obvious innovation on the Gerald R. Ford was locating the island closer to aft.

One exception to bridge placement is the modern aircraft carrier.  Although in the concept of naval aviation was explored even before World War I (1914-1918), it was in the 1920s dedicated vessels began to be launched and these set the template (a flat, flush flight-deck with the bridge and other superstructure to one side and centralized) which is used still although decks are often no longer always wholly flat.  On carriers, that control superstructure is called the “island” and while some early designs by British and Japanese naval architects featured unconventional arrangements (including port-side or multiple islands), what emerged as a convention was the long-standardized starboard (right-hand side) configuration, something dictated by it best reconciling the competing demands of deck operations, aerodynamics and “human factors”.  Because carrier-based aviators have been trained to almost always fly a left-hand circuit when recovering, they approach the ship from the port (left-hand side) side and land along an angled deck offset to port.

Lindsay Lohan on the poop deck of a yacht cruising of the coast of Sardinia, July 2016.

By placing the island to starboard side, it’s kept from a aviator’s line of sight during the most critical phase (the final approach) and the reduces visual clutter which can lead to a perception of obstacles on the landing side.  The need to optimize visibility should not be underestimated because landings sometimes have to be undertaken on pitching, rolling decks so efficient geometry matters.  Movement at sea and prevailing winds can also create turbulent air behind an island (the so-called “air-wake”) and locating it on the starboard side minimises the intrusion of the worst of the disturbed airflow away from the port-side angled landing area; even more than deck movement, stable air is most critical for safe recoveries.  The most significant aspect of the “human factor” is that a standardized layout permits standardised procedures for deck operations (taxiing, aircraft spotting, crew placement during take-offs & landings etc) so people moving from one carrier to another will know the locations of obstructions, control points, “safe lanes” and such.