Crook

Crook (pronounced krook)

(1) A bent or curved implement, piece, appendage, etc; hook.

(2) The hooked part of anything.

(3) An instrument or implement having a bent or curved part, as a shepherd's staff hooked at one end or the crosier of a bishop or abbot.

(4) A bend or curve; a bent or curved part; a curving piece or portion of something).

(5) In slang, a person who steals, lies, cheats or does other dishonest or illegal things; a criminal; to steal, cheat, or swindle; an artifice; a trick; a contrivance.

(6) To bend; curve; a bend or curve.

(7) In slang, sick; unwell; feeble (Australia & New Zealand).

(8) In slang, out of order; functioning improperly; unsatisfactory; disappointing (Australia & New Zealand).

(9) In etiquette (as “to crook the knee”), a bending of the knee; a genuflection.

(10) A lock or curl of hair (obsolete).

(11) In structural engineering, a support beam consisting of a post with a cross-beam resting upon it; a bracket or truss consisting of a vertical piece, a horizontal piece, and a strut.

(12) A specialized staff with a semi-circular bend (called “the hook”) at one end and used by shepherds to control their flocks (a small scale version of which (as the pothook) is used in cooking to suspend a pot over a heat-source.  The spellings pot hook & pot-hook also appear in in modern use.  As a structural component of handwriting, a glyph in the shape is also called a pothook.

(13) In the traditional Christian churches, a bishop's standard staff of office, the shape of which emulates those historically used by shepherds, an allusion to the idea of Christ’s relationship to his followers as that of “a shepherd of his flock”, mentions in several passages in scripture including John 10:11 (I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep) and Psalm 23:1 (The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want).

(14) In music, a small tube, usually curved, applied to a trumpet, horn etc to change its pitch or key.

1125-1175: From the Middle English croke & crok (hook-shaped instrument or weapon; tool or utensil consisting of or having as an essential component a hook or curved piece of metal), from the Old English crōc (hook, bend, crook (although the very existence of crōc in Old English is contested by some), from the Proto-Germanic krōkaz (bend, hook), from the primitive Indo-European greg- (tracery, basket, bend).  It was cognate with Old Norse krokr & krāka (hook), the Dutch kreuk (a bend, fold; wrinkle), the Middle Low German kroke & krake (fold, wrinkle), the Danish krog (crook, hook), the Swedish krok (crook, hook), the Icelandic krókur (hook) and the Old High German krācho (hooked tool).    Crook is a noun, verb & adjective, crooks is a verb; crooked is a verb & adjective, crooking is a noun & verb, crooker & crookest are adjectives, crookedly is a adverb and crookedness is a noun; the noun plural is crooks.

Lindsay Lohan with crooked Harvey Weinstein (b 1952).

Crooked (bent, curved, in a bent shape) emerged in the early thirteenth century, the past-participle adjective from the verb crook and the figurative sense of “dishonest, false, treacherous, not straight in conduct; To turn from the path of rectitude; to pervert; to misapply; to twist” was from the same era, the familiar synonyms including rogue, villain, swindler, racketeer, scoundrel, robber, cheat, shyster, knave, pilferer and shark.  In that sense it was from the Middle English crooken, croken & crokien, from the Old English crōcian, from the Proto-West Germanic krōkōn (to bend, wrinkle) and was developed from the noun.  It was cognate with the Dutch kreuken (to crease, rumple) and the German Low German kröken (to bend, offend, suppress).

Leading the flock: Cardinal George Pell (1941-2023) with his bishop's crook.  The church's rituals vie with the Eurovison Song Contest and the Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras for having the most variety in the costuming.

The use in the slang of Australia, New Zealand emerged in the nineteenth century and was use variously to convey (1) something or the conduct of someone held to be unsatisfactory or not up to standard, (2) feeling ill or (3) annoyed, angry; upset (as in “to be crook about” or “to go crook at”), the comparative being crooker, the superlative crookest.  The sense of “a swindler” was a creation of late nineteenth century US English and developed from the earlier figurative use as “dishonest, crooked in conduct”, documented since at least the early 1700s, these notions ultimately derived from the use of crook in Middle English to describe a “dishonest trick”, a form prevalent in waring against the means to which the Devil would resort to tempt.  In idiomatic use, “arm in crook” describes two people walking arm-in-arm (ie the arms linked in the crook of the elbow) and “by hook or by crook” means “by any means necessary” although the exact original sense of this has long been a puzzle.

In the White House, crooked Hillary was the gift which just kept giving.

Clockwise from left: Ronald Reagan (1911-2004; US president 1981-1989), Walter Cronkite (1916–2009; CBS Evening News Anchor 1962-1981), James Brady (1940–2014; White House Press Secretary 1981-1989), David Gergen (b 1942; US political operative), Ed Meese (b 1931, US attorney-general 1985–1988), George HW Bush (George XLI, 1924-2018; US president 1989-1993), James Baker (b 1930; US secretary of state 1989-1992) and Burton "bud" Benjamin (1917–1988; CBS News executive 1957-1982) (the White House, 1981, left) and Ronald Reagan recalls the moment with Bill Clinton (b 1946; US president 1993-2001) (the White House, 1992, right).

Crooked Hillary Clinton (b 1947; US secretary of state 2009-2013) gained, however unhappily, the most memorable of the monikers Donald Trump (b 1946; US president 2017-2021 & since 2025) applied so effectively in his campaigns first to secure the Republican nomination and then win the 2016 presidential election.  It was a novel approach to electioneering but there had before been crookedness in the oval office, some of the conduct in the nineteen century truly scandalous and one of Richard Nixon's (1913-1994; US president 1969-1974) not unjustified complaints about life was he and his administration being subject to a level of scrutiny never inflicted on his (Democratic Party) predecessors.  That was illustrated during one of Nixon’s few happy moments during the Watergate scandal when on 26 September 1973 when his speechwriter Pat Buchanan (b 1938) appeared before a congressional committee investigating the manner.  The committee had taken some delight in conducting lengthy sessions during which various Republican Party figures were questioned but as Buchanan produced the facts and figures documenting decades of dirty tricks and actual illegalities by successive Democrat administrations, committee counsel Sam Dash (1925–2004) got him “…off the stand as quickly as possible”.  So crooked Hillary was part of a long political tradition and the label stuck so well to her because it according with the perceptions of many although, in fairness, there were plenty who’d done worse and suffered less. Presumably, crooked Hillary watched with interest to see if any branch of the US justice system succeeded in declaring Donald Trump crooked and she must have been disappointed that although able to be labelled a "convicted felon", the offence related only to a relatively minor matter connected with hush money paid to porn star Stormy Daniels (stage name of Stephanie Gregory, b 1979). One way on another, she could be waiting for some time.

Warren Harding (1865–1923, US president 1921-1923).

Unfairly or not, Warren Harding is now often called crooked, primarily because of the link with the "Teapot Dome" (the name from a geological feature and the affair would these days be called "Teapotdomegate") scandal which occurred under his administration but he wasn’t personally implicated.  However, Teapot Dome was one of many scandals on his watch so his reputation suffered.  Harding was aware he was betrayed by many of the friends and cronies he'd appointed to high office, in 1923 telling one associate: "I have no trouble with my enemies... but my damn friends, my God-damn friends... they're the ones that keep me walking the floor nights!"  He dropped dead while still in office, probably a good career move though such was the mood in Washington DC that rumors circulated his wife had poisoned him so he'd not have to endure more revelations about the sleaze and corruption in his administration.  While it's never been suggested Harding's own fingers were "in the till", he can't escape for the crookedness which occurred under what should have been his gaze.  Soon after becoming president, he lamented: "I am not fit for this office and should never have been here.  I am a man of limited talents from a small town .  I don't seem to grasp that I am president.  I know how far from greatness I am."  It was an unusual admission from a politician but the real problem was how far he was from even a mediocre adequacy.  In a sense it was not his fault because the Republican Party machine, unable to organize the numbers for any of the second-rate field seeking the nomination for 1920, settled on Harding as a "third-rate compromise".  His nomination was thrashed out in "smoke-filled rooms" (then literally that) and the country got exactly what the party had paid for; Theodore Roosevelt’s (TR, 1858–1919; US president 1901-1909) feisty daughter (Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884–1980)) summed him up better than most political scientists: “Harding was not a bad man. He was just a slob.”.

Richard Nixon & Lyndon Johnson (LBJ, 1908–1973, US president 1963-1969), the White House, 1968.

The 1964 US presidential election in which the candidates were the incumbent Democrat Lyndon Johnson and the Republican Barry Goldwater (1909-1998) was characterized as a contest between “a crook and a kook”, "crooked old Lyndon" notorious for his dubious business and political dealings in Texas and "crazy old Barry", probably unfairly, characterised by his opponents as, from time-to time, unhinged.  The electorate was apparently sanguine about the character traits of the two and, given the choice on election day, voted for the crook, LBJ enjoying one of the biggest electoral landslides in history although his presidency would end badly; consumed by the war in Vietnam, he didn't seek to again run in the 1968 which saw Richard Nixon win in what was the country's most improbable comeback from political adversity until Donald Trump's victory in 2024.

Richard Nixon with Checkers the dog (1952-1964), Washington DC, 1959.  Sometime during the Watergate scandal (if not before) Nixon may have reflected on the remark attributed to Frederick the Great (Frederick II (1712–1786, Prussian king 1740-1786) ): "The more I know of the character of men, the more I appreciate the company of dogs".

Already a national figure for this and that, Richard Nixon added to his notoriety by denying crookedness in his "Checkers speech", made in 1952, rejecting allegations of impropriety which had threatened his place on the Republican ticket as General Dwight Eisenhower’s (1890–1969, US president 1953-1961) running mate in that year’s election.  Though at the time criticised by sophisticates unimpressed by the maudlin, soap opera tone (Franklin Delano Roosevelt (FDR, 1882–1945, US president 1933-1945) had in 1944 used his dog Fala in a speech but he'd played it for laughs), among the public the “Checkers speech” worked and Nixon’s political career survived but two decades later, another speech with the same purpose failed to hold back the Watergate tide.  Held in Florida’s Disney's Contemporary Resort, it was at the 1973 press conference Nixon declared “…in all of my years of public life I have never obstructed justice... People have got to know whether or not their president is a crook. Well, I'm not a crook.”  Little more than a year later, facing impeachment and removal from office, Nixon resigned although, to be fair, when he said “I’m not a crook”, he was speaking of his personal tax arrangements and not the Watergate affair and his legacy, like those of some of his predecessors and successors, need to be assessed separately from his crookedness.

Comrade Chairman Mao (Mao Zedong 1893–1976; chairman of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) 1949-1976, left), Gerald Ford (1913–2006; US president 1974-1977) and Dr Henry Kissinger (1923-2023; US national security advisor 1969-1975 & secretary of state 1937-1977) recalling Nixon's visit to China in 1972.  It's a popular word in politics.  In 1940, Winston Churchill (1875-1965; UK prime-minister 1940-1945 & 1951-1955) was advised by George VI (1895–1952; King of the United Kingdom 1936-1952) not to include Lord Beaverbrook (Maxwell Aitken, 1879-1964) in his administration; among the king’s many concerns was being aware of the reasons the press lord had gained his nickname “been a crook”.

Crooked wheels 

An early Chevrolet Corvair with swing axles, swinging (upper left), diagram of the early (single-pivot) and later (double-pivot) rear suspension (lower left) and swing spin (right), Volkswagen making making a virtue of necessity, a long-running theme in the advertising for the Beetle, the “Think Small” campaign conceived by their US agency Doyle Dane Bernbach (DDB). 

During the inter-war years, swing axles were genuinely an improvement on the solid units then in use and were the most cost-effective way an independent rear suspension could be brought to market but as speeds rose and the grip of tyres rose, their inherent limitations were exposed although the very behavior which could be lethal on the road delighted racing drivers who found it faster to "steer" with the rear wheels; in skilled hands, oversteer is an asset.  By the time the Corvair debuted it was in Europe close to the twilight of both most rear-engines and swing axles although the latter proved surprisingly persistent for a few hold-outs and Mercedes-Benz, despite their experience with the superior De Dion layout) was still producing a handful of 600s (the W100 Grosser; 1963-1981) with swing axles as late as 1981 but the Germans tamed the behavior with special anti-squat & anti-dive geometry as well as a compensating centre device.  Chevrolet did not and with a weight distribution which was even more exaggerated rearward by its relatively heavy and long engine, the Corvair’s handling could be unpredictable, something which the engineers wanted to alleviate by fitting a handful of parts (the cost under US$40) but this the accountants vetoed.  The ensuing crashes, death toll and law suits attracted the interest of consumer lawyer Ralph Nader (b 1934) who wrote Unsafe at Any Speed (1965), a critique on the industry generally although in the public mind it’s always been most associated with the failings of the Corvair which the author made the subject of the opening chapter.  After publication, GM hired private investigators to "dig up dirt" on Nader, but not only was no evidence found of the hoped-for homosexuality but using attractive women as "honey pots" proved no more of a lure.  To add insult to injury, GM's stalking, attempted entrapment and phone-tapping was in 1966 exposed in hearings before the US Senate hearing led by Robert F Kennedy (RFK, 1925–1968; US attorney general 1961-1964).  GM was forced publicly to apologize.

The lovely, Italianesque lines of the second generation Corvair (1966-1969).

Actually, the problems as described applied only to the Corvairs built between 1959-1963 (a partial fix to the suspension applied in 1963 and the double-pivot system installed for 1965) but the damage was done, neither its reputation or sales figures ever recovered (although increasing competition in its market segment certainly affected the latter) and it was only the corporation’s desire to save face which saw the much improved car restyled for 1966, production lingering on until 1969; it may be that Nader’s book actually prolonged the life of the thing.  It was unfortunate because the restyled Corvair was one of the better-looking machines of the era, only the truncated length of the bodywork forward of the cowl detracting from the elegance.

Curiously, after its demise came a coda.  In 1970, responding to pressure from Nader, the Nixon administration commissioned a study comparing the 1963 Corvair with five “similar” vehicles and a report was in 1972 issued by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) which concluded, inter alia, the Corvair’s handling and propensity to roll was comparable with that of “other light domestic cars.”  Nader dismissed the study as “a shoddy, internally contradictory whitewash” and accused the NHTSA of using “biased testing procedures and model selection.”, noting they assessed the 1963 Corvair which Chevrolet significantly had modified to ameliorate the worst of the deficiencies found in those built earlier (a proper "fix" would come with the 1965 range).  The Nixon administration ignored him, presumably taking the view what was good for General Motors was good for the country.  The origin of that famous “quote” is an answer given by Charles Erwin Wilson (1890–1961; US Secretary of Defense 1953-1957) during a confirmation hearing prior to his appointment to cabinet.  Then serving as president of General Motors (GM), he was asked whether, as head of the Department of Defense, he’d be prepared to make decisions that might be detrimental to GM. He responded: “For years I thought what was good for the country was good for General Motors, and vice versa.”  From that came “What's good for General Motors is good for America.” which was at the time an accurate reflection of the corporate world view.

Homonym

Homonym (pronounced hom-uh-nim)

(1) In phonetics, a word pronounced the same as another but differing in meaning, whether spelled the same way or not, as heir and air; a homophone.

(2) In phonetics, a word of the same written form as another but of different meaning and usually origin, whether pronounced the same way or not; a homograph.

(3) In phonetics, a word that is both a homophone and a homograph, that is, exactly the same as another in sound and spelling but different in meaning.

(4) A namesake (a person with the same name as another) (obsolete).

(5) In taxonomy, a name given to a species or genus (that should be unique) that has already been assigned to a different species or genus and that is thus rejected.

1635–1645: The construct was homo- +‎ -onym.  From the French homonyme and directly from the Latin homōnymum, from the Greek homṓnymon, neuter of homṓnymos (homonymous) (of the same name).  Homo was from the Ancient Greek ὁμός (homós) (same).  The –onym suffix was a creation for the international scientific vocabulary, a combining from the New Latin, from the Ancient Greek ὄνυμα (ónuma), Doric and Aeolic dialectal form of ὄνομα (ónoma) (name), from the primitive Indo-European root no-men- (name); the related form –onymy also widely used.

For a word which some insist has a narrow definition, it’s used by many to mean quite different things, the related forms being (1) homograph which is a word that has the same spelling as another word but has a different sound and a different meaning (such as bass which can be wither “a low, deep sound” or “a type of fish”) & (2) homophone which is a word that has the same sound as another word but is spelled differently and has a different meaning (such as to, two & too).  Homograph and homophone are uncontested but homonym is used variously either to mean (1) a word that is spelled like another but has a different sound and meaning (a homograph), (2) a word that sounds like another but has a different spelling and meaning (a homophone) or (3) a word that is spelled and pronounced like another but has a different meaning (a homograph & homophone).  According to the purists, a homonym must be both a homograph and a homophone and prescriptive dictionaries still tend in this direction but the descriptive volumes (usually while noting the strict construction), acknowledge that as used in modern English, a homonym can be a homograph or a homophone.  The sage advice seems to be (1) to stick to the classics and use all three words in their strict sense, (2) maintain consistency in use and (3) don’t correct the more permissive (on the Christian basis of “forgive them for they know not what they do”).

Crooked Hillary Clinton and the crooked spire of the Church of St Mary and All Saints, Chesterfield, Derbyshire, England.  Crooked has two meanings and pronunciations but is the one word used in two senses and thus not homonymic.  Crooked (pronounced krookt) is the past tense of the verb crook (bend or curve out of shape), from the Old English crōcian (to crook, to bend) which was cognate with Danish kroget (crooked; bent) whereas crooked (pronounced lrook-id) is an adjective meaning "bent or not straight" and may be used literally or figuratively to describe someone untrustworthy or dishonest.  Crooked is thus also an example of a hetronym (same spellings with different pronunciations and meanings

Adding to the murkiness, Henry Fowler (1858-1933) noted in Modern English Usage (1926) that some confusion has long clouded homonym and synonym, something he blamed on the “loose” meaning of the latter, explaining that homonyms are “separate words happen to be identical in form” while synonyms exist as separate words which happen to mean the same thing”.  However, at this point an etymological layer intrudes, Fowler noting “pole” in the sense of “a stake or shaft” is a native English word whereas when used to mean “the terminal point of an axis” the origins lie in the Greek.  Rather than one, “pole” is thus two separate words but being identical in form are thought homonyms.  By contrast “cat” the feline and “cat” as a clipping of the Admiralty’s flogging device “cat o' nine tails” “although identical in form and meaning different things are not separate words but the one used in two senses and thus not homonymic.

Lindsay Lohan on the couch, sofa, chesterfield or settee, depending on one’s view.

Layers attach also to synonyms, a word used anyway with notorious sloppiness, true synonyms (separate words identical in meaning in the context in which they’re applied) are actually rare compared with pairs or sets frequently cited, many of which enjoy only a partial equivalence of meaning.  The imprecise use isn’t necessarily bad and often is essential for poetic or literary reasons but technically, synonyms should be separate words identical in denotation (what they reference) and connotation (what they mean); pure synonyms may thus be interchanged with no effect but such pairs or sets are rare although in technical fields (IT & various flavors of engineering) they have in recent decades became more numerous.  However, even when words satisfy Henry Fowler’s standards, nuances drawn from beyond etymology and phonetics can lend a layer of meaning which detract from the purity of the synonymousness.  Sofa & couch for example are often used interchangeably and regarded by most as synonymous but to a student of the history of furniture, because couch is from the French noun couche (a piece of furniture with no arms used for lying) from the verb meaning “to lie down”, it differs from a sofa (a long, upholstered seat usually with arms and a back).  That’s fine but “sofa” is used by some as a class-identifier, being the “U” (upper-class) form while couch, settee and such are “non-U”.

Indent

Indent (pronounced in-dent)

(1) To form deep recesses in something.

(2) In typography, to begin a line or lines at a greater or less distance from the margin; to set in or back from the margin, as the first line of a paragraph (the “hanging indent” pulls the line out into the margin).

(3) To cut or tear a document (especially a contract or deed in duplicate) so the irregular lines may be matched to confirm its authenticity

(4) To cut or tear the edge of (copies of a document) in an irregular way.

(5) To make tooth-like notches in something; to notch.

(6) To indenture, as an apprentice (mostly archaic).

(7) In inventory control or stock management, to draw an order upon stock.

(8) In military use (originally under the Raj), a requisition or order for supplies, sent to the commissariat of an army (later adopted in commerce generally to mean “to place an order for a good or commodity, usually for foreign goods, historically through an agent).

(9) To enter into an agreement by indenture; make a compact.

(10) In US financial history, a certificate (or intended certificate), issued by the government of the United States at the close of the Revolution, for the principal or interest of the public debt; at the close of the Revolutionary War for the principal or interest due on the public debt.

(13) In steel fabrication, to form a pattern on metal.

(14) An alternative word for indentation.

(15) A class of stamp; an impression made in the paper (as distinct from a wax seal which sat atop and was indented with a seal).

(16) Formally commit to doing something; to engage someone (both obsolete and based on the notion of the arrangement being formalized with an “indented document” even after the practice has ceased).

(17) To crook or turn; to wind in and out; to zigzag (obsolete).

1350–1400: From the Middle English, from the Old French endenter, a back formation from indented (having tooth-like notches).  The verb indent in the sense of “to dent or press in” emerged in the early fifteenth century and was etymologically distinct from the contemporary verbs indenten & endenten (to make notches; to give (something) a toothed or jagged appearance (which was used also to convey “to make a legal indenture, make a written formal agreement or contract”)) and was from the twelfth century Old French endenter (to notch or dent, give a serrated edge to) and from the Medieval Latin indentare & indentātus, the construct in Latin being in- (in-) + dent (tooth) from dēns, from the Proto-Italic dents, from the primitive Indo-European dónts and cognate with the Ancient Greek ὀδούς (odoús), the Sanskrit दत् (dát), the Lithuanian dantìs, the Old English tōþ (source of the English tooth) and the Armenian ատամ (atam), from the primitive Indo-European root dent- (tooth).  The prefix -in is quirky because it can act either to negate or intensify.  The general rule is that when pre-pended to a noun or adjective, it reinforces the quality signified and when pre-pended to an adjective, it negates the meaning, the latter mostly in words borrowed from French.  The Latin prefix in- was from the Proto-Italic en-, from the primitive Indo-European n̥- (not), the zero-grade form of the negative particle ne (not) and was akin to ne-, nē & nī.  In Modern English it is from the Middle English in-, from Old English in- (in, into), from the Proto-Germanic in, from the primitive Indo-European en.  Dent was dialectal variant of the Middle English dunt, dent, dente & dint (a blow; strike; dent), from the Old English dynt (blow, strike, the mark or noise of a blow), from the Proto-Germanic duntiz (a blow) and akin to the Old Norse dyntr (dint).  Indent, indenture & indenting are nouns & verbs, indenter, indention, indentation & indentor are nouns, indented is a verb & adjective and indentable is an adjective; the noun plural is indents.

Scriptum super libros sententiarum Petri Lombardi, Liber I (Commentary on the Book I of the Sentences of Peter Lombard) by Italian Dominican friar, philosopher & theologian Saint Thomas Aquinas (1225–1274), transcribed in Latin as a decorated manuscript on paper by an unknown scribe in central Italy in the mid-late fifteenth century.  Still sometimes used in newspaper and magazine publishing, the "Drop Cap" is a disproportionately large letter which appears as the first in a sentence and the practice created the most obvious need for an indent.  Otherwise the indent appeared as a blank space to indicate the start of a new paragraph, a technique some still use.

The original significance of “indented documents” was they were an analogue version of modern digital cryptography such as the need for both public and private “keys” to make a file accessible.  The noun indenture was a late fourteenth century form meaning (written formal contract for services (between master and apprentice, etc), a deed with mutual covenants), from the Anglo-French endenture, from the Old French endenteure (indentation), from endenter (to notch or dent).  The classic indented document was a contact or agreement of some kind created in two (or more) parts on a single sheet of parchment which was then cut in an irregular zigzag (ie an “indented” line) with each party retaining their piece.  Each part of the parchment could be authenticated by matching its jagged edge with that of another part.  The forms indented & indenting were known by the late fourteenth century while the additional of indent to the jargon of mechanical printing to describe “the insertion of a blank space to force text inward” dates from the 1670 although the idea of an indent being “a cut or notch in a margin” was in use in the 1590s, derived from the verb.  There is also evidence indent was used in the late 1400s the sense of “a written agreement” (ie the documents cut from the single sheet of parchment) as a scribe’s short form of the formal term endenture."  That practice arose because ink and parchment were both expensive and over many pages, money would be saved if the number of letters used was reduced and the same tactic lasted well into the twentieth century because those sending telegrams were charged by the letter.  Unfortunately, different scribes sometimes used different abbreviations which can make the reading of medieval texts a challenge.

Prelude, dent & aftermath: Lindsay Lohan out driving (left), the big dent (centre) and after being fixed (right).

In October 2005, Lindsay Lohan went for a drive in her Mercedes-Benz SL 65 AMG roadster.  It didn’t end well.  Based on the R230 (2001-2011) platform, the SL 65 AMG was produced between 2004-2012, all versions rated in excess of 600 horsepower, something perhaps not a wise choice for someone with no background handling such machinery though it could have been worse, the factory building 400 (175 for the US market, 225 for the RoW (rest of the world)) of the even more powerful SL 65 Black Series, the third occasion an SL was offered without a soft-top and the second time one had been configured with a permanent fixed-roof (a production number of 350 is sometimes quoted but those maintaining registers insist it was 400).  By 2007, the car (still with California registration plates (5LZF057) attached) had been repaired, detailed & simonized and was being offered for sale in Texas, the odometer said to read 6207 miles (9989 km).  Bidding was said to be “healthy” so it was thought all's well that ends well but once the vehicle's provenance was brought to the attention of the repair shop, it was realized the celebrity connection might increase its value so it was advertised on eBay with more detail, including the inevitable click-bait of LiLo photographs.

However, either eBay doesn't approve of commerce profiting from the vicissitudes suffered by Hollywood starlets or they'd received a C&D (cease & desist) letter from someone's lawyers and the auction ended prematurely.  It proved a brief respite, the SL 65 soon back on eBay Motors but with the offending part of the blurb limited to "previously owned by high profile celebrity", leaving it to prospective buyers to join the dots.  According to Business Insider, the car sold for US$111,000 which was much higher than would be expected for one which had been repaired after an accident, albeit it a low-speed impact.  The R230s anyway had a complex construction and the AMG versions added even more intricacy so although it is possible to restore a damaged AMG to the state in which it left the factory, it does require both expertise and some often expensive parts.  Because of that, repaired Mercedes-Benz AMG cars trade usually at a significant discount so the amount realized was indicative of the perceived value of a celebrity association.

The noun indentation was first used in 1728 do describe “a cut, notch or incision at the margin or edge of something” and after 1847 the word was used to describe “a dent or impression; a small hollow or depression, a slight pit” which was used in everything from metal-working & carpentry to pastry chefs making pies.  The significance was that usually an indentation was deliberate while a dent was the consequence of an accident.  The now rare indention was a noun dating from 1763 and was an irregular formation from indent and again gained its utility by distinguishing between marginal notches and dents but, in the way of such things, both seem often to have been used interchangeably. The familiar noun dent (a blow; strike; dent) in the sense of “an indentation, a hollow mark made by a blow or pressure" was known by the 1560 and although there’s no documentary evidence, most etymologists assume it was coined under the influence of indent.

Kink

Kink (pronounced kingk)

(1) A twist or curl, as in a thread, rope, wire, or hair, caused by its doubling or bending upon itself.

(2) An expression describing muscular stiffness or soreness, as in the neck or back.

(3) A flaw or imperfection likely to hinder the successful operation of something, as a machine or plan (differs from a bug in that kinks or their consequences tend immediately to be obvious.

(4) A mental twist; notion; whim or crotchet (and in a pejorative sense an unreasonable notion; a crotchet; a whim; a caprice).

(5) In slang, a flaw or idiosyncrasy of personality; a quirk.

(6) In slang, bizarre or unconventional sexual preferences or behavior; a sexual deviation (Defined as paraphilia; the parameters of paraphilic disorders (essentially that which is non-normophilic) are (to some extent) defined in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) but the public perception of kinkiness varies greatly between and within cultures).

(7) In slang, a person characterized by such preferences or behavior (a kinkster).

(8) To form, or cause to form, a kink or kinks, as a rope or hairstyle or a physical construction like a road; to be formed into a kink or twist.

(9) Loudly to laugh; to gasp for breath as in a severe fit of coughing (now rare except in Scotland).

(10) In mathematics, a positive 1-soliton solution to the sine-Gordon equation.

(11) In the jargon of US railroad maintenance as “sun kink”, a buckle in railroad track caused by extremely hot weather, which could cause a derailment.

(12) In fandom slang as “kinkmeme” (or kink meme), an online space in which requests for fan fiction (generally involving a specific kink) are posted and fulfilled anonymously (a subset thus of the anon meme).

(13) In slang, as “kinkshame” (or kink-shame or kink shame), to mock, shame, or condemn someone (a kinker) for their sexual preferences or interests and fetishes.

1670–1680: From the Middle English kink (knot-like contraction or short twist in a rope, thread, hair, etc (originally a nautical term), from the Dutch kink (a twist or curl in a rope), from the Proto-Germanic kenk- & keng- (to bend, turn), from the primitive Indo-European geng- (to turn, wind, braid, weave) and related to the Middle Low German kinke (spiral screw, coil), the Old Norse kikna (to nod; to bend backwards, to sink at the knee as if under a burden”) and the , the Icelandic kengur (a bend or bight; a metal crook).  It’s thought related to the modern kick although a LCA (last common ancestor) has never been identified.  The intransitive verb emerged in the 1690s and the transitive by the early nineteenth century.  The adjective kinky (at that stage of physical objects such as ropes or hair full of kinks, twisted, curly) seems first to have been used in 1844.  Words with a similar meaning (depending on context) include crimp, wrinkle, flaw, hitch, imperfection, quirk, coil, corkscrew, crinkle, curl, curve, entanglement, frizz, knot, loop, tangle, cramp, crick, pain &, pang  The sense familiar in Scottish dialect use (a convulsive fit of coughing or laughter; a sonorous in-draft of breath; a whoop; a gasp of breath caused by laughing, coughing, or crying) was from the From Middle English kinken & kynken, from the Old English cincian (attested in cincung), from the Proto-West Germanic kinkōn, from the Proto-Germanic kinkōną (to laugh), from the primitive Indo-European gang- (to mock, jeer, deride), and related to the Old English canc (jeering, scorn, derision).  It was cognate with the Dutch kinken (to kink, to cough).  One curious adaptation was the (nineteenth century) use of kinker to describe circus performers, presumably on the basis of their antics (kinky in the sense of a twisted rope).  Kink is a noun & verb, kinkily is an adverb, kinkiness & kinkster are nouns, kinked is a verb & adjective, kinky and kinkier & kinkiest are adjectives; the noun plural is kinks.

Bridge with kinks: Lucky knot bridge, Dragon King Harbor River in Meixi Lake District, Changsha, China.  The design was inspired by the Möbius strip although the structure is not a true representation of a Möbius.

Kink appears to have entered English in the 1670 from the interaction of English & Dutch seafarers, the first use of the word being nautical, French & Swedish gaining it in a similar manner.  The figurative sense of “an odd notion, a mental twist, a whim, a capricious act” was first noted in US English in 1803 in the writings of Thomas Jefferson (1743–1826; US president 1801-1809).  It was one of the many terms applied to those thought “sexually abnormal”, the first use noted in 1965 (although the adjective kinky had been so applied as early as 1959) and the use as a synonym for “a sexual perversion, fetish, paraphilia” is thought by most etymologists to have become established by the early 1970s.  The slang, “kinkshame” means “to mock, shame, or condemn someone (a kinker) for their sexual preferences or interests and fetishes”.  Dictionaries tend to list this only as a verb (ie that directed at another) but it would seem also a noun (a feeling of kinkshame), such as that suffered by Umberto Nicola Tommaso Giovanni Maria di Savoia (1904–1983; the last King of Italy (May-June 1946) who, while heir to the throne (and styled Prince of Piedmont), Benito Mussolini’s (1883-1945; Duce (leader) & prime-minister of Italy 1922-1943) secret police discovered the prince was a sincere and committed Roman Catholic but one unable to resist his “satanic homosexual urges” and his biographer agreed, noting he was “forever rushing between chapel and brothel, confessional and steam bath” often spending hours “praying for divine forgiveness.”  He would seem to have been suffering kinkshame.

Lindsay Lohan with kinked hair. 

Car & Driver "Fastest American Car" comparison test, April 1976.

Although the word kinky had by then for some time been in use to describe sexual proclivities beyond the conventional, in April 1976, when the US magazine Car & Driver chose to describe a pickup truck as “kinky” it was using the word in the sense of “quirky” or “different” and certainly not in a pejorative way.  While testing the Chevrolet C-10 stepside in an attempt to find the fastest American built “car”, the editors noted that although the phenomenon hadn’t yet travelled south of the Mason-Dixon Line. “…kinky pickups are one of the more recent West Coast fascinations”.  A few years earlier, it would have been absurd to include a pickup in a top-speed contest but the universe had shifted and ownership of the fast machines of the pre-1972 muscle car era had been rendered unviable by the insurance industry before being banned by the legislators; by earlier standards, high-performance was no longer high.  Some demand for speed however remained and General Motors found a loophole: the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) didn't impose power-sapping exhaust emission controls on anything with a gross vehicle weight rating above 6000 pounds (2722 kg).  Thus emerged Chevrolet’s combination of the heavy-duty version of the pickup chassis (F44) with the big-block, 454 cubic inch (7.4 litre) V8, a detuned edition of the engine which half-a-decade earlier had been offered with the highest horsepower rating Detroit had ever advertised.  Power and brutish enjoyment was ensured but the aerodynamic qualities of the pickup were such it could manage only third place in Car & Driver’s comparison, its 110 (177 km/h) mph terminal velocity shaded by the Pontiac Trans Am (118/190) and the Chevrolet Corvette (125/201) which won although both were slow compared with what recently had been possible.  The pickup did however outrun Ford’s Mustang Mach 1 which certainly looked the part but on the road prove anaemic, 106 mph (171 km/h) as fast as it could be persuaded to go.  In second place was what turned out to be the surprise package, the anonymous-looking Dodge Dart which, although an old design, was powered by a version of the Chrysler LA small-block V8, one of the best of the era and clean enough to eschew the crippling catalysts most engines by then required.  Its 122 mph (196 km/h) capability made it the fastest American sedan.

Kinkiness in 1964-1965: 1965 Dodge D-100 with 426 Street Wedge V8.

The kinky pickup however was a harbinger for where went California, so followed the other forty-nine.  The idea of the kinky pickup had actually begun in 1964 when Chrysler quietly slipped onto the market a high-performance version of the the Dodge D-100, a handful of which were built with a 413 (6.7 litre) cubic inch V8 but with little more fanfare, the 426 cubic inch (7.0 litre) Street Wedge was next year added to the option list which, rated at 365 horsepower, was more than twice as powerful than the competition.  Ahead of its time, the big-power in the engines D-100 were withdrawn in 1966 but it was the first muscle truck and the spiritual ancestor of the C-10 which a decade later was faster than the hottest Mustang, damning with faint praise though that may be.  The trend continued and Dodge early in the twenty-first century even sold pickups with an 8.3 litre (505 cubic inch) V10.  The market has since shown little sign of losing its desire for fast pickups and the new generation of electric vehicles are likely to be faster still.

The adjective "kinky" evolved from the noun but a linguistic quirk in the use of "kink" in the gay community is that etymologically it was technically a back-formation from "kinky".  In the LGBTQQIAAOP movement, there is some debate whether displays of “kink” should be part of “pride” events such as public parade.  One faction thinks group rights trumps all else and there can be no acceptance of any restrictions whereas others think the PR cost too high.  One implication of some representation of this or that kink being included in pride parades is that presumably, once accepted as a part of public displays, it ceases to be kinky and becomes just another place on the spectrum of normality.  Kinky stuff surely should be what goes on only behind closed doors; if in public it can even be hinted at, it can't truly be a kink because a kink must be something seriously twisted.  

1962 BMW 1500 (Neue Klasse, left), the incomparable BMW E9 (1968-1975, centre) and the 2023 BMW 760i (G70, right).

In automotive design, the “Hoffmeister kink” is a description of the forward bend in the C-pillar (D-pillar on SUVs) and it’s associated almost exclusively with BMW (Bayerische Motoren Werke) vehicles built since the early 1960s.  The kink is named after Wilhelm Hofmeister (1912–1978; BMW design chief 1955-1970) who used the shape on the BMW Neue Klasse (The “New Class”, the first of which was the 1500 and in various forms was in production 1962-1975) although the BMW 3200 CS (1962-1965) which was styled by Giuseppe "Nuccio" Bertone (1914–1997) also used the lines and design work of both began in 1960.  However, the name “Hoffmeister kink” stuck not because it originated with Herr Hoffmeister but because BMW has for decades stuck with it so it’s now perhaps even more of an identifiable motif than their double-kidney grill which is now less recognizable than once it was.  Herr Hoffmeister deserves to be remembered because the work of his successors has been notably less impressive and none has matched his E9 coupe (1968-1975) although it gained as much infamy for its propensity to rust as admiration for its elegance.

Some pre-Hoffmeister kinks:  1949 Buick Super Sedanette (left), 1951 Kaiser Deluxe (centre) and 1958 Lancia Flaminia Sport Zagato (right).

Built-in kink: 1964 Ford Galaxie four-door hardtop.

A curiosity in the tale of the Hofmeister kink is that between 1957-1963, the Ford Motor Company (FoMoCo) in the US produced as an assembly (made of several part-numbers) a Hofmeister kink which was “bolted-on” to the rear door of four-door Ford and Mercury four-door hardtops.  The doomed Edsels and more exalted Lincolns didn’t use them and after 1961 Lincoln for a while abandoned the body-style although a dozen-odd prototypes & pre-production examples were produced and there are competing theories about why it never reached the showrooms.  The appendage existed apparently because it was a quick and cheap way to ensure the rear-windows of the four-door hardtops could fully retract into the door when wound down.

Bolt-on kink; how it was done on Ford & Mercury four-door hardtops (1957-1963): Sedans with (central) B-pillar un-kinked (left) and pillarless hardtops with bolted-on kink (right).

Because of the multi-part complexity of the pressings and the need for precise tolerances (something Detroit often didn’t quite manage) to ensure a good “open & shut”, doors are expensive to tool for so Ford’s temptation to do a “bolt-on” was understandable.  However, despite that, for the body’s fourth and final season in 1964, the kink was integrated into the door but the look was banished when the new range appeared for 1965, the leading edge of the C pillar re-located in the industry-standard way.