Ambassador

Ambassador (pronounced am-bas-uh-dawr)

(1) A diplomatic official of the highest rank, sent by one sovereign or state to another as its resident representative (ambassador extraordinary and plenipotentiary).

(2) A diplomatic official of the highest rank sent by a government to represent it on a temporary mission, as for negotiating a treaty.

(3) A diplomatic official serving as permanent head of a country's mission to the United Nations or some other international organization.

(4) An authorized messenger or representative.

(5) A term for a corporate representative, often the public face(s) of the company, mush favoured by fashion houses etc.

1325-1375: From the Middle English ambassadore, from the Anglo-Norman ambassadeur & ambassateur, from the Old Italian ambassatore (ambassador in the dialectal Italian), from the Old Occitan ambaisador (ambassador), a derivative of ambaissa (service, mission, errand), from the Medieval Latin ambasiator, from the andbahti (service, function), from the Proto-Germanic ambahtiją (service, office), a derivative of the Proto-Germanic ambahtaz (servant), from the Gaulish ambaxtos (servant) which was the source also of the Classical Latin ambactus (vassal, servant, dependent).  The early Proto-Celtic ambaxtos (servant), was from the primitive Indo-European ambhi (drive around), from ambi- (around) + ag- (to drive).  The adjective ambassadorial (of or belonging to an ambassador) dates from 1759.  The spellings ambassador and embassador were used indiscriminately until the nineteenth century, the OED (Oxford English Dictionary) curiously continuing, well into the twentieth century, to insist the later was the preferred form in US English long after it had there been abandoned everywhere except in the halls of the State Department.  In diplomatic use, the US government had an interesting history of nomenclature, neither sending nor accrediting foreign ambassadors, having only “ministers”.  The reason for this lies in the origins of the United States as a revolutionary state freeing itself from monarchical tyranny; it thus insisted only on ministers who represented states, not ambassadors who historically were the personal emissaries of sovereigns.  Functionally there was no difference and not infrequently, in in casual use ministers were styled as ambassadors with neither offence or declaration of war following and, having made the political point for a century, after 1893, every minister became instead an ambassador.  Ambassador, ambassadress, ambassadry & ambassadrship are nouns, ambassadorial & ambassadorless are  adjectives and ambassadorially is an adverb; the noun plural is ambassadors.

Kylie Jenner (b 1997), a most glam glambassador.

The neologism ambassadonor was coined to describe those appointed to ambassadorships on the basis of the size of their donations to whichever party has the embassy in their gift.  A common practice of long-standing in the US, it’s a way not only of conferring prestige on the appointee but also grants them a title, the convention being an entitlement for life to be addressed as Mr or Madam Ambassador.  For doners, the appointments can be good value for money because (1) traditionally they’re skewed towards desirable locations (a nice (non-shithole) country with a pleasant climate and a majority white population) and (2) they’re effectively sinecures during which one can wine & dine (the US taxpayer picking up the tab), network and pursue business opportunities with any real work handled by the professional staff appointed by the State Department.  That’s just how politics works and it’s a better gig than being something like secretary of state for agriculture.  The nouns ambassadress & ambassadrix are now rare and did double duty as (1) a female ambassador or (2) the wife of an ambassador.  In the modern age, either may make a comeback because when a female ambassador is appointed, if she has a wife the forms may be thought useful but should she have a husband, there’s no equivalent honorific; he’s just an unacknowledged appendage.  Tempting though the thought may be, embassador & embassadress are not two embarrassing appointees (possibly ambassadonors) to an embassy but just now archaic alternative spellings of ambassador & ambassadress.  The informal noun glambassador describes a glamorous public figure (especially a female celebrity) who uses (or licences) her personal brand & image to promote some product or cause.  Kylie Jenner’s role in the promotion of Meta Glasses (camera glasses) may be thought a glambassadorship.

Diplomatic ranks since 1961

Margaret Qualley (b 1994), Venice Film Festival, August 2019, Brand Ambassador for French fashion house Chanel.

Diplomatic rank is the system of professional and social rank used in the world of diplomacy and international relations. A diplomat's rank determines many ceremonial details, such as the order of precedence at official processions, the seat at the table at state dinners, the person to whom diplomatic credentials should be presented and the title by which they should be addressed.  The current system of diplomatic ranks was established by the Vienna Convention on Diplomatic Relations (1961) and the modern list is a simplified version of the more elaborate system established by the Congress of Vienna (1814-1815).  There are now three senior ranks, two of which remain in use:

Ambassador. An ambassador is a head of mission who is accredited to the receiving country's head of state. They head a diplomatic mission known as an embassy, which usually is headquartered in a chancery in the receiving state's capital, often clustered with others is what’s often styled a “diplomatic quarter”, a feature of town-planning especially associated with cities where physical security is a concern.  A papal nuncio is considered to have ambassadorial rank, and they preside over a nunciature; often, in predominantly Roman Catholic countries the nuncio is, ex officio, appointed dean of the diplomatic corps.  Between Commonwealth countries, high commissioners are exchanged; they preside over a high commission and enjoy the same diplomatic rank as an ambassador.

Minister. A Minister is a head of mission who is accredited to the receiving country's head of state. A Minister heads a legation rather than an embassy. However, the last legations were upgraded to embassies in the late 1960s, and the rank of Minister is now functionally obsolete although any country may at any time appoint them.  An envoy or an internuncio was also considered to have the rank of Minister; they’re now granted status ad-hoc but tend to be regarded as being on the level of consular appointments.  None of this should be confused with the long and tangled history of the resident minister, appointments sometimes political, sometimes diplomatic and sometime administrative.  At different times and in different places, it has meant different things, used essentially to mean whatever the immediate situation demanded and, being outside any formal rules or conventions of diplomacy, flexibility was possible.

A chargé d'affaires en pied (usually styled as chargé d'affairs in everyday use) is a permanent head of mission, accredited by his country's foreign minister to the receiving nation's foreign minister, in cases where the two governments have not reached an agreement to exchange ambassadors.  A chargé d'affaires ad interim is a diplomat who temporarily heads a diplomatic mission in the absence of an ambassador.

A variety of titles exist beneath the formal three such as counsellor, first secretary, second secretary, third secretary, attaché and assistant attaché.  The actual roles discharged vary, indeed, some of these jobs are actually covers for spies or other political operatives and, just as ambassadorships are used often as a rewards for helpful services (such as large campaign donations) or as a temptingly lucrative sinecure to get a potential rival out of the country, the lower appointments have been a dumping ground for troublesome public servants when, for whatever reason, they can’t be sacked.  The diplomatic appointment also determines the description of the architecture.  An ambassador works from (and usually lives in) an embassy whereas other diplomats (except Commonwealth high commissioners who operate from high commissions) tend to be housed in consulates.  Like ambassador and embassador, the terms ambassy and embassy used to be interchangeable but in each case one prevailed and the other went extinct.  Etymology has no explanation for either case except it was just a pattern of use which emerged and that’s how English evolves.  The word embassy evolved in another way.  It now, institutionally and architecturally, refers to something permanent but, until the late nineteenth century was more often a temporary mission and described a delegation which would return home when its business concluded.  The history is reflected in some terms still used in diplomacy such as "Head of Mission".

Uncle Otto and nephew Eric

Uncle Otto, taking the salute, Paris 1940.

Because the Third Reich (1933-1945) never concluded a peace treaty with Vichy France, diplomatic recognition was not possible so no ambassador was accredited.  There was however a de-facto ambassador, Adolf Hitler (1889-1945; Führer (leader) and German head of government 1933-1945 & head of state 1934-1945) in November 1940 appointing Otto Abetz (1903-1958) to the German Embassy in Paris, a post he held until July 1944 when diplomatic conditions changed a bit.  As the letters patent made clear, he acted with full ambassadorial powers and, genuinely a Francophile, he certainly attempted to use his authority in a way he thought would be conducive to making France a central element in a Europe under Berlin's benign hegemony.  These proto-EU (European Union (1993)), the multi-national aggregation which evolved from the EEC (European Economic Community), the Zollverein formed in 1957) gestures didn't much impress his colleagues from the Nazi's "loot & pillage" school of thought with Hermann Göring (1893–1946; leading Nazi 1922-1945, Hitler's designated successor & Reichsmarschall 1940-1945) openly contemptuous of "Herr Abetz's" earnestness.  Hitler, who applied "divide and conquer" tactics to enemies, allies & associates alike, seldom attempted to mediate in such squabbles.  In July 1949 a French court handed Abetz a 20 year sentence for crimes against humanity; released in 1954, he died in 1958 in a traffic accident on the Cologne-Ruhr Autobahn and there are conspiracy theorists who suspect the death was an "assassination", the French in the era not above administering some ex post facto justice.

Nephew Eric, taking tea, Canberra 2018.

Otto Abetz was the great uncle of Eric Abetz (b 1958; Liberal Party senator for Tasmania, Australia 1994-2022, member of the Tasmanian House of assembly since 2024).  Because of the coincidence of one being born in the same year death visited the other, there was speculation about the transmigration of uncle Otto’s soul to nephew Eric.  Spiritualists however generally agree this would have been impossible because the former senator was born on 25 January, his old Nazi relative living until 5 May the same year.  Transmigration was known also as metempsychosis and was an idea most associated in the West with pre-Ancient (archaic) Greece but which may (perhaps concurrently) have origins in Egypt and India.  Mr Abetz is now Tasmania's treasurer, a perhaps thankless task given the level of the state exchequer's indebtedness but despite his reputation as a conservative, he has a history of innovation, proudly telling one interviewer his law firm was in the 1980s the first in Hobart to include a splash of color on the firm's letterhead.  At the time, that would have seen some think him a troublesome radical but clearly he's a problem-solver and that's good because in his new role there are problems to solve.  Encouragingly, despite the unpromising family background, no evidence has ever emerged linking Eric Abetz to the Freemasons co there's that.

Lindsay Lohan: Allbirds Ambassador         

Lindsay Logan, nueva embajadora de Allbirds (the new Allbirds ambassador), possibly on a Wednesday.

In 2022, Allbirds appointed Lindsay Lohan as an ambassador for its "Unexpected Athlete" campaign, focusing on her for the new limited edition of its most successful running shoe to date, the Tree Flyer.  The promotional video issued for the announcement was nicely scripted, beginning with Ms Lohan’s perhaps superfluous admission that as an ambassador for running “I am a little unexpected" before working in a few references to her career in film (showing again a rare sense of comedic timing), fondness for peanut butter cookies and the odd social media faux-pas, many of which she's over the years embraced.  It wasn't disclosed if the photo-shoot happened on a Wednesday but the featured shoe (Lux Pink) was said to include no plastics but Allbirds didn't respond to enquiries about the material used for the laces' aglets.  

Lindsay Lohan, Allbirds “Unexpected Athlete Ambassador”.

As a well-known car driver and frequent flyer who has for years lived in an air-conditioned cocoon in Dubai, it’s not clear how far up the chart of conspicuous consumption Ms Lohan has stamped her environmental footprint but US-based footwear and apparel company Allbirds claims its design, production & distribution processes are designed to make its products as eco-friendly as possible.  It is a certified “B Corporation”, a system of private certification of for-profit companies of their "social and environmental performance" conferred by B Lab, a non-profit organization which claims to provide consumers with a way reliably to distinguish the genuinely environmentally active from those who cynically “greenwash”.

The AMC Ambassador's footnote in the history of automotive AC

The AMC (American Motors Corporation) Ambassador was between 1957-1974 produced in eight generations although the name had since 1927 been used by a company that would become part of the ultimately doomed AMC conglomerate.  Emblematic of the company's unsuccessful attempt consistently to compete with Detroit's big three (GM (General Motors), Ford and Chrysler), the Ambassador was in those years offered variously as an intermediate and full-sized model but unfortunately, this culminated in its largest ever iteration being sold as the first oil crisis struck in 1973; the universe shifted and the Ambassador was axed in little more than year.  One footnote in the story is that in 1968, the advertising made much of the Ambassador being the only car in the world (other than those from Rolls-Royce) with AC (air-conditioning) as standard equipment.  That was a bit of a fudge in that at the time a number of European manufacturers fitted AC (optional in Europe) to all of at least some of the models they shipped to the US but technically, AMC was correct.

1974 Rolls-Royce Phantom VI (1968-1990) Formal Limousine (coachwork by Mulliner Park Ward).

Originally, this Phantom VI was delivered to Moscow to serve as official car of British Ambassador to Russia; symbolism was of great significance during the high Cold War.  When supplied, it was in traditional diplomatic black but, after being acquired by a US collector, this was changed to two-tone black over garnet, close to the hues associated with some of the Rolls-Royces in the Royal Mews.  By the time the last left the factory in 1990, it probably remained true Rolls-Royce was "the best-built car in the world" but in many ways the Phantom VI was a relic with the engineering of some of the underpinnings dating from the inter-war years (1919-1939).  The sole virtue of the four-wheel drum brakes was their silence in operation and the solid rear axle's semi-elliptic springs (the nickname "cart springs" gained from them for centuries appearing on horse-drawn carts, carriages, buggies and such) were wrapped in leather gaiters, ensuring the ambassador would never be troubled by tiresomely intrusive squeaks.

The Rolls-Royce "best car in the world" cliché  was in the 1960s still a powerful cultural message and a couple of seasons earlier Ford had spent a lot of money on an advertising campaign asserting their then new range of full-sized Fords was "quieter than a Rolls-Royce", a claim that must have seemed audacious given the English company's hook: “At 60 mph (100 km/h) the loudest noise in a Rolls-Royce comes from the electric clock”.  That shtick had been verified (at least in ideal conditions) by sceptical journalists although one did note it was possible to make electric clocks function silently, concluding the company deliberately fitted time-pieces emitting an untypically loud “tick-tock”, just to ensure the claim was true.  Still, true it was and to ensure they couldn't be accused of “mere puffery”, Ford spent a lot of money, J. Walter Thompson (then Ford’s advertising agency) commissioning acoustical consultants Boldt, Beranek and Neuman to run tests, two brand new Rolls-Royce Silver Cloud (1955-1966) III (1963-1966) saloons purchased for the project.  What the engineer’s dB (decibel) meters revealed was that, under conditions that were controlled but representative of much of the driving experience in the US, the Fords were indeed quieter.

1964 Chrysler New Yorker Salon advertising.

AMC's marketing budget didn't stretch to hiring consultants of buying a brace of Roll-Royces but to verity its claim, all it required was a Rolls-Royce brochure or specification sheet, free from the closest distributer.  In a sense it was a bold move for AMC to include AC as standard in the Ambassador because it was in 1968 still far from a commonly ordered option and even Cadillacs, Lincolns and Imperials sometimes were ordered without the buyer ticking the box for what was then an expensive choice (well into four figures in 2026 US$ values).  Nor was the commercial history encouraging.  Chrysler in 1963-1964 had tried the approach of bundling almost all available options (including AC) into a top-of-the-range New Yorker it dubbed the “Salon”, daringly offering it at a price-point above some of the (less well-equipped) models in the Imperial line, nominally the corporation’s flagship brand.  Salon was from the French salon (reception room) and although the word was associated with gatherings of literary and artistic circles, most Americans were probably more familiar with the “beauty salon” (eyelashes, hair, nails and such) so how well the “associative messaging” would have cut through is uncertain but the imagery used for marketing certainly had a “European theme” with English society photographer Cecil Beaton (1904-1980) hired to do a few “artistic” shots.  Alas, at almost US$5,900 it was some 30% more expensive than the standard New Yorker and at that price was intruding not only on Imperial’s territory but also that of Cadillac and Lincoln, all with more “brand cachet” than Chrysler although, to be fair, on the basis of cost-breakdown, the value was there because it was still cheaper than any of them similarly equipped from their (long) option lists.  The salon lasted in the catalogue less than two seasons with a disappointing 2,214 sold (593 of the in 1963; 1,621 in 1964) and that was the last time the US industry dabbled with “standard AC” until AMC’s venture with the Ambassador for 1968. 

Kunt & Cunt

Kunt (pronounced kuhnt)

(1) In English, a deliberate misspelling of the offensive slang “cunt”, used sometimes in an attempt to avoid sanction or censorship by text-based filters.  

(2) A Turkish surname (meaning “strong or durable” in ancient Turkish and in Ottoman Turkish (as Kunter), “kind man”) with roots in the Germanic.

Pre 900: Kunt & Kunter are surnames in both Turkish and German surname with evidence of historic use as a given name.  In ancient Turkish, Kunt means “strong or durable”, derived from the robustness of the large ropes used to tie the ships to the docks (the appended "er" meaning "soldier" or "man".  In Ottoman Turkish, it meant "kind man".

Kunt is ultimately from the Proto-Germanic kuntǭ, either through the Old High German cunta or a borrowing from the Middle High German kunte, the Old Norse kunta or another (northern) Germanic language and it had a relatively rare application as a descriptor for female genitalia.  All forms ultimately derive from the from the Proto-Germanic kuntǭ.  In Dutch, kunt was the second-person singular present indicative of kunnen and an archaic plural imperative of kunnen.  The Dutch kunnen (to be possible; to be able to; to be available) was from the Middle Dutch connen, cunnen, from the Old Dutch cunnan, from the Proto-West Germanic kunnan, from the Proto-Germanic kunnaną, from the primitive Indo-European ǵneh.

International distribution of the surname Kunt.

Saint Knut's Day (Knut in English also pronounced kuhnt) an alternative form of the historical name Cnut, from the Old Norse Knútr, cognate with Danish Knud and the English Canute) is a festival celebrated in Sweden and Finland on 13 January and interestingly is not marked in Denmark even though it's named after Prince Canute Lavard of Denmark and later associated also with his uncle, Canute the Saint, patron saint of Denmark.  Canute Lavard (Knut Levard in Swedish) was a Danish duke assassinated by his cousin and rival Magnus Nilsson on 7 January 1131, the murderer's intent the usurpation of the Danish throne.  From this act ensued a civil war which led to Knut being declared a saint, 7 January named as Knut's Day.  Because this day was so close to the Feast of the Epiphany (thirteenth day of Christmas), in 1680 as one of a number of reforms, Knut's Day was moved to 13 January, becoming tjugondag Knut (twentieth day of Knut/Christmas).  Some of the rituals are also observed in Finland but in a charming twist, the tradition there includes the "evil knut".

In polite circles, there’s usually such disapprobation attached to the word “cunt” that there’s temptation to find ways to slip it in yet remain unscathed.  The word cunctation (a delay) is one route but sometimes a gift comes in the mail.  The UK’s ambassadors to the United States come and go and tend to be remembered only if already famous for something else (Lord Halifax 1881-1959; UK ambassador to the US 1940-1946), associated with notable events (Sir Roger Makins (later Lord Sherfield) 1904-1996; UK ambassador to the US 1940-1946) or notably eccentric (Sir Archibald Clark Kerr (later Lord Inverchapel) 1882-1951; UK Ambassador to the USSR 1942-1946 & the US 1946-1948).  Memories however fade and Clark Kerr is now best remembered for a note he sent in 1943, while ambassador in gloomy wartime Moscow, to Lord Pembroke (Reginald Herbert; 1880–1960), then working in the Foreign Office in London.  Serendipitously, in 1978 the note was stumbled upon in the Foreign Office’s archives during research into an unrelated matter. 

In these dark days man tends to look for little shafts of light that spill from Heaven. My days are probably darker than yours, and I need, my God I do, all the light I can get. But I am a decent fellow, and I do not want to be mean and selfish about what little brightness is shed upon me from time to time. So I propose to share with you a tiny flash that has illuminated my sombre life and tell you that God has given me a new Turkish colleague whose card tells me that he is called Mustapha Kunt.

We all feel like that, Reggie, now and then, especially when spring is upon us, but few of us would care to put it on our cards. It takes a Turk to do that.

A linguistic quirk in the UK’s peerage is that while most of the female equivalents of the ranks have an obvious relationship with the male root, the link between “Earl” and “Countess” is not immediately obvious and the words “kunt” & “cunt” may have been involved.  Even Queen Victoria (1819–1901; Queen of the UK 1837-1901), who had recently assumed the throne, must have found the layers perplexing and felt compelled to ask her prime-minister (Lord Melbourne (1779–1848; Prime Minister of the UK 1834 & 1835-1841) about peers who would attend the coronation ceremony, noting in her diary: “I spoke to Ld M. about the numbers of Peers present at the Coronation, & he said it was quite unprecedented.  I observed that there were very few Viscounts, to which he replied: 'There are very few Viscounts,' that they were an old sort of title & not really English; that they came from Vice-Comites; that Dukes & Barons were the only real English titles; — that Marquises were likewise not English, & that people were mere made Marquises, when it was not wished that they should be made Dukes.”  As a rank in British peerage, the viscounts dated from 1440, initially a royal appointment as sheriff but as in France, evolved into a hereditarily title.  Marquess entered the system from the Old French marchis (ruler of a border area), from marche (frontier), from the Middle Latin marca (frontier), the significance of that to the English peerage being that the border of a Marquess’s lands were those which bordered potentially hostile territory and the holder, responsible for defense, was thus more important to the Crown that those whose holding lay behind the lines.

The aristocrats without the responsibility of border security were styled as barons, viscounts or earls although Melbourne chose not to burden Victoria with the etymology of earl.  Count was from the Old French conté or cunté (denoting a jurisdiction under the control of a count or a viscount (the modern French comté)) but, after the Norman conquest, the Norman French title “count” was abandoned and replaced with the Germanic eral, the entirely speculative but pleasing suggestion being the reason for this being the unfortunate phonetic similarity with “cunt” although the wives of earls continued to be styled “countess”; perhaps the patriarchy of the time were displaying some typical male humor.  Earl was from the Middle English erle & erl, (a strong man) from the Old English eorl, from the Proto-Germanic erlaz (related to the Old Norse jarl, the Old High German & Old Saxon erl), from the Proto-Germanic erōną & arōną (related to the Old Norse jara (fight, battle)), from the primitive Indo-European h₃er- (related to the Latin orior (to rise, get up), from the Ancient Greek ὄρνυμι (órnumi) (to urge, incite) and linked in some way with the Avestan ərənaoiti (to move), the Sanskrit ऋणोति (ṛṇóti) (to arise, reach, move, attack.  Earl also ultimately displaced the unrelated ealdorman (alderman) which, in Anglo-Saxon Britain, was applied to those men enjoying political ranking second only to the King; over the centuries, the Danish eorl was substituted and that evolved into the modern earl.  On the Continent, the wife of a count was styled countess (comitissa in Latin, comtesse in Old French) and when the Normans integrated their feudal system into England, the assimilation programme included ensuring the wives of earls enjoyed the same standing as wives of counts elsewhere in Europe but instead of coining “earless” (which would now sound odd in English but presumably would have become natural had it been adopted), the internationally recognized “countess” was preferred.

Cunt (pronounced kuhnt)

(1) Vulgar (thought most disparaging and offensive) slang for the vulva or vagina.

(2) A contemptuous term used to refer to a person (although in some cultures it can be applied neutrally or as a term or endearment (usually with an adjectival modifier (eg “a good cunt”) and used in the same way as “bastard”.

(3) A term of disapproval applied to any task or object (especially machinery) which is proving tiresome or difficult to fix, replace, remove etc; an unpleasant or difficult experience or incident.

(4) Sexual intercourse with a woman (archaic, long replaced by “fuck” and a myriad of others).

1275–1325: from the Middle English cunte, conte, counte, queinte, queynt & queynte, from the Old English cunte (female genitalia), from the Proto-Germanic kuntǭ & kunþaz.  It was cognate with the Old Norse kunta, the West Frisian kunte, the Middle Dutch conte (from whence the Dutch kont (butt)), the dialectal Swedish kunta, the dialectal Danish kunte and the Icelandic kunta.  Despite the apparently obvious link with the Latin cunnus (female pudenda (also, vulgarly, "a woman")), etymologists maintain the link has never been established.   

Cunnus is of uncertain etymology but the speculative links include the primitive Indo-European gen & gwen (woman) (most discount any relationship with the primitive Indo-European root geu- (hollow place)) and the primitive Indo-European kutnos (cover), cognate with cutis (skin), a metaphor identical to the one connecting the Latin vulva and English hull, albeit from a different Indo-European root.  Also speculative is a relationship to the Latin cuneus (wedge) or the primitive European (s)ker- (to cut), an evolution from the original sense of “gash” or “slit”.  It does seem counter intuitive there’s no link with the Latin cunnus but etymologists insist there’s simply no evidence and the more likely connection is with the primitive Indo-European root kut (bag; scrotum (and metaphorically also “female pudenda”)), source also of the Ancient Greek kysthos (vagina; buttocks; pouch, small bag (although there is the suggestion this is pre-Greek)), the Lithuanian kutys (money bag) and the Old High German hodo (testicles).

In 2010 nine of the reporters graduating from the University of Utah each wrote a final column for the student newspaper, the Daily Utah Chronicle.  The student newspaper is a practical training tool in the journalism course and one of the techniques learned is the use of the drop-cap (dropped capital), a large (usually two or more lines) capital letter used as a decorative element at the beginning of a paragraph or section.  Noting this, the nine choose to put four columns in vertical alignment on one page, five on another.  The reaction was probably as valuable a lesson in journalism as any the students had learned in all their years of study.  Previously little noted beyond the campus, once the columns appeared, the paper gained world-wide publicity.

The first known instance in English appears to be a compound form, an Oxford street name “Gropecuntlane”, documented circa 1230 (and attested through the late fourteenth century) and presumed by historians and etymologists (who don’t always agree) to indicate the place was a haunt of prostitutes, a hint “cunt” was then thought of as merely descriptive of women in a sexual context without the anatomical specificity it would later gain, something that would seem to have happened by circa 1400 because in that era it appears descriptively in medical texts.  Tying the word explicitly to female genitalia influenced general use; it was avoided in public speech (certainly in the polite circles for which records exist although this does not guarantee the pattern was replicated throughout society) by the fifteenth century and was assuredly thought obscene by the seventeenth.  Further credence to this devolution to the disreputable is that Geoffrey Chaucer (circa 1344-1400), when in the late fourteenth century writing the Canterbury Tales, used queynte without a hint he was searching for any sense of the vulgar yet within two centuries it was cited as an example of why the work was a byword for the risqué.  The word with the Middle English spelling cunte is in the early fourteenth century poem the Proverbs of Hendyng, featured in a line offering wise advice to young maidens: Ȝeue þi cunte to cunnig and craue affetir wedding (Give your cunt wisely and make (your) demands after the wedding.)

The Australian Linguistic Tradition

Unsurprisingly, the “promotional merchandise” associated with NTUnofficial's “See You in the Northern Territory” campaign did not receive the imprimatur of any level or organ of government.  The range includes wall-posters, bumper stickers, T-shirts and stubbie holders.

Long before it became the “c-word”, there was "female intercrural foramen" or, as some eighteenth century writers would have it “the monosyllable", surely the most exclusively exclusionary euphemism ever.  In less permissive times it troubled many authors and journalists and some, before “c-word” became fashionable, replaced it with something thought less strident (and there’s quite a list, men never having displayed any reticence or imaginative deficit in finding ways to disparage women or take linguistic ownership of their body parts) while other would bowdlerize, usually with variations of c**t, c*nt etc.  Lexicographers seem usually to have included an entry in their fullest or most academic dictionaries, usually with some stress on the word’s almost respectable origins, but it was often omitted from abbreviated editions, missing even from the 1933 edition of the Shorter Oxford English Dictionary.  One publication listed 552 synonyms from English slang and literature and a further half-dozen pages of the better-known from French, Dutch, German, Italian, Spanish, and Portuguese, the poetic expression of the Dutch especially putting the dour English to shame with liefdesgrot (cave of love) & vleesroos (rose of flesh).  In English-speaking countries, "cunt" is now the most offensive swear word and, although the taboo which once proscribed its use in all but among the most linguistically consensual male society has been relaxed, it remains perhaps the last true swear word and only racial (and increasingly gender-based) slurs now attract more disapprobation.  That said, evidence does suggest in certain sub-cultures, use seems at times to be both frequent and obligatory.

There is also the gunt.

The acronym FUPA references a "fatty upper pubic area" which is a normal variation in human anatomy rather than a condition and the preferred convention is to refer to such things as natural rather than normal because the latter can be a "loaded" word and recently, it emerged there can be a financial cost for those with a FUPA.  The details were revealed in a text message between a beauty salon operative (the waxer) and her client (the waxee) who had just enjoyed (the verb used in the sense of "to have had the use or benefit of something") the application of a Brazilian (an ellipsis of “Brazilian wax”, a specific style of pubic hair removal in which only a narrow strip or triangle of growth is retained on the mons pubis).  What the waxer advised was: “Just in future I’ll have to charge you a little more for the size of the area.  I hope that makes sense, nothing crazy, like $5 or $10 extra.”  The waxer’s rationale for that was based on the waxee having a FUPA which means a greater surface area.  That, in the context of performing a Brazilian, demands (1) a higher consumption of consumable product (wax), (2) more time required to apply wax and (3) more time required to remove wax.  Reaction on social media was mixed, a few arguing the economics justified the surcharge although most condemned the waxer and thought pricing should be universal with, over time, the relative few needing more wax being balanced out by the relative few needing less.  That's standard economic theory but it's doubtful pubic hair removal has ever appeared in the textbooks as a case study.  For those who find it tiresome to try to remember acronyms, a probably more mnemonic alternative comes from the ever productive world of Australian vulgar slang: gunt, the construct being g(ut) + (c)unt. 

One sub-culture in which it's suspected the c-word frequently is uttered but seldom reported is the dirty business of politics, conducted in what are still sometimes called "smoke filled rooms", a phrase once not figurative.  Bob Hawke (1929–2019; prime minister of Australia 1983-1991), not long in parliament but more ambitious than most, in 1982 enlisted the support of the Labor Party's then powerful New South Wales (NSW) right-wing "machine" to undermine the ALP's leader, Bill Hayden (b 1933; Leader of the Opposition 1977-1983) whom he famously described as "a lying cunt with a limited future."  It took a couple of goes but in 1983, Hawke prevailed.  Hayden was well acquainted with both the tactics of the NSW right and the place of lies in politics.  Once, when pointing out some inconsistency to the ALP's right-wing powerbroker (the factions preferred the appellation "coordinator") Graham Richardson (b 1949; ALP general secretary (NSW) 1976-1983), Hayden was told "...yes but we were lying to you then, today we're telling the truth."

The Hansard is the record of what is said on the floor of parliament and while not all interjections make it into print, one unrecorded homophonous gem of an exchange in the Australian parliament between Sir Winton Turnbull (1899-1980) and Gough Whitlam (1916–2014; prime minister 1972-1975) deserved to:

Sir Winton Turnbull (Country Party, Mallee): "I’m a country member and…"
Mr Gough Whitlam (ALP, Werriwa): "I remember."

Although use is now curtailed in many workplaces where once it was a standard vernacular form. the word remains a fixture in Australian English and one joke featured former National Party leader Tim Fischer (1946–2019; leader of the National Party of Australia 1990-1999) answering questions at a conference of the party's youth wing:

Delegate: "Mr Fisher, I'm the president of the Rockhampton branch of the Young Nats and I just found out we used to be called the Country Party.  Why did we change the name?"
Fisher: "Well, what to you call the Young Liberal Party?"
Delegate: "The Young Libs, Mr Fisher."
Fisher: "And what do you call the Young Democrats?"
Delegate: "The Young Dems, Mr Fisher."
Fisher: "Well, that's why we changed the name."

Rita Ora (b 1990) at the House of Holland show, London Fashion Week, September 2014.  Ms Ora combined the t-shirt with an Aztec-style & leopard-print pencil skirt with a box jacket.  Hand-distressed and screen printed in Los Angeles, the Enfants Riches Déprimés t-shirt’s list price was US$225.

Second-wave feminist authors didn’t really add anything not already known, noting it was probably the worst of the many disparaging terms attached to women and although the function of words alluding to women’s conduct (eg bitch, slut) were structurally different from those referencing their anatomy (eg cunt, tits), both were devices casually to dehumanize women by reducing them to stereotypes or body-parts, cunt the most offensive because of the reductionism; the idea that to men the rest of a woman is but a life support-system for the cunt and the sole worthwhile purpose for that, male gratification.  However, despite some activist and academic prodding, the idea that women might reclaim the word never caught the imagination and morphed into a mass-movement in the way the “slut-walks” sought to diminish the power the weaponization of the word “slut” afforded men.  That apparent reticence does suggest that despite recent linguistic permissiveness, “cunt” retains the power to repel most, even if for a good cause as it were.  Thus it endures alone in what used to be a well-populated niche and is now the English language’s last true obscenity and those who use it need to remember the impact relies on rarity, an essential part of it sounding truly obscene.  Just as Joseph Heller (1923–1999) got the most from “fuck” by using it but once in Catch-22’s (1961) 450-odd pages, “cunt” should be English’s nuclear option and if it’s any consolation to women, when used by them, “cunt” can sound its most obscene.

In the matter of Jeremy Hunt MP.

The surname “Hunt” is one which can be mispronounced.  Because of the operation of linguistic assimilation, the chance of mistake heightened if the affectionate diminutive of the given name is used when speaking of a Michael Hunt and script-writers have here and there been tempted.  In the case of a politician like the Conservative Jeremy Hunt (b 1966; UK Chancellor of the Exchequer since 2022), it may be that sometimes the “mistake” is deliberately made as a “coded” political point.  One politician with a name with such possibilities decided to avoid inter-generational transfer of the problem.  UK Labour’s Ed Balls (b 1967) in 2011 revealed his children took his wife’s surname, so to “spare them the bullying that scarred his own childhood.”

Sneaker

Sneaker (pronounced snee-ker)

(1) A high or low shoe, notionally intended to be worn when playing sport or other recreational activities, usually with a rubber or synthetic sole and uppers of canvas, leather or a synthetic material (sold as “a pair of sneakers”).

(2) One who sneaks; a “sneak”.

(3) A vessel of drink (a now archaic UK dialect form).

(4) A large cup (or small basin) with a saucer and cover (Indian English, now largely archaic).

(5) In biology, as “sneaker male”, a male animal which pretends to be a female to get close to a female, thereby increasing their chance of mating.

(6) In marine hydrology, disproportionately large coastal waves which can without warning appear in a wave train.

1550s: The construct was sneak + -er.  The origin of sneak is uncertain.  It may be from the thirteenth century Middle English sniken (to creep, to crawl), from the Old English snīcan (to creep, to crawl), from the Proto-West Germanic snīkan, from the Proto-Germanic sneikanan or snīkaną (“to creep, to crawl”) which is related to the root of both snail & snake.  Similar forms include the Danish snige (to sneak), the Swedish snika (to sneak, hanker after) and the Icelandic sníkja (to sneak, hanker after).   Alternatively, there may be a link with snitch, also of uncertain origin.  Snitch may be an alteration of the Middle English snacche (a trap, snare) or snacchen (to seize (prey)), the source of the modern English snatch.  A parallel evolution in Middle English was snik & snak (a sudden blow, snap).

The alternative etymology is as a dialectal variant of sneak.  The noun emerged in the 1590s as a development of the verb (as implied in “sneakish” in the sense of “creep or steal about privately; move or go in a stealthy, slinking way” and most etymologists have concluded it was probably a dialectal survivor from the Middle English sniken from the Old English snican, from the Proto-Germanic sneikanan.  The –er suffix was from the Middle English –er & -ere, from the Old English -ere, from the Proto-Germanic -ārijaz, thought most likely to have been borrowed from the Latin –ārius where, as a suffix, it was used to form adjectives from nouns or numerals.  In English, the –er suffix, when added to a verb, created an agent noun: the person or thing that doing the action indicated by the root verb.   The use in English was reinforced by the synonymous but unrelated Old French –or & -eor (the Anglo-Norman variant -our), from the Latin -ātor & -tor, from the primitive Indo-European -tōr.  When appended to a noun, it created the noun denoting an occupation or describing the person whose occupation is the noun.  Sneaker is a noun; the noun plural is sneakers.

Reader's Digest published a number of maps illustrating regional variations in the way things are described in the US.  While they didn't seem to indicate there was a costal v flyover linguistic divide, the Mason-Dixon line did seem to have some influence and there was something of an east-west divide.  One outlier however was "sneakers" which was found predominately to be prevalent only around the north & south Atlantic coasts, the rest of the country preferring "tennis shoes" while there were pockets in the Mid-West where "gym shoes" had traction.  The publication noted their map represented only the dominant form and that all forms (and other) could be found throughout the land.

According to Google Trends, in on-line shopping, while the numbers bounce around, they do so within a range and "sneakers" remains statistically dominant.

The noun sense of sneak as “a sneaking person; person of selfish and cowardly temper and conduct” dates from the 1640s a development from the verb; by 1700 it was used to describe “the act or practice of sneaking”.  The transitive sense of “stealthily to insert” was known by the mid-seventeenth century while that of “partake of or get surreptitiously” dates from 1883.  The phrase “to sneak up (on someone or something)” was in use by 1869.  As an adjective (in reference to feelings, suspicions etc) it was used in the sense of “not openly vowed, undemonstrative” from 1748 while the “sneak-thief” (one who enters through unsecured doors and windows to steal) was first so describe in 1859.  “Sneak previews” were originals viewings of movies held before their public release for friendly critics and others likely to provide helpful publicity, the phrase first used in 1938.

Nike Dunk SB Low Freddy Kruger (US$30,000), a tribute to the villain (or hero; opinions differ) in the Nightmare on Elm Street films, the Nike swoosh a nice allusion to the blades in the famous gloves.

The noun use of sneaker to describe certain rubber-soled shoes was in use by at least 1895 and thus (even if tangentially) linked to the use in the 1590s sense of “a sneak; one who sneaks around”).  The use for shoes was of course based on rubber-soled shoes being essentially noiseless in contrast to those which leather soles which were usually fitted with protective metal heel & toe plates to reduce wear.  A slang term for any soft-soled (usually rubber) shoe was “brothel creeper”, based on the idea that men who frequented such places preferred to do so silently so as not to be conspicuous.  The original term was actually “sneak”, first documented in accounts of prison life in 1862 as prisoners’ slang for both the wardens who at night wore “India-rubber shoes” and the shoes themselves.  The same issue was noted by the Nazi war criminals held in Spandau Prison between 1947-1987.  The prisoners had complained the heavy boots worn by the guards disturbed them but when the authorities issued rubber-soled footwear they found it harder to undertake un-noticed their many surreptitious activities.

There are a number of alternative names for the shoes.  Some are obvious such as “basketball shoes” or “tennis shoes” and “sports shoe” is a classic generic but plimsole has also endured in some places.  That was based on the “Plimlsoll Line” (originally Plimsoll’s Mark) which was a line painted on the hull of British ships to mark the point the waterline was allowed to reach before the vessel was declared overloaded.  It was named after English Liberal MP Samuel Plimsoll (1824-1898), a strident advocate of shipping reforms (many of which were codified in the Merchant Shipping Act (1876) including the “Plimsoll mark”).  Plimsoll came into use in 1907 to refer to rubber-soled, canvas shoe because the band around the shoes holding together the two parts evoked an image of the line on ships.  The spelling quickly shifted to “plimsole” because of the sound association between “soll” and “sole”.  An earlier form was “tacky” (also as “tackie”) which was probably of Dutch or Afrikaans origin, or else from tacky (slightly sticky), a quality associated with rubber, especially before the introduction of vulcanization.  In South Africa, tacky is used not only of rubber-soled shoes but also of car type and often other things made from rubber.

Lindsay Logan, nueva embajadora de Allbirds (the new Allbirds ambassador), possibly on a Wednesday.

In 2022, Allbirds appointed Lindsay Lohan as an ambassador for its "Unexpected Athlete" campaign, focusing on her for the new limited edition of its most successful sneakers (they seem to prefer "running shoe") to date, the Tree Flyer.  The promotional video issued for the announcement was nicely scripted, beginning with Ms Lohan’s perhaps superfluous admission that as an ambassador for running “I am a little unexpected" before working in a few references to her career in film (showing again a rare sense of comedic timing), fondness for peanut butter cookies and the odd social media faux-pas, many of which she's over the years embraced.  The feature shoe is the "Lux Pink" which includes no plastics.  As a well-known car driver and frequent flyer who has for years lived in an air-conditioned cocoon in Dubai, it’s not clear how far up the chart of conspicuous consumption Ms Lohan has stamped her environmental footprint but US-based footwear and apparel company Allbirds claims its design, production & distribution processes are designed to make its products as eco-friendly as possible.  It is a certified “B Corporation”, a system of private certification of for-profit companies of their "social and environmental performance" conferred by B Lab, a non-profit organization which aims to provide consumers with a reliable way to distinguish the genuinely environmentally active from those which cynically “greenwash”.

Lindsay Lohan, Allbirds “Unexpected Athlete Ambassador”.

They’re known also as “gym shoes”, “leisure shoes”, “sandshoes”, “kicks”, “trainers”, “training shoes” and running shoes and in Australia, until the 1990s, one big-selling (and still manufactured) model (the Dunlop Volley) almost universally known as “the Dunlop” and shoe shops do document the difference between “basketball shoes” and “basketball boots”, the latter with an upper built higher to afford greater protection for the ankles.  Interestingly, sneakers (however described) have become something of a cult and many expensive variations are available although analysts see to believe much of the price-tag is can be attributed to profit rather than development or production costs and, like the luxury handbag market, there are claims of “limited availability” and “restricted customer list” but most conclude that usually the only “limit” is demand although some genuine short production runs have been verified, usually for promotional purposes.  They’ve become also an item frequently stolen and among certain demographics, being assaulted so one’s sneakers can be stolen is a not uncommon experience.  Somewhat related to that cultural phenomenon has been the emergence of an after-market for “collectable” or “vintage” sneakers never to be worn and preferably still in their original packaging.  The record price paid at auction is apparently US$2.2 million but some new sneakers associated with celebrities list at as much as US$25,000, intended presumably endlessly to be traded as collectables rather than worn, much in the manner of some of the rarest exotic cars which even the manufacturers admit are produced for just that market.