Witch

Witch (pronounced wich)

(1) A person, historically either male or female but now especially a woman, who professes or is supposed to practice magic or sorcery; a sorceress (especially popular in mythology and fiction but also associated with certain societies and historical periods and still current in some countries).

(2) In the weird world of the "new age movement", a practitioner of a nature-based religion founded on ancient beliefs, which honors both a male and female divine principle and includes the practice of magic (associated especially with healing).

(3) An informal and derogatory term for an ugly, mean or wicked old woman; a hag.

(4) Used selectively, a fascinating or enchanting woman (usually in the (figurative) sense of "bewitching").

(5) A person who uses a divining rod; dowser (archaic).

(6) In the sense of "witch-hunt", an intensive effort to discover and expose disloyalty, subversion, dishonesty or the like, based usually on slight, doubtful, or irrelevant evidence.

(7) A flatfish, Pleuronectes (or Glyptocephalus) cynoglossus, of North Atlantic coastal waters, having a narrow greyish-brown body marked with tiny black spots.  The family group is Pleuronectidae (plaice, flounders etc)

(8) In geometry, a certain curve of the third order, also known as versiera.

(9) In entomology, the Indomalayan butterfly Araotes lapithis, of the Lycaenidae family.

Pre 900: From the Middle English wicche from the Old English wicce (sorceress, witch (female)), the feminine forms existing in conjunction with wicca (witch, sorcerer, wizard), the masculine deverbative from wiccian (to practice sorcery) from the Proto-Germanic wikkōną.  Related were the West Frisian wikje, wikke (to foretell, warn), the Low German wicken (to soothsay) and the Dutch wikken, wichelen (to dowse, divine).  Root was the primitive Indo-European wik-néh, derivation of weyk- (to consecrate; separate); akin to the Latin victima (sacrificial victim), the Swedish vicka (to move to and fro), the Lithuanian viẽkas (life-force) and the Sanskrit विनक्ति (vinákti) (to set apart, separate out).  Witch, witchcraft, witcher & witchery are nouns; witching is a verb & adjective and witchy is an adjective, the noun plural is witches.

The homophones “witch” & “which” are yet another pair that must make those learning English wonder how a language with so many curious anomalies became something of the planet’s lingua franca.  Which was from the Middle English which, hwic, wilche, hwilch, whilk & hwilc, from the Old English hwelċ (which), from the Proto-Germanic hwilīkaz (literally “like what” and used in the sense of “what kind”), from hwaz.  It was cognate with the Scots whilk, the West Frisian hokker, the Dutch welk, the Low German welk, the German welcher, the Danish hvilken, the Swedish vilken, the Norwegian hvilken and the Icelandic hvílíkur, all of which convey the sense of the English “which”.  “Which” is used (1) as an interrogative (seeking a choice from a limited number or group implied to be a closed set), (2) as a relative pronoun (either adding introducing clauses or referring to a whole statement or (3) as conditional or indefinite (whichever) operator used to mean any one or whichever option from a group.

An illustrative example was Sir Robert Menzies (1894–1978; Prime Minister of Australia 1939-1941 & 1949-1966) leaving a cocktail party after having been introduced to a number of visiting dignitaries from the Balkans, confessing to his companion he’d be unlikely to recall: “which ‘vitch’ was which”.  In English, the choice between “that” and “which” often baffles but the convention is “that” is used when introducing a restrictive (essential) clause and “which” when the clause is non-restrictive.  To illustrate that (1): “The car that has the red interior is mine” (the clause identifies which car) and (2) “The car, which has a red interior, is mine” (identity of car already certain).  However, “which vs that” is more a convention of style than a hard grammatical “law” and a handy rule of thumb is (1) if “that” can be removed from a sentence without compromising meaning, it should be removed, (2) if a comma exists, use “which” and (3) if there’s no comma, used “that”.  That will please most people most of the time.

An obviously guilty witch haranguing the court, lithograph of a witch trial in Salem, Massachusetts, circa 1692.

The OED (Oxford English Dictionary) does note the generally accepted etymology is not without phonetic or semantic difficulties and suggests some connection with the Old English wigle (divination) and wig & wih (idol), the nouns representing a Proto-Germanic wikkjaz (necromancer) (one who wakes the dead) from the primitive Indo-European weg-yo from weg (to be strong, be lively).  That wicce once had a more specific sense than the later general one of "female magician, sorceress" is suggested by the presence of other words in Old English describing more specific kinds of magical craft.  “Witch doctor” is from circa 1715; from the mid 1830s it was applied to African “healers by means of spells & potions”, soon becoming interchangeable with “medicine man”.  The fear of witches and witchcraft is described as wiccaphobia and neither phobia nor subject has ever been mentioned in the APA’s (American Psychiatric Association) DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) although that’s not unusual, the DSM not listing phobias as distinct diagnostic identities but instead providing diagnostic criteria for categorizing phobias listed under five headings: (1) animal type, (2) natural environment type, (3) blood-injection-injury type, (4) situational type & (5) other types.  Depending on the patient's circumstances, a clinician presumably would place their wiccaphobia in either (4) or (5).

Poster for the movie Warlock (1989).  In Hollywood, warlocks are men and witches are women.

However, although "witchcraft" and "witch" may not appear in the DSM, both terms did once make frequent appearances in the literature of medicine and psychiatry.  Historically, at least some of those accused of practicing witchcraft in the Middle Ages and early modern period are thought to have been experiencing conditions such as severe depression, epilepsy, or psychosis; rather than being condemned as witches, they’d now be diagnosed with a neurological or mental illnesses.  In the modern era, clinicians are trained to detect the difference between true psychotic delusions (a manifestation of irrational phobias) and beliefs a product of cultural or religious conditioning.  Sometimes seriously and sometimes less so, there have been scholars and other critics (including ex-patients) of modern psychiatry who have compared the DSM to the old “witch-hunting” texts, the classic example the Malleus Maleficarum.  Written by German Dominican friar and inquisitor Heinrich Kramer (circa 1430-1505), the widely-read treatise Malleus Maleficarum (Hammer of Witches, 1487), not only described the rituals of witchcraft but was also a manual for the identification of witches, documenting methods by which their guilt could be proven (as a prelude to execution).  Scholars now regard Malleus Maleficarum not as original but a kind of “review of the classics” and a codification of many previous works but the publication long exerted much influence on the witch trials of the early modern period.  Kramer was on sound theological and political ground because early as the tenth century the Church had published Canon Episcopi (Canon Law) in which it was made explicit witchcraft and magic were delusions and practitioners (or even believers) were suffering “possession by the Devil”.

To gain a flavour of the Malleus Maleficarum, consider the representative extract: “What else is woman but a foe to friendship, an inescapable punishment, a necessary evil, a natural temptation, a desirable calamity, a domestic danger, a delectable detriment, an evil of nature, painted in fair colors...The word woman is used to mean the lust of the flesh, as it is said: I have found a woman more bitter than death, and a good woman more subject to carnal lust...Women are naturally more impressionable...Women are intellectually like children...She is more carnal than a man, as is clear from her many carnal abominations...Therefore a wicked woman is by her nature quicker to waver in her faith, and consequently quicker to abjure the faith, which is the root of witchcraft...”  One does suspect copies of the Malleus Maleficarum might sit well-thumbed on the bedside tables of Talibs in Kabul and ayatollahs in Tehran.  They know the old ways are best.

The old ways are best: Malleus Maleficarum.

The comparison between Malleus Maleficarum and the DSM is the claim both are guidebooks used by an elite to label and classify nonconformity or social deviance as “abnormal” and thus to be “treated” (sometimes by incarceration).  Structuralists note one interesting aspect of this is the “imprimatur of veracity” provided by the written word, both Kramer’s text and the DSM gaining their authority from being hefty published works.  While Malleus Maleficarum faded from use, the DSM’s seven decade evolution from DSM-I (1952: 130 pages listing 106 mental disorders) to DSM-5-TR (2022: 1152 pages and 298 disorders) has been one of increasing influence to the point that, in the minds of many, it is definitive.  The “mission creep” of the DSM has attracted comment and while whether there’s now “more madness” or what there now is more readily identified and better treated can be debated, the growth of the profession also accounts for some of the spread, doctors sometimes in demarcation disputes about who gets to treat whom: With each addition to the DSM the psychiatrists get to stake their claim to another market segment and in the twenty-first century, the DSM seems as canonical a text as was Malleus Maleficarum in the sixteenth.

In 2015, Nylon ran the story Lindsay Lohan had taken up witchcraft and wished to be consecrated by a coven as a white witch.  Nylon did caution the source of the story was the National Enquirer, a publication sometimes referred to as a NRS (normally reliable source) with some irony; a representative for Ms Lohan released a statement denying she practiced witchcraft.  Published continuously since 1926, since the early 2000s the National Enquirer has been a good source of Lohanic content, its coverage extending to her weight (suggestions of anorexia during “thin phase”), driving history (patchy), being stalked by the Freemasons (verified), feuds (frequent), legal issues (since resolved), family squabbles (legion), hair care (highly recommended), shoe & handbag collections (much envied) and, of course, aspiration to be admitted to a coven of witches (dubious).  

Women being burned at the stake (circa 1580), engraving by Dutch illustrator Jan Luyken (1649–1712).  Widely practiced in parts of Europe, in England, burnings at the stake tended to be restricted to those convicted of heresy, convicted witches usually hanged (if they survived the various "trials by ordeal" used to establish guilt).

The glossary of the Laws of Ælfred (circa 890) translates the Latin necromantia (demonum invocatio) as galdre or wiccecræft and in the Anglo-Saxon poem Men's Crafts, wiccræft appears to mean "skill with horses" so the OED is right to note the contested history but, in the history of the British Isles, the mention in the Laws of Ælfred of witchcraft being exclusively female activity is unique although that sense clearly endured and by the early 1600s, the feminine form was so dominant that the forms "men-witches" or "he-witches" came into use.  Warlock was never a universally accepted masculine form of witch despite the notion in modern popular culture and it’s from wicca that English ultimately gained both wizard and wicked.  Even in the sixteenth century, the implications were blurred, Reginald Scot in his The Discoverie of Witchcraft (1584) asserting it was synonymous in the English tongue to say either “she is a witch” or “she is a wise woman”.  In the popular imagination there's still a widespread perception witches were burned at the stake and while that was the case in many places (along with other methods of dispatch), in the English-speaking world, because witchcraft was a felony in both England and the American colonies, witches were hanged and not burned.  Witches’ bodies were burned in Scotland, although, just to be sure, they were first strangled to death.  The confusion may have arisen because there were cases of witches being burned at the stake but that was because they'd been convicted also of heresy.

Crooked Hillary Clinton (b 1947; US secretary of state 2009-2013) has never denied practicing witchcraft (digitally altered image).

The extended sense of “young woman or girl of bewitching aspect or manners” was in use by at least 1740 and although that sense has been used both admiringly (of “feminine charms) and as a warning (of the power of a seductress over men) it seems now usually positive and of “ways & means” rather than merely the Paris Hiltonesque “hot”.  It’s certainly more encouraging than the use in the Old Testament in which appears מְכַשֵּׁפָה (mekhashshepheh, in the Hebrew the feminine term for an “enchantress or sorceress”.  The word was from the root כשף (kashaph) and used to refer to those who whispered mystic formulas or cast spells, antics that attracted one of the more famous (and consequential) biblical injunctions: “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.” (Exodus 22:18; King James Version of the Bible (KJV, 1611)).  A similar condemnation also appears in Deuteronomy 18:10-12:

10 There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch.

11 Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.

12 For all that do these things are an abomination unto the Lord: and because of these abominations the Lord thy God doth drive them out from before thee.

The verse “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live” echoed through time, the Mosaic legal decree held to command the execution of those practicing sorcery or illicit magic.  In the archaic English of the KJV, “suffer” means “allow or permit”, thus the understanding “Do not allow a sorceress to live”.  However, scripture is open to interpretation and, for thousands of years, priests, theologians (amateur & professional), lawyers and charlatans (there’s some overlap between those categories) have done exactly that and adding to the tangle is the history of variations in translation and meaning-shifts in words.  In the ancient Septuagint (a translation in Ancient Greek), the Hebrew word was translated as pharmakos (a brewer of lethal potions, drugs, or poisons) leading some scholars argue the verse targeted “dark herbalists” (ie those who literally mixed poisons) while others held this was metaphorical and still explicitly proscribed (on pain of death) supernatural sorcery.  The latter (harsher) view is more in accord with the spirit of Deuteronomy in which it was made clear all must follow the teachings in the tradition of the prophet Moses, meaning all divination and magical techniques of enquire must be eliminated on the grounds such things were “spiritual treason”.  For the ancient Israelites, spells and magical incantations were attempts to bypass God's authority by manipulating spiritual forces or a summoning of pagan deities, sorcery thus a form of idolatry that threatened the purity of the community.  Of course the commentaries have always emphasised execution of transgressors must be judicial with the accused granted due process; neither in Exodus or Deuteronomy is licence granted for vigilantism or mob justice.

The historical legacy of Exodus 22:18 was profound and lingered long in Western culture.  It was James I (1566–1625;King of England 1603-1625) who commissioned the translation still influential as the KJV and he was a religious zealot both fearful of and somewhat obsessed with the dangers in witchcraft; translating mekhashepha specifically as “witch” reinforced the secular laws of his time and on both sides of the Atlantic, European inquisitors and American Puritans alike, cited Exodus 22:18 as the primary biblical justification to hunt, torture, and execute thousands (mostly women) accused of witchcraft.  Delivered mostly by the European colonialists, scripture (often selectively quoted) spread to other continents and to this day, Akan Christians in Ghana justify praying for the death and destruction of witches and wizards of the basis of “not suffering witches to live”.  In some places where the scriptural condemnation of witches became better embedded in culture than the companion notion of "due process before punishment", mobs not infrequently assemble and kill those accused of witchcraft, parts of Africa and PNG (Papua New Guinea) especially afflicted.  In some cases the killings are opportunistic and based on other motives including "blood feuds" and economics, inconvenient wives sometimes murdered so a family can gain title to her land.      

Peter Dutton, carrying volume one (of three) of his enemies list (volume two including several witches).

In Australia, Peter Dutton (b 1970; leader of the opposition and leader of the Australian Liberal Party 2022-2025) had something of an unfortunate history with text messages (SMS, short message service) including sending one calling a journalist a “mad fucking witch”.  Unfortunately, he sent the text to the target of his thoughts but, fortunately, the witch worked for Liberal Party supervisor Rupert Murdoch (b 1931) and thus had to cop it sweet which, with some aplomb, the witch did, even complimenting Mr Dutton for having been a minister who had made "a great contribution to government" (one way of putting things).  Mr Dutton's SMS was especially interesting because there's an extensively documented library of the links between Freemasonry and witchcraft and, despite many opportunities, Mr Dutton has never denied being a Freemason.  Whether it can be said Mr Dutton’s truly made "a great contribution to government" (examples don't readily come to mind), in coining “mad fucking witch” he certainly made a notable contribution to the political lexicon and, unlike most of what he said and did over his well-remunerated decades in public life, the phrase proved enduring, albeit as an “unintended consequence”.

In Australia, MFW (Mad Fucking Witches) is a political pressure group targeting media figures usually described as “right wing” and although the label can be misleading, those attracting the attention of the MFW generally are port of the “populist vibe”, a movement not sympathetic to the “progressive” issues though the preserve of the (again nominal) “left wing”.  The MFW approach comes from the playbook of BDS (boycott, divestment & sanctions) community and their preferred tactic since 2016 has been the “collective boycott”, a technique in which companies are pressured not to advertise on programmes or outlets that have attracted their disapproval.  So it’s an attempt at a kind of censorship but the MFW’s stated position is those using the media to advocate, support or at least “dog whistle” world views such as “sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia, and all forms of hate and bigotry” should not tolerated and have no right to claim the protection of the liberal concept of “free speech”.  Potential MFW supporters should note the coven's position is both men and women can be consecrated as witches and it'll be interesting to see if a kind of “anti-MFW” emerges from the  “manosphere” (a MFW enemy) as the “Mad Fucking Warlocks”.  On X (previously known as Twitter), #witches-vs-warlocks would be a battle worth following.   

MFW merchandise.  Rupert Murdoch too has feelings and must find the Tee-shirts hurtful.  Those concerned should send him an appropriate emoji.  

Presumably the MFW wouldn’t claim the quote attributed to French philosopher Voltaire (François-Marie Arouet; 1694–1778): “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it” is “wrong” but, on the basis “one has to draw the line somewhere” (a dictum with a long history in “free speech” matters), would maintain it is “wrong” for corporations financially to support individuals or media outlets disseminating “hate speech”.  Actually, the quote was a paraphrase of Voltaire’s views on the principle of freedom of speech and was coined by Evelyn Beatrice Hall (1868–1956, who used the pseudonym Stephen “S.G.” Tallentyre), appearing in her book The Friends of Voltaire (1906); whether that history is enough for the coven to deny Ms Hall the status of “honorary Mad Fucking Witch” isn’t something discussed on their website (on which is merchandise available, including the “Fuck Murdoch” Tee-shirts made famous by #MeToo activist Grace Tame (b 1994 and at least a MFW fellow-traveller).

The MFW will not be unaware of analysis suggesting at least some of the “hate spewing” commentators choose their content not out of political conviction but merely because it has proved the most lucrative and happily they’d shift to broadcasting something diametrically different if that path proved to be the “money trail”.  The outlets are in the business of producing a product (their audience) to sell (to advertisers) and if a bigger audience could be produced by running recordings of a philosopher and archbishop discussing the existence of God than what's generated by conspiracy theories and rants about this & that (immigrants, trans-people etc), that's what would be run.  However, the MFW is a coven of structural functionalists for whom motivation is irrelevant and what matters is content: “Every single advertiser who pays advertising dollars to a company which spreads dangerous anti-science rhetoric, hate speech, fake news and lies is complicit in the spread of that information … their responsibility is to ensure their money only goes to media organisations with morals and a social conscience.”  Pleasingly for pattern theorists, both Donald Trump (b 1946; POTUS 2017-2021 and since 2025) and the MFW seek to eradicate “fake news” although while some of their methods may be similar, the definitions and targets differ.  The MFW has pledged also to “rid the world of authoritarianism”, possibly with Mr Trump in the coven’s collective thoughts.

The MFW doesn't make a “call to arms”; the coven calls witches: “To your brooms”.

Of course companies have for a long time been using either the withdrawal of advertising or the threat to do so as a weapon (sometimes deployed with subtlety, sometimes not) to influence “coverage of products” and governments have not been above directing their advertising to publications thought “sympathetic”.  There are terms for those methods but the MFW is an interesting case-study of the way blogs, social media and such have created a kind of “equivalency” between the new “micro-operations” and media outlets with storied histories in some cases dating back centuries.  What makes the MFW campaign(s) structurally different is they’re often focused on the “old media” of radio and terrestrial television, technologies possible only because they are licenced (by governments) exclusively to use a publicly-owned resource (the airwaves) and conditions are imposed on those so licenced, including the general concept of “responsible” use; many individuals and some institutions have views on the parameters of “responsible” (some even codifying things) and the MFW’s strident position is just one of many.  One “codified” document in Australia is commercial radio’s 31-page Code of Practice, a work highly-detailed, frequently ignored and often interpreted on the basis of: “Can we get away with it?”  The MFW have noted this and claim they exist only because the outlets refuse to “regulate themselves” and “regulators failing to discharge their statutory duties”.  Although there is something of the now familiar “agree with us or we’ll cancel you” approach about the MFW, many wish them success, not because they find their targets a political threat but because they’re such ghastly vulgarians. 

Witches and ditches

Witch of the Ditch on broomstick.

Early Reader’s paperback edition of the children's book The Witch of the Ditch by by Steven Butler, illustrated by Nigel Baines.  The early reader series uses a hybrid format in being “stepping stones” designed for children transitioning from picture books to text, the method being associative (illustrations the young reader can identify orally, presented alongside the relevant written word(s)). Appropriately deconstructed, the book is a tale of political conflict, triggered when one witch (Hag of the Crag) moves in next door to another (Witch of the Ditch).  As is notorious, there is in every town room only for one witch so things are not going to go well.  Politicians may be tempted to mine The Witch of the Ditch in the quest for new 3WSs (three word slogans) because that's how political discourse is now done and they’ll find encouraging the publisher’s blurb noting the title is for a “Reading age: 5-7 years”, about the level of comprehension they appear to think most voters have attained.

Ditch Witch at work.

Described by the manufacturer as “The fastest way to drill”, CEA’s Ditch Witch JT21 replaces the previous JT20, the design improvements said to have been “engineered with direct input from contractors and drillers in the field.”  Drills of all types (from the smallest able to put holes in nano-sized objects to the largest used to carve through solid granite when excavating tunnels) are arranged in classes and CEA claim the JT21 “sets a new benchmark for performance, speed, and control in compact drilling”, its “35% faster carriage speed” able to operate at a “blazing 215 feet (66 metres) per minute”, making it “the fastest drill in its class”.  One measure likely novel to those familiar with HP (horsepower) in other contexts is the concept of DHP (downhole horsepower), a measure of the specific efficiency delivered at the critical point (the drill bit); in that it’s analogous with RWHP (rear-wheel horsepower), the traditional metric used by dynamometers quantifying power and a measure more indicative of performance potential than GHP (gross horsepower, what a engine generates in its raw configuration) or NHP (net horsepower, measured with an engine’s accessories attached).  Certainly the Ditch Witch’s stated ratings (21,000 lbs of pullback, 20,000 lbs of thrust, and 2,250 ft-lbs of torque) sound impressive.  The JT21 is also a most modern machine, featuring VAM (Virtually Assisted Make-up, a software-driven pipe handling apparatus that renders redundant floats or sensors).  Pleasingly for those brought up on video games, the JT21 is controlled by a multimode joystick and LCD (liquid crystal display) interface.

Digging a better trench.

Winston Churchill inspecting the progress of project White Rabbit No, 6, Clumber Park, Nottinghamshire, England, November 1941.

In “Ditch Witch” CEA came up with a catchy name, one that would have appealed to word-nerd Winston Churchill (1875-1965; UK prime-minister 1940-1945 & 1951-1955), had there not been a need for secrecy.  The World War II (1939-1945) era White Rabbit No. 6 was an “trench digging” engineering project co-ordinated by the British Admiralty although, as a security measure, the official code-name was changed to “Cultivator No. 6” to make it sound less mysterious and more like just another a piece of agricultural equipment.  It was a military trench-digging machine, an example of the adage “generals are always preparing to fight the last war” and although designed exclusively for army use on (and at least partially under) land, it came under the auspices of the RN (Royal Navy) because it was one of the many “good ideas” from the brain of Churchill who, between the outbreak of war in 1939 and his assumption of the premiership some months later, served as First Lord of the Admiralty (the RN’s political head).  Trenches and artillery had been the two dominant features of World War I (1914-1918) and Churchill had spent some months (1915-1916) in one of the former under fire from the latter while commanding a battalion; before the implications of mechanization and the German’s Blitzkrieg (lightning war) tactics were apparent, he assumed the new war in France would unfold something like the old, thus the interest in something which would “revolutionize trench warfare”.

Clipart of sexy Halloween witches (PNG (portable network graphics) format, transparent, 300 DPI (dots-per-inch)) can be downloaded.

Trench warfare however wasn’t repeated so White Rabbit No.6 was soon realized to be already obsolete so the project was abandoned and although the most fully developed of the prototypes did perform according to the design parameters, whether it would have been effective remains doubtful; remarkably, work on these things wasn’t wholly abandoned until 1942.  The “White Rabbit” project codes came from Churchill’s sense of humor, his ideas flowing, as he said: “like rabbits I pull from my hat” and he supported many, some of which were of great military value while others, like the “floating runways” (artificial icebergs made with a mixture of shards of timber & frozen water), were quixotic.  The gestation of the White Rabbit was also an echo of World War I when, in an earlier incarnation as First Lord, Churchill had instructed the Admiralty to begin development of the first “tank”.  The word “tank” was adopted to create the impression the project was about “water tanks” and while it may seem strange to put admirals in charge of what was so obviously a “land weapon”, it was the navy that possessed the expertise in fabricating similar devices (the gun turrets used on warships) and the boat-sized engines that would be used to propel them.

Bronwyn Bishop (b 1942, left), Sophie Mirabella (b 1968) and Tony Abbott (right) at the infamous “Ditch the Witch” protest, 2011.

Tony Abbott (b 1957; Prime Minister of Australia 2013-2015) rarely saw a 3WS he didn’t like and, in 2011, apparently had no compunction in being photographed in front of a placard with the words “Ditch the Witch”, the occasion a “No Carbon Tax” protest, called after Julia Gillard (b 1961; Prime Minister of Australia 2010-2013) had announced such a tax would be imposed, despite having earlier promised there’d be no such tax.  Clearly it must have been a "non-core promise", another Australian contribution to political jargon.  Also displaying the depth of the Australian linguistic imagination (if not grasp of the rules of punctuation) was one reading “Juliar….Bob Browns [sic] Bitch”.  The construct of Juliar was Ju(lia) + liar (alluding to the broken promise) and “Bitch” a reference to the allegation her government was too inclined to be influenced by the Green Party, then led by Dr Bob Brown (b 1944; senator for Tasmania (Australian Greens) 1996-2012, Green party leader 2005-2015).  “Bitch” was also a slur, a snide comment on Dr Brown’s homosexuality.

Tony Abbott (b 1957; Prime Minister of Australia 2013-2015) agitprop.

Mr Abbott's combination of relentless negativity and repetition of 3WSs (three word slogans) contributed to his resounding victory in the 2013 general election although, in office, the results were mixed and it ended badly.  Recently revived as the Liberal Party's federal president (the institution's third “Lazerus with a triple bypass” after Sir Robert Menzies (1894–1978; Prime Minister of Australia 1939-1941 & 1949-1966) and John Howard (b 1939; Prime Minister of Australia 1996-2007)), Mr Abbott unquestionably was one of history's most effective leaders of the opposition but as Roy Jenkins (1920–2003) remarked of Lord Randolph Churchill (1849–1895):  “He was essentially a opposition politician and behaved as such even when in government”.  Of such matters, Jenkins was a fair judge.   

“Witch Doctor” was  for several successful seasons campaigned in drag racing by Dr Keith Garner (b 1935), a Cherokee, Iowa-based physician.

A 1970 Ford Torino Cobra, it was ordered from the factory explicitly configured to optimize performance over quarter-mile (402 metres) runs: 429 cubic inch (7.0 litre) Super Cobra Jet V8 (J-code), C6 automatic transmission & 3.91 Drag Pack 9 inch rear end (V code).  The styling cues were “borrowed” by Ford Australia for the two-door hardtop version of the Falcon (XA, XB & XC, 1972-1979), the lines proving aerodynamically efficient on even the fastest circuits.  Unfortunately, the second generation Torino (1970-1971), while untroubled on drag strips where speeds didn’t exceed 125 mph (200 km/h), on the big NASCAR (National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing) ovals where 200 mph (320 km/h) routinely was approached, the shape induced unexpectedly high drag, despite looking sleeker than its slab-sided predecessor (1968-1969); where possible, racing teams opted to run the old body.

Preaching to the converted: One-time seminarian Mr Abbott gets the message across.

Standing with Mr Abbott, Liberal Party luminaries Bronwyn Bishop and Sophie Mirabella presumably regarded the words “witch” & “bitch” as “political” rather than “sexist”.  That view wasn’t shared by Ms Gillard who later remarked: “I wasn't shocked that some people had those sentiments…” but was, “…shocked that it was so visibly called forth into the public debate and that it didn't get the sort of odium from mainstream commentators that it should have.”  The signage also rated a mention in her strident “misogyny speech”, delivered in the parliament on 9 October 2012 as a reaction then opposition leader Mr Abbott accusing her of sexism.  Actually, she “had a bit of previous” with sexism (notably the “mincing poodle” affair) but the speech was a good performance and around the planet it went viral.  At the time of the “Ditch the Witch” rally, Ms Gillard of course received the expected support from her ALP (Australian Labor Party) party colleagues although Ms Bishop and Ms Mirabella seem to have been unmoved.  One at the time vocal in her condemnation of the signage was Penny Wong (b 1968), then serving in the Gillard cabinet and, as a woman, she would be expected to be sensitive to hints of misogyny.  Gillard of course had only that to resort to when weaponizing “an identity” whereas Wong could play (1) “the woman card”, (2) the “race card” (being of part-Asian extraction) or “the gay card” (being a lesbian).  Still her support must have been appreciated as gesture of feminist solidarity.  Unfortunately, Gillard’s problems got worse and the rest of the country noticed; so did her party colleagues and, in a leadership spill in June 2013, she lost the leadership, Ms Wong among those voting for the alternative.  Feminist solidarity goes only so far when there’s the threat of a big pay cut and the loss of perks.

Briefly in 2026, one of the few pleasures to be see when waiting to catching one's bus in Melbourne.

Genuinely a piece of Australian political history, the “Ditch the Witch” 3WS in 2026 made an unexpected return the streets of Melbourne, appearing on the sides of trucks trundling through the suburbs.  The target this time was Jacinta Allan (b 1973; premier of Victoria since 2023), the lucky recipient of the poisoned chalice of the state’s premiership, handed to her after the retirement of the long-serving Daniel Andrews (b 1972), premier of Victoria 2014-2023.  Several political junkies have been compiling reports with calculations attempting to work out just how much public money has been squandered / stolen / misappropriated / wasted (the terms vary with the author) during the life of the Andrews/Allan government.  While not all the various “incidents” suggest dishonesty (some being mere incompetence), the alleged losses variously are in the thousands, millions or billions.  Ms Allan has made little attempt to address substantive matters (such as the rising state debt) but was most vociferous in her objection to the revival of the “Ditch the Witch” 3WS with her scowling visage appended; within 48 hours the offending images had been banished from the streets although whether that was achieved with threats, persuasion or the premier casting a spell isn’t certain.  In an indication her government had a focus on “high priority issues”, it was announced Aus$134,000 (US$95,000) had been allocated to erect a bronze statue of Mr Andrews.

Despite the impression created by popular culture (especially film & television), the “witch = female, warlock = male” thing is quite modern and thus historically misleading; Ms Gillard and Ms Allan are clearly very modern, thus their equating “witch” with “woman” and its use as a slur as sexism.  For most of the history of the English language, a “witch” could be male or female although the record does suggest women were more often accused of witchcraft, while “warlock” often was not applied to male witches.  In the Old English (certainly before circa 1000), the most common forms were wicca (male practitioner of witchcraft) and wicce (female practitioner) both from the same Germanic root; by the late Middle English (and after the Norman Conquest (1066), gradually the forms merged in pronunciation, the spelling shifting to reflect this, “witch” coming to denote either sex.  That’s why there came to be no need for a separate masculine noun.

Macbeth and the three witches (1760), oil on canvas by Francesco Zuccarelli (1702-1788).  Completed during the artist's “first English period” (1752-1762), historians believe this to be the first European painting depicting theatrical characters in a landscape and in From Rococo to Revolution: Major Trends in Eighteenth-Century Painting (1966), English art historian Sir Michael Levey (1927–2008; director of the National Gallery 1973-1986) notes the work as a fine example of “the beginnings of the Neo-Gothic under the influence of the theory of the sublime.”  When writing The Tragedy of Macbeth (Macbeth, circa 1606) William Shakespeare (1564–1616) had no doubts witches were women.

In the Laws of Ælfred, witchcraft explicitly was singled out as a woman's craft, the practitioners of which were not welcome to live among the Western Saxons but that can’t have been persuasive and it’s clear from later legal and theological writings (fields in which there was long cross-fertilization) that men were a capable as women of practicing witchcraft (the English Witchcraft Act (1604) refers only to “any person”).  Those accused (and sometimes executed) overwhelmingly were women and the numbers in Europe were striking (albeit with wide regional variations), the margin over decades sometimes as skewed as 90-10%.  Of course these are raw numbers from the surviving historic record so while there’s (probably not unreasonably) now the perception women disproportionately were targeted for prosecution, it’s not impossible there simply were more women than men practicing witchcraft.  Popular culture is just as divergent from history in the evolution of “warlock”.  Warlock was from the Old English wǣrloga (oath-breaker; traitor; deceiver) and was related to the notion of “belie one's pledge” rather than magic spells but because of the Biblical association of “deceiver” with Satan, in certain medieval religious texts, wǣrloga was used to mean “the Devil”.

Witches and Witchcraft in Victorian Britain by Emma Woodhouse is scheduled for publication in April 2027.  In Jane Austen's (1775-1817) novel Emma (1815), Emma Woodhouse was the titular protagonist of almost 21, described by the author as “a heroine whom no-one but myself will much like.”

The origin of “warlock” being equated with “man practising witchcraft” seems to be in early sixteenth century Scots English but even there it was never the standard form with the church and court records of the time listing men so accused as “witches”, as was the case in England and Wales.  Charmingly, literary historians trace the emergence of “warlock” meaning “a male witch” to the rise of Gothic novel, a form which enjoyed a spike in popularity between the 1760s and 1820s; witches were mentioned in Gothic novel and Warlocks were not but from those beginnings came the “ghost” & “horror” genres and historians have concluded the Victorian writers, mining the occult, folklore, medievalism, picked-up “warlock” for no better reason than it sounded archaic and had the “picturesque” quality novelists like.  From this improbable beginning, “warlock” became vested with an almost wholly bogus “history” readers allowing themselves to be convinced stretched back a thousand years or more.  Victorian novels were however a niche and what’s thought most to have reinforced the popular perception was twentieth century cinema, an industry which cemented the witch/warlock dichotomy, adhered to in fantasy fiction, role-playing games, comics and popular culture of all forms.

Hot Dog

Hot dog (pronounced hot-dawg)

(1) A frankfurter.

(2) A sandwich consisting of a frankfurter (or some sort of sausage of similar shape) in a split roll, eaten usually with (1) mustard, sauerkraut & relish or (2) mustard & ketchup.

(3) Someone who performs complex, showy, and sometimes dangerous manoeuvres, especially in surfing or skiing (hotdogging sometimes a defined class in competition).

(4) Someone thought a show-off, especially in sporting competition.

(5) In informal use, an expression of joy, admiration or delight (occasionally also used ironically in the manner of “that’s great”).

(6) In New Zealand, a battered, deep-fried sausage or saveloy on a stick (essentially the same concept as the US corn dog and the Australian Dagwood dog).

(7) In slang, the human penis, a variation of which is the “man sausage”.

(8) In slang, a sexually suggestive physical gesture involving hip movement (usually as hotdogging).

1894: A coining in US English for commercial purposes, the idea being the vague resemblance of the sausage to a dachshund dog, the “hot” from the traditional use of mustard as a condiment although there’s evidence the early suspicion some hot dogs included actual canine meat weren’t entirely without foundation.  The use as (1) an interjection expressing joy, admiration or delight was another US creation dating from around the turn of the twentieth century (the circumstances unknown) and (2) a descriptor of someone who performs showy, often dangerous stunts was also an Americanism from the same era.  It seems to have begin in sport and is still widely used but has become best known for its use in skiing and surfing where it’s institutionalized to the extent some competitive categories have been named thus.  The variation “hot diggety dog” (also clipped to “hot diggety” was used in the same sense as the interjection “hot dog”, the interpolated “diggety” there for emphasis and rhetorical effect.  The slang synonyms (mostly in the US and not applied exclusively to hot dogs) have included “tubular meat on a bun”, “frank”, “frankfurt”, “frankfurter”, “glizzy”, “pimp steak”, “tube steak”, “wiener”, “weeny”, “ballpark frank”, “cheese coney”, “cheese dog”, “Chicago-style”, “Chicago dog”, “chili dog”, “Coney Island”, “corndog”, “footlong”, “junkyard dog”, “not dog”, “pig in a blanket”, “steamie” “veggie dog” & “frankfurter in a bun”.  In informal use, both single word contractions (hotdog) and hyphenated forms (hot-dog, hot-dogger etc) are common and “hot dog!” as an interjection is heard in the US, especially south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

Extra mustard: Lindsay Lohan (during "brunette phase") garnishing her hot dog, New York, 2010.

The construct was hot + dog.  Hot was from the Middle English hot & hat, from the Old English hāt, from the Proto-Germanic haitaz (hot), from the primitive Indo-European kay- (hot; to heat) and was cognate with the Scots hate & hait (hot), the North Frisian hiet (hot), the Saterland Frisian heet (hot), the West Frisian hjit (hot), the Dutch heet (hot), the Low German het (hot), the German Low German heet (hot), the German heiß (hot), the Danish hed (hot), the Swedish het (hot) and the Icelandic heitur (hot).  Dog was from the Middle English dogge (source also of the Scots dug (dog)), from the Old English dogga & docga of uncertain origin.  Interestingly, the original sense appears to have been of a “common dog” (as opposed one well-bred), much as “cur” was later used and there’s evidence it was applied especially to stocky dogs of an unpleasing appearance.

New Jersey Hot Dog periodic table.

Etymologists have pondered the origin:  It may have been a pet-form diminutive with the suffix -ga (the similar models being compare frocga (frog) & picga (pig), appended to a base dog-, or doc-(the origin and meaning of these unclear). Another possibility is Old English dox (dark, swarthy) (a la frocga from frog) while some have suggested a link to the Proto-West Germanic dugan (to be suitable), the origin of Old English dugan (to be good, worthy, useful), the English dow and the German taugen; the theory is based on the idea that it could have been a child’s epithet for dogs, used in the sense of “a good or helpful animal”.  Few support that and more are persuaded there may be some relationship with docce (stock, muscle), from the Proto-West Germanic dokkā (round mass, ball, muscle, doll), from which English gained dock (stumpy tail).  In fourteenth century England, hound (from the Old English hund) was the general word applied to all domestic canines while dog referred to some sub-types (typically those close in appearance to the modern mastiff and bulldog.  By the sixteenth century, dog had displaced hound as the general word descriptor. The latter coming to be restricted to breeds used for hunting and in the same era, the word dog was adopted by several continental European languages as their word for mastiff.  Unmodified, the English Hot Dog has been borrowed by dozens of languages.  Hot dog is a noun, verb & adjective, hotdoggery & hotdogger are nouns, hotdogging & hotdogged are verbs; the noun plural is hot dogs.

For the 2016 Texas State Fair, the manufacturer went retro, reviving the "Corny Dog" name although, in a sign of the times, vegetarian dogs were available.

The corn-dog (a frankfurter dipped in cornmeal batter, fried, and served on a stick), although the process was patented in 1927, seems to have come into existence between 1938-1942 (the sources differ with most preferring the latter) but it received a lexicographical imprimatur of when it began to appear in dictionaries in 1949 and it was certainly on sale (then as the “corny dog”) at the 1942 Texas State Fair.  In Australia, the local variation of the US corn dog is the Dagwood dog (a batter-covered hot dog sausage, deep fried in batter, dipped in tomato sauce and eaten off a wooden stick), not to be confused with the “battered sav”, a saveloy deep fried in a wheat flour-based batter (as used for fish and chips and which usually doesn’t contain cornmeal).  The Dagwood Dog was named after a character in the American comic strip Blondie.  Dagwood, Blondie’s ineptly comical husband, did have a dog albeit not one especially sausage-like and it may simply have been it was at the time the country’s best known or most popular cartoon dog.

The hot dog as class-identifier: David Cameron showing how the smart set handle a hot dog while on the campaign trail, April 2015.

After leaving Downing Street, Harold Macmillan (1894–1986; UK prime-minister 1957-1963) visited Lyndon Johnson (LBJ, 1908–1973; VPOTUS 1961-1963 & POTUS 1963-1969) in the White House and was served lunch, a meal the former prime minister found so remarkable that his account of the recollection warranted a rare exclamation mark: "Hot dogs!"  He didn’t comment further but it’s assumed his experience of the culinary treat must have been the Old Etonian’s first and last.  It wouldn't however have been meal unfamiliar to old LBJ who, on the opening day (13 April) of the 1964 MLB (Major League Baseball) season at Washington DC’s District of Columbia Stadium (now the Robert F. Kennedy Memorial Stadium), set the record for the most hot dogs eaten by a president on Opening Day, all four scoffed down without resort to knife & fork.  The record still stands, something which must not have been brought to the attention of Donald Trump (b 1946; POTUS 2017-2021 and since 2025) because, if he knew, there would have been a post on Truth Social correcting the record by revealing he'd once eaten five.  The hot dog certainly can be political, David Cameron (b 1966; UK prime-minister 2010-2016 and another Old Etonian) attracting derision after being photographed eating his hot dog with knife and fork, something declared “out-of-touch” by the tabloid press which, while usually decrying the class system, doesn’t miss a chance to scorn toffs behaving too well or chavs too badly.  Cameron had other problems with takeaway snacks, caught being untruthful about his history of enjoying Cornish pasties, another working class favourite.  So it would seem for politicians, hot dogs are compulsory but only if eaten in acceptable chav style.

Barack Obama (b 1961; POTUS 2009-2017) and David Cameron eating hot dogs (both in chav-approved manner) at a college basketball game between Mississippi Valley State and Western Kentucky, Dayton Arena, Ohio, March 2012 (Western Kentucky won 59-56) (left) and UK Labour Party politician Ed Miliband (b 1969) enjoying what came to be known as "the notorious bacon sandwich moment", May 2014 (right).

Mr Miliband didn't attend Eton and some of his high school education was undertaken in the US so presumably he knows how to handle a hot dog.  If so, he has no excuse because a toastie is less challenging.  Mr Miliband's father was the sociologist Dr Ralph Miliband (1924–1994) who was among the most famous examples of that rare species, the “celebrity academic Marxist”.  People must make of that what they will when deciding whether, or to what extent, that might account for how his son came to handle a BCT (bacon & cheese toastie).  Curiously, Mr Cameron had some three years earlier undergone "hot dog eating training", supervised by President Obama, noted for his expertise (both theoretical and practical) in the subject.  So he knew how it should be done and immediately there was speculation he resorted to knife & fork to avoid any chance of something like Ed Miliband's "notorious bacon sandwich moment", something which had resulted in ridicule and a flood of memes after the photograph was published in Rupert Murdoch's (b 1931) tabloid The Sun on the eve of the 2015 general election.

Peter Dutton (b 1970; leader of the Liberal Party of Australia 2022-2025) enjoying a Dagwood Dog (in approved bogan manner), Brisbane Exhibition (Ekka), Australia, 2022 (left) and Lena Katina (b 1984) sucking on a popsicle (band-mate Julia Volkova (b 1985) looking sceptical) in a publicity shot for t.A.T.u., Moscow, 2002 (right).

On seeing the photo, Mr Dutton observed of such things: "There is no good angle" and one can see his point but he need not be apologetic about his technique because, as Ms Katina demonstrated, his method was immaculate.  Looking damnably like a neon-green hotdog, the shapes of the two snacks essentially are identical so they're eaten in a similar manner.  In Australia, it’s probably good for a politician to be known to eat Dagwood dogs but not necessarily be photographed mid-munch.  Interestingly, despite many opportunities, Mr Dutton has never denied being a Freemason.  Promoted as a pair of lesbian schoolgirls, t.A.T.u. (1999-2011) was a Russian pop cum electronica act, best remembered for being denied their deserved victory in the 2003 Eurovision Song Contest because of obvious irregularities in the voting; that the duo were neither lesbians nor schoolgirls was not the point.  Music critics and political scientists all agree Mr Putin (Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin; b 1952; president or prime minister of Russia since 1999) was probably a (secret) fan and it may be even comrade Stalin (1878-1953; Soviet leader 1924-1953) might have enjoyed the tunes; he liked music he could whistle and t.A.T.u.'s melodic qualities would have appealed.  On the basis of their political views, comrade Stalin might (while whistling along) have sent them to the Lubyanka (the old KGB headquarters on Moscow's Lubyanka Square) or the Gulag but never would he have accused them of formalism.  

Instinctively, Jacqui Lambie (b 1971, senator for Tasmania, 2014-2017 and since 2019) can sense the populist potential in an image and in 2019 posted an appropriately captioned one of her enjoying a Dagwood Dog at the Autumn Festival in Tasmania’s Derwent Valley.  Historically, in Tasmania, these were sold as “Pluto Pups” but “Dagwood Dog” is now commonly used.  As this illustrates, Mr Dutton's technique was correct so it's good Senator Lambie and Mr Dutton can agree on something.

The Dagwood dog was responsible for an amusing footnote in Australian legal history, a dispute from the 1949 Sydney Royal Easter Show played out in the Supreme Court of New South Wales in its equity jurisdiction, the press reports at the time noting one happy outcome being an “uninterrupted supply of hot dogs during the next few days.”  Hot dogs were one of the show’s big sellers but a dispute arose when allegations were made there had been breaches of letters patent for "improvements in sausage goods" giving the patentees (who sold “Pronto Pups”) "exclusive enjoyment and profit within Australia for sixteen years from September, 1946.  The plaintiffs (holders of the patent), sought an injunction against those who had begun selling “Dagwood Dogs" at the show, preventing them from vending or supplying any of the improvements in sausages described in the patent, the writ claiming Dagwood dogs embodied the patented improvements and that as a consequence of the infringement, the plaintiffs were suffering economic loss.  The trial judge, ordered a hearing for an assessment (a taking of accounts) of damages to be scheduled for the following April and issued a temporary order requiring the defendants undertook to pay into a trust account the sum of ½d (half a penny) for each for each axially penetrated sausage sold.

Crooked Hillary Clinton (b 1947; US secretary of state 2009-2013) enjoying pork hot dog during a campaign visit to the Iowa State Fair, August 2015.

The culinary delight has since been a fixture at city and country shows around the country although the name Pronto Pup didn’t survive; after the judgment in the Supreme Court it was replaced by “Pluto Pup” which also didn’t last although whether that was a consequence of a C&D (“cease & desist letter”) from Walt Disney’s lawyers isn’t known.  Anyway, since then it’s (mostly) been Dagwood dogs all the way except in South Australia (proud of their convict-free past, they often do things differently) where they’re knows as “Dippy Dogs” (an allusion to the generous dip in the tomato sauce pot) which may be of Canadian origin, although there, in at least some provinces, they’re sold as “Pogos”.

Robert Mitchum (1917–1997, right) paying attention to what Marilyn Monroe (1926–1962, left) is saying.

There are a number of “hot dog” stories about the film star Robert Mitchum, all told in the vein of him arriving at a Hollywood masquerade ball covered (to some extent) in tomato ketchup and, when asked to explain, replying: “I’m a hot dawg!”.  There were sanitized versions of the story (in which he was partially clothed) and other in which he was naked, the ketchup variously either coating his entire form or just his most sausage-like appendage.  The tale apparently first appeared in print in Confidential magazine (1952-1978) which, although a classic “scandal sheet”, was also a widely-read source of what would now be called “celebrity gossip” and was feared also by politicians and other public figures.  A kind of template for what would later be done on the internet, Confidential was published by Robert Harrison (1904–1978) who began his career as a respectable journalist before deciding sex, sensation & scandal was more lucrative.  While not always a NRS (normally reliable source) at least some of what appeared in Confidential was true.

Hotdog Stand color scheme, Microsoft Windows 3.1, 1992.

The industry legend is the “Hotdog Stand” color scheme Microsoft in 1992 shipped with Windows 3.1 was the winner of an informal contest between the designers to see who could concoct the worst possible combination.  Whether or not the competition was alcohol-fueled depends on which version of the story is told but all agree the winner based her entry on a vision of a hot dog, smothered in mustard and ketchup.  It’s doubtful many deliberately chose “Hotdog Stand” as their default scheme although there were certainly sysadmins (system administrators) who vengefully would impose it on annoying users, the more vindictive adding insult to injury by ensuring the user couldn’t change it back.  However, Hotdog Stand did briefly find a niche because it turned out to be the scheme which provided the best contrast on certain monochrome monitors, then still prevalent in corporations.  Windows 3.1 was the first version of the environment (it ran on the PC/MS/DR-DOS operating system) to attain wide corporate acceptance, whereas Windows 3.0 (1990) had tantalized while being still too unstable.  Windows 3.0 was unusual in being (apart from the short-lived 1.0) the only version of Windows released in a single version.  Although it ran in three modes: Real (on machines with only 640K RAM), Standard (requiring an 80286 CPU & 1 MB RAM) and Enhanced (requiring an 80386 CPU & 2 MB RAM), it shipped as a single product, the user with a command line switch (/r, /s or /e respectively) able to "force" the mode of choice, depending on the hardware in use.  Real mode didn't make it into Windows 3.1 and v3.11 ran exclusively as "Enhanced" so, in a sense, "Enhanced" had become standard.

A MCC member at Lords (left), wearing MCC blazer and tie and the Dege-Skinner’s MCC tie page (right). The merchandize is available from the club's official Savile Row tailor and proof of MCC membership is required for purchase.  According to the fashionistas, the trick with wearing stripes is that only the most admirably slender should don horizontal stripes while all others should stick to vertical because it's "slimming". 

Founded in 1787, the Marylebone Cricket Club (MCC) has since 1814 been based at Lord's Cricket Ground in St John's Wood, London.  The MCC owns Lord's and between 1787-1989, it was the world’s governing body of cricket, the role now discharged by the International Cricket Council (ICC), the successor body of the old Imperial Cricket Conference (1909-1963) although the MCC cast a long shadow, holding to this day the copyright to the game’s many rules.  The MCC’s distinctive colors have since the 1860s been red & yellow (replacing a more subtle sky blue), a combination known around the world as the “bacon & egg” and while caps and blazers are available, ties are the biggest seller.  Surprisingly for such a distinctive look, the origin remains a mystery and the two most popular theories are (1) they were the (horse) racing colors of the Duke of Richmond who was a prominent club member in its early days, (2) the combo was “borrowed” from the “wandering” club I Zingari (masculine plural of the Italian zingaro (Gypsy, Roma and used in the sense of "a person who likes to travel") which, founded in 1845, shared many members with the MCC and (3) they were adopted as a tribute to William Nicholson who contributed to the funds needed to purchasing the freehold of Lord’s Ground.  Mr Nicholson was an MCC Member and the owner of the Nicholson’s Gin Company, the colours of which were red and yellow so it was an early example of a type of corporate sponsorship, something now routine but then novel.  Established in 1736, the Nicholson brand was retired during the 1980s but revived by the family in 2016.  Historians of the game favour the Nicholson connection as the source of the MCC’s colors.

Zimbabwe's T20 cricket team, winners of the ICC's (International Cricket Council (named Imperial Cricket Conference 1909–1965 & International Cricket Conference 1965-1987)) inaugural Women's T20 cricket tournament at the 13^th African Games, Accra, Ghana, March 2024.

The colors of the Zimbabwe cricket kit have nothing to do with the Marylebone Cricket Club's “bacon & egg” look or any other institution in the former colonial oppressor.  They come from the national flag, chosen after independence in 1980, the red symbolizing the blood spilled during the country’s struggle for independence with the yellow (symbolic of “gold”) representing the abundant mineral wealth and natural resources beneath the soil.  The crest of Zimbabwe Cricket features the iconic Great Zimbabwe Bird in yellow on a red star. 

2016 Maserati GranTurismo MC. 

Microsoft's Hotdog Stand scheme didn’t survive the August 1995 transition to Windows 95 but a quarter of a century on, someone may have felt nostalgic because a buyer of a 2016 Maserati GranTurismo MC configured their car in bright yellow (Giallo Granturismo) over leather trim in red (Rosso Corallo).  As eye-catching in 2016 as Microsoft's Hotdog Stand had been in 1992, the Maserati’s recommended retail price was US$163,520.  Displayed first at the 2007 Geneva Motor Show, the GranTurismo (Tipo M145) remained in production until 2019, the MC Sport Line offered between 2012-2019; it's not known how many buyers chose this color combination.  The OEM (Original Equipment Manufacturer) wheels were all-black but on this MC were replaced with two-tone 21 & 22 inch Forgiato S201 ECL units in black and yellow on which were mounted Pirelli P Zero tyres (255/30-21 front & 315/25-22 rear).  Finishing the wheels in red and yellow might nicely have augmented the hot dog vibe but between the spokes Maserati's red brake calipers can be seen.  For the right buyer, this was the perfect package.

Juan Manuel Fangio, Maserati 250F, German Grand Prix, Nürburgring, August, 1957.

It’s drawing a long bow but the vivid combo may have be picked as a tribute to the Maserati 250F with which Juan Manuel Fangio (1911–1995) won the 1957 German Grand Prix at the Nürburgring, an epic drive and his most famous.  Fangio was Scuderia Alfieri Maserati’s team leader and a splash of yellow was added to the nosecone of his 250F so easily it could be identified, the color chosen because it was one of the two allocated to his native Argentina.  The 250Fs of the other team members also had nosecones painted in accordance with the original international auto racing colours standardized early in the century, American Harry Schell (1921–1960) in white and Frenchman Jean Behra (1921–1959), blue, all atop the factory’s traditional Italian red.

2022 Dodge Challenger SRT Hellcat Redeye Widebody Jailbreak in Go Mango with satin black accents over black Laguna leather and Alcantara upholstery.  Because of the design of the front splitter, this model was supplied ex-factory with the one-piece yellow "underwire". 

Unexpectedly, during the 2010s, "underwire" entered the lexicon of automotive slang when it was used to describe a plastic part fitted temporarily as a protective piece.  The yellow plastic fitting (pictured above on the leading edge of the Challenger's splitter) was called a "splitter guard" which was unimaginative but the factory didn't envisage them as consumer items and the term was merely explanatory for the information of those preparing cars for sale.  Installed to prevent damage during shipping, it was part of dealer preparation instructions to remove the pieces but leaving them attached became a cult and some cars were even retro-fitted.  An element in that was the "end of an era" vibe and large number of the vehicles in Dodge's "Last Call" runs (of which there were many) were purchased as investments to be stored away for the day when V8s are no longer produced and collectors will be anxious to pay much for the way things used to be done.  How well that will work out remains to be seen but with the "Last Call" runs typically in batches of more than 3000, most of them weren't, in collectable terms, especially rare.  

The text: "TO BE REMOVED BY DEALER" was molded into some of the splitter guards but after the things picked up their cult following, dealers began checking first with customers.  

Dealers cautioned against the trend, noting the pieces weren't specifically molded to ensure a perfect fit so dirt and moisture were prone to being trapped in the gaps and this could scuff the paint.  They were known also as "damage guards" and "scuff guards" but more imaginative souls dubbed them the "underwire" while serious students of such things suggested a better simile might have been "pastie", while acknowledging Chrysler followed the lead of the underwear manufacturers in having available both single and two-piece "underwires" although this was coincidental and deterministic, dictated by the splitter design.  Women not infrequently extract from bras underwires which have “poked through”, giving the wearer a painful jab in a soft, fleshy spot; although the tips usually are plastic-coated it’s still something of a point.  They also present a danger to machinery.  As bras age, stitching can be loosened to the extent that during washing cycles, underwires can separate from the garment and, because the drums in washing machines have many small holes, can end up in the mechanism including becoming entangled with moving parts.  For that reason, the recommendation is bras be laundered in a “bra bag”; while that affords some protection to the bra, it provides much to the machinery.  Whether on splitters they were kept or discarded might have seemed an improbable subject for dispute but with cars, men always find a reason to argue about something.  Although probably it would have preferred to discuss horsepower, superchargers and such, Chrysler noted the cultural phenomenon and, while obviously reluctant to upset either faction, did issue a statement to a magazine which had requested comment:

"The splitter guards on Dodge Charger and Challenger have taken on a life of their own. They originally made their debut in the 2015 model year to protect the performance fascias on SRT models during shipment from the manufacturing facility to the dealer, and, yes, they are designed to be removed before delivery.  But today, they have their own Facebook page, and many of our performance enthusiasts have active debates on whether to keep or remove them. Some owners say they are even selling them in the aftermarket.  Obviously, they weren't part of the original design, so we started with yellow guards and shifted to pink, but they are still so popular that we may shift them yet again to black. Wherever we land, this is another example of how our customers are passionate about every part of their Dodge muscle cars."

The Auto Sputnik

Italian and Soviet design sensibilities, circa 1958: Auto Sputnik, Rome, 1958, colorized (left) and 1958 Soviet UAZ-450 (right).  Mechanically somewhat updated (though stylistically, not by much) , the UAZ is still being made and is believed to be the oldest vehicle design still in series production, the blueprints delivered to the factory in 1957.

Built on the versatile platform of the Fiat 600 Multipla (1956–1967) Auto Sputnik (Sputnik-car) was built for the PCI (Partito Comunista Italiano, the Communist Party of Italy, 1921-1991) as a propaganda vehicle to travel around the land in the run-up to the 1958 general election.  Centre of attention was a model of Sputnik 1, the first artificial Earth satellite, launched by the Soviet Union on 4 October, 1957, an event which had shocked many in the West because it seemed to illustrate how much more advanced was Soviet science compared to that in the West.  What it heightened was the fear the communist "planned economy" was proving more efficient in producing advanced technology while in the West excessive resources were being absorbed by things like annual changes to the styling of washing machines or making the tailfins on cars rise higher.  That feeling rippled around the US Congress, causing great concern although the scientific and military establishment, better acquainted with relative industrial capabilities, were more sanguine.  Politicians however find it often more rewarding to respond to perceptions rather than reality and it was the launch of Sputnik which triggered the “space race”, the first round of which culminated in the US manned landing on the Moon in 1969.

Italian comrades admiring the Auto Sputnik, Rome, 1958.

Although just by achieving orbit Sputnik 1 was a landmark in space flight, as it circled the Earth every 96 minutes, despite much wild speculation, all the 580 mm (23 inch) wide metal sphere did was transmit “beeps” which could be received by ground-based radios but the PCI’s model on the Auto Sputnik was, in a sense, more ambitious because it included an integrated loudspeaker for broadcasting campaign messages (ie communist propaganda).  Having the Sputniks to use as propaganda tools was certainly a tribute to Soviet design prowess and industrial capacity but it was good that for Auto Sputnik the PCI turned to Italian rather than Soviet coach-builders.  There was at the time something in the souls of Italian designers which stopped them drawing an ugly line (that later would change) so the Auto Sputnik, despite its utilitarian purpose, was a stylish piece of aviation-influenced mid-century modernism, characterized by fuselage-like flanks with a sensuously shaped Perspex cockpit atop.  In a nice touch, a dog (various real beasts or stuffed toys appearing) was also carried, a tribute to Laika, the “Soviet space dog” who was the first animal to orbit the planet when Sputnik 2 flew into low orbit on 3 November 1957.  The  Perspex windows on the model of Sputnik certainly weren’t on the original sphere and were installed just so the dog could be seen and even that was an attempt to manipulate voters through “associative cognition”, people trusting dogs in a way they don't trust politicians.  Unfortunately for Laika, the technology of the era precluded a return-flight and, some hours into the mission, she died of hyperthermia.  The eye-catching design may be compared with what can be imagined had a Russian contractor been granted the commission.  What would have been delivered from behind the Iron Curtain would have been heavy, robust (if not especially well-finished) and “done the job” but it would not have been stylish.  For that, it was best to get an Italian and in the 1960s, the UK industry would do exactly that, Michelotti among several doing good business there.

Flag of the Italian Communist Party (hammer & sickle in yellow on red background, left) and the highly regarded “Italian Hot Dogs” sold at Jimmy Buff's.

No color images of the Auto Sputnik seem to exist but one monochrome photograph has been colorized, the software confirming it was finished in red & yellow.  These were the colors of the PCI’s flag so the choice had nothing to do with the ketchup and mustard of the “Italian Hot Dog”, the invention of which is credited to Jimmy “Buff” Racioppi, founder of Jimmy Buff's in Newark, New Jersey where the first “Italian Hot Dog” was sold in 1932.

The text on the vehicle: "VOTA COMUNISTA", translates as “Vote Communist” and the 1958 election was unexpectedly difficult for the party because there had been schisms and defections after (1) the Red Army's crushing the 1956 Hungarian uprising (tellingly, the Kremlin made no attempt to augment their forces with troops from other Warsaw Pact signatories) and (2) comrade Nikita Khrushchev’s (1894–1971; Soviet leader 1953-1964) “secret” speech in February that year denouncing the excesses of comrade Stalin (1878-1953; Soviet leader 1924-1953).  Still, the party maintained its support, gaining 22.7% of the vote against the 22.6% received in 1953, the loss of three seats (from 143 to 140) the consequence of electoral redistributions and some changes in the allocation of seats between the various mechanisms.  With that, the PCI remained the country’s second-largest party in Italy although the Democrazia Cristiana (DC, the Christian Democrats) remained dominant and the communists still were excluded from government.  Essentially then, the 1958 election maintained the “status quo” but what had changed since the late 1940s was that agents of the US government (not all of whom were on the payroll of the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency)) no longer wandered cities and the countryside with the suitcases of US dollars thought (correctly) to be the most useful accessory when seeking to influence elections.  When Washington complains about the CCP (Chinese Communist Party) and others using this method or that to try to “influence” elections in the US, they know what they’re talking about; while the tactics of the influencers have changed, the strategy remains the same.

BMW's venture into the "hotdog look", the K1.  The factory would preferred those making comparisons to note the emulation of the colors of the German flag. 

Between 1988–1993, BMW produced 6,921 K1s.  It was a modest volume and lifespan but the appearance and specification were quite a departure for the company which for sixty-odd years had built its reputation with air-cooled flat twins, packaged in designs which while functionally efficient offered few concessions to fashion.  That began to change in 1973 when the R90S appeared with a small bikini fairing in the style then favored by the “café racer” set but the rest of the machine remained in the sober Teutonic tradition, finished in a conservative silver (a more exuberant “Daytona Orange” would later be offered).  The fairings grew in size in subsequent models but never before the K1 did the factory produce anything so enveloping as was first seen at the 1988 Cologne Show, the effect heighted by the bold graphics and the choice of color schemes being blue & yellow or a hotdog-like red & yellow.  Inevitably, the latter's eye-catching combo picked up the nickname Ketchup und Senf (Ketchup and Mustard) but on BMW’s color chart they were listed as Marakeschrot (Marrakesh Red, code 222) and Ginstergelb (Broom Yellow, code 230).  The “broom” referenced is the shrub plant (related and visually similar to gorse) with distinctive, bright yellow flowers, not the device used for sweeping.  The look attracted almost as much comment as the mechanical specification which used an in-line four cylinder, 987 cm³ (60 cubic inch) liquid-cooled engine, mounted in an unusual longitudinal arrangement with the crankshaft to the right, something which delivered a low centre of gravity and contributed to the drag coefficient (CD) of .34 (with rider prone).  That contributed to a well-polished (it does make a difference) K1 with the correct tyre pressures being able to achieve 150 mph (241 km/h), a reasonable achievement for a 100 HP machine with a hefty (dry) weight of 259 kg (571 lb) although it was never such a happy experience at lower speeds, the long wheelbase and bodywork combining to created a 6.7 metre (22 foot) turning circle.  It was at its best on the move.

Restrained by comparison: the original alternative to the hotdog, in Laguna-Blue Metallic (code 233) & Broom Yellow.

The engineering was innovative and the K1 garnered many awards but after some initial enthusiasm sales waned and in 1991 the color scheme was not so much toned-down as re-toned, a more Germanic look (black metallic with silver wheels) offered which was less distinctive but also less controversial.  That solved one aesthetic challenge but others were more fundamental, the thing too big and heavy to be a “sports bike” in the accepted sense and all that fibreglass meant it could get very hot for both components and rider, a problem the factory, with some improvised engineering, ameliorated but never wholly solved.  What couldn’t be fixed was the lack of power, BMW at the time committed to the voluntary 100 HP (75 kW) limit for motorcycles sold in Germany and while the industry leading aerodynamics made the machine a creditable high-speed cruiser, as a “super-bike” in the manner of the Japanese and Italian machines, it simply wasn’t competitive; fifty years on, at least on two wheels, power dynamics within the Axis had shifted south and east.

1992 BMW K1 Royal-Blue metallic (code 270) & Silver (code 131).  The Royal Blue & Silver combination was perhaps the most pleasing but by the time it was made available, K1 production had slowed and it appeared on only a reputed 100 of the 296 built in 1992.

Further limiting the appeal, K1s produced for the important US market were detuned to 95 HP, noise and exhaust emissions cited as the reasons.  That reduced the top-speed to 143 mph (230 km/h) which wasn’t often experienced in US conditions but the detuning also further stunted acceleration which, compared with the more powerful competition, was anyway at the bottom of the class.  As on the Autobahns, the US-delivered K1s were effortless cruisers and stable on fast curves but at a time when Japanese “sports bikes” were both cheaper and more powerful (Suzuki rated at 125 HP, Honda at 132, Yamaha at 145 and Kawasaki at 147), BMW dealers needed to find “niche market buyers” and those customers were not numerous.  That US K1s were fitted as standard with das Antiblockiersystem (ABS, anti-lock brakes by FAG Kugelfischer/Hella which was primitive because of the computer technology of the era (in 1989 Intel’s biggest selling PC CPU was the 16-bit 80286) but effective) optional in other places was innovative but not as attractive to buyers as more power.  In Germany, where BMW had obvious local advantages and other manufacturers also complied with the 100 HP limit, the differences were less obvious but the factory never released a more powerful K1 for international sales.  One amusing aspect to the K1 being notoriously prone to heat-build-up within the enveloping faring was BMW did understand the machines might be ridden in very cold weather and thoughtfully included a Powerlet-style port for those occasions when even engine heat trapped in the fairing wasn’t enough to protect a rider from the cold.  Into the port could be plugged heated riding suits, a welcome feature still not seen on many.   

Chart of the standard semaphore alphabet (top left), a pair of semaphore flags (bottom left) and Lindsay Lohan practicing her semaphore signaling (just in case the need arises and this is the letter “U”), 32^nd birthday party, Mykonos, Greece, July, 2018 (right).

Semaphore flags are not always red and yellow, but the colors are close to a universal standard, especially in naval and international signalling.  There was no intrinsic meaning denoted by the use of red 7 yellow, the hues chosen for their contrast and visual clarity, something important in maritime environments or other outdoor locations when light could often be less than ideal although importantly, the contrast was sustained even in bright sunshine.

L-I-N-D-S-A-Y-space-L-O-H-A-N spelled-out in ICS (International Code of Signals) semaphore.  One cannot predict when this knowledge will come in handy.

Because semaphore often was used for ship-to-to ship signalling, the colors had to be not only easily distinguishable at a distance but not be subject to “melting” or “blending”, a critical factor when used on moving vessels in often pitching conditions, the operator’s moving arms adding to the difficulties.  In naval and maritime semaphore systems, the ICS (International Code of Signals) standardized full-solid red and yellow for the flags but variants do exist (red, white, blue & black seem popular) and these can be created for specific conditions, for a particular cultural context or even as promotional items.

Green & yellow alternatives: Saint Patrick's Day hot dog (left) and vegan hotdog (right). 

Although the ketchup and mustard combination is most associated with the hot dog, not all hot dogs are in a theme of red & yellow, the most common alternative formations being green & yellow.  Some of these are seasonal and created for the cultural & religious holiday celebrated as Lá Fhéile Pádraig (literally “the Day of the Festival of Patrick” and often described as the “Feast of Saint Patrick”) which marks the death of Saint Patrick (circa 385–circa 461), the foremost patron saint of Ireland and missionary who converted the Island from paganism to Christianity.  Others are usually vegetarian or vegan hot dogs and green components, while not essential, often are added as a form of virtue-signaling. 

1981 Chevrolet Corvette: In 1981, the L81 version of the 350 cubic inch (5.7 litre) small block V8 was the sole available powerplant, rated at 190 HP (horsepower) in all 50 states. 

The 2016 Maserati GranTurismo was certainly distinctive but strange color-combos are sometimes seen although in recent decades, factories have restricted not only the ranges offered but also the way they can be combined.  The 1981 Chevrolet Corvette (above) definitely didn’t leave the assembly line in yellow & green; that season, yellow (code 52) was available but there was no green on the color chart and while two-tone paint was a US$399.00 option, the only choices were Silver/Dark Blue (code 33/38); Silver/Charcoal (code 33/39); Beige/Dark Bronze (code 50/74) & Autumn Red/Dark Claret (code 80/98).  After taking in the effect of the yellow/green combo, the camel leather trim (code 64C/642) seems anti-climatic.

2025 John Deere 9900 Self-Propelled Forage Harvester: 956 HP.

Modern harvesters are machines of extraordinary efficiency, one able in an hour to reap more than what would once have taken a large team of workers more than a day.  Mechanized harvesters were an early example of the way technology displaces labor at scale and because historically women were always a significant part of the harvesting workforce, they were at least as affected as men.  The development meant one machine operator and his (and they were almost exclusively men) machine could replace even dozens of workers, something which profoundly changed rural economies, the participation of the workforce engaged in agriculture and triggered the re-distribution of the population to urban settlements.  Artificial intelligence (AI) is the latest innovation in technology applied to agriculture as just a one operator + machine combo replaced dozens of workers, multiple machines now go about harvesting with an AI bot handling the control and a dozen or more of these machines can be under the supervision of a single individual sitting somewhere on the planet, not so much controlling the things and monitoring for errors and problems.  Removing the on-site human involvement means it becomes possible to harvest (or otherwise work the fields) 24/7/365 without concerns about intrusions like light, the weather or toilet breaks.  Of course people remain involved to do tasks such as repairs, refueling and such but AI taking over many of these roles may be only a matter of time.

1936 John Deere Model B Row Crop Tractor (“Unstyled”).

The concept known to motorcyclists as the “naked” (a bike without fairings so the engine, frame and exhaust system are exposed) existed also in agricultural machinery, all of which presumably began in a “naked” form with protective housings added later.  As such equipment became big business in commerce, decorative embellishments would have been the last appendages to appear.  Until the 1939 model-cycle, John Deere’s (JD) row crop tractors were “naked” in execution with the steering post, radiator and most of the engine exposed, the wheels often with spokes running from hub to rim.  However, in 1938, JD hired the industrial designer Henry Dreyfuss (1904-1972) and he created the shapes of the sheet metal which was added to cover many of the exposed areas, including the radiator, the new grill unmistakably from the art deco era and perhaps influenced by the memorable “coffin-nosed” Cords (810-812, 1936-1937).  Mr Dreyfuss’s distinctive radiator cowling was for generations a signature element of many of JD’s Tractors.

1956 John Deere Model 60 Row Crop Tractor (“Styled”).

At the time, such ventures were thought “styling” rather than “designing” so the new JD ranges came to be dubbed the “Styled” and the predecessors retrospective this became the “Unstyled” and also a marker of the new was the use of solid steel wheels to replace the spoke units.  Although heavier and using more steel, the solid wheels were cheaper to produce because they eliminated the use of much labor.  JD’s switch to “Styled” versions was phased in over several years with the models “D” & “G” being the last to appear in the original “naked” configuration.  JD and Mr Dreyfuss put effort and capital into the “Styled” project and as the company’s product line for decades indicated, they were well-pleased with the result and no doubt would not have predicted that early in the twenty-first century, with vintage tractors a collectable item (and definitely there are identifiable cults among the calling), there would be those who would take a 1942  “Styled” JD and lovingly transform it into an “Unstyled”.

Western Electric's original Trimline was available in 36 finishes (33 shades plus faux teak or walnut and the obviously daring “Transparent”) including JD’s signature green & yellow.  According to AT&T, the most popular colors for the original 210 Trimline phones were beige (home market) and black (corporations) but they were available also in Mustard (left) and Ketchup Red.  Now of course produced in the Far East, the style made a comback as a retro-item (centre) in a wide range of designer colors and is even sold in a hotdogesquecombo (right).

Although his name remains well-known in the field, Henry Dreyfuss is somewhat neglected in the public imagination although his breadth was remarkable, encompassing both industrial and consumer products ranging from vacuum cleaners, typewriters and alarm clocks to heavy locomotives, tractors and office buildings.  His most enduring contribution to daily American life was his involvement in the design of telephone handsets, his models for Western Electric serving as standard household and office fixtures between the 1940s and 1990s while the wall-mountable rotary-dial Trimline (1965) and twelve-digit touch-phone (1968) to this day retail a niche in the telco ecosystem.

Cheerleaders of the Oregon Ducks, the college football team of the University of Oregon.

Maybe the Corvette's repaint was ordered by a fan of John Deere’s highly regarded farm equipment because JD’s agricultural products are always finished in a two-tone yellow/green (their construction equipment being black & yellow).  For the 1981 Corvette, a single engine was offered in all 50 states, a 350 cubic inch (5.7 litre) small-block V8 designated L81 which was rated at the same 190 HP (142 kW) as the previous season’s base L48; no high-output version was now available but the L81 could be had with either a manual or automatic transmission (it would prove to be the last C3 Corvette offered with a manual).  Glumly though that drive-train might have been viewed by some who remembered the tyre-smoking machines of a decade-odd earlier, it would have pleased buyers in California because in 1980 their Corvettes received only the 305 cubic inch (5.0 litre) V8 found often in pick-up trucks, station wagons and other utilitarian devices; to them the L81 was an improvement and one which seemed to deliver more than the nominal 10 HP gain would have suggested.  The L81’s 190 HP certainly wouldn’t impress those in the market for John Deere’s 9900 Self-Propelled Forage Harvester, powered by a 1465 cubic inch (24 litre) Liebherr V12, rated at 956 HP (713 kW), the machine available only in the corporate two-tone yellow & green.  Like Corvettes (which have tended to be quite good at their intended purpose and pretty bad at just about everything else), harvesters are specific purpose machines; one which is a model of efficiency at gathering one crop will be hopelessly inept with another and in that they differ from the human workforce which is more adaptable.  However, where there is some similarity in the plants, it can be possible for the one basic machine to be multi-purpose, the role changed by swapping the attachable device which does the actual picking or gathering.

1955 Studebaker Speedster (of the 2,215 Speedsters, a solid 763 were finished in the eye-catching combination of Hialeah Green & Sun Valley Yellow, left) and some ingredients for chef Jennifer Segal's (b 1974) succotash in cast iron skillet while in the throes of preparation (right).  Ms Segal’s succotash may be the finest in the world.  While striking, the Studebaker's color combination was one of the more restrained offered that season, pink & metallic purple also available.

Lest anyone think a green and yellow Corvette is just a uniquely 1980s lapse of taste, in previous decades, in fashion and on the highways, things were often more colourful than the impression left by so much of the monochrome and sepia prevalent in the photographic record until later in the twentieth century.  With roots in a family business which in the late eighteenth century began building horse-drawn wagons, following a near-bankruptcy during the Great Depression (the corporation saved by the financial skills of Lehman Brothers (1850-2008)), Studebaker emerged from World War II (1939-1945) in good financial shape and was the first US auto-maker to release a genuinely new range of post-war models, the style of which would remain influential for a decade.  Unfortunately, for a variety of reasons, the company’s next twenty years were troubled and by the mid-1960s were out of the car business, something which at the time surprised few, the only curiosity being it “…took an unconscionable time a-dying”.

1955 Studebaker Speedster: The shade of the quilted leather was listed as Congo Ivory (although collectors seem to refer “pineapple yellow”) and the diamond motif was the theme for most of the interior fitting including the engine-turned aluminium facia panel which housed what by far the US industry’s most functional (if not most imaginative) gauge cluster.

There were though in those final years a few memorable flourishes, one of which was the 1955 Speedster, produced for just one season as a flagship.  It was a blinged-up version of the President State hardtop coupe, part of a range which at the time was praised for its Italianesque lines and had it be able to be sold at a more competitive price, it may have survived to remain longer in the catalogue.  In 1955, all Studebaker’s passenger vehicles benefited from a lavish (even by Detroit’s mid-1950s standards) application of chrome and the Speedster’s front bumper is strikingly similar in shape to the “rubber bumper” added in 1974 to the MGB (1962-1980) as a quick and dirty solution to meet US front-impact regulations; it’s doubtful British Leyland’s stylists were influenced by the sight of the Speedster.

1955 Studebaker President Speedster.

The West of the 1950s sometimes is described as a period of "dull conformity" and while in some aspects there's truth in that, as well as the occasionally bizarre styling motifs, there was a sense of exuberance in the two (and sometimes three) tone color schemes the US industry offered during those years.  For those who liked the car but found the more "adventurous" color combinations a bit much, the Speedster could also be ordered in black and white over beige and brown leather.  Studebaker used the President name (they also offered a "Dictator" until events in 1930s Europe made that a harder sell) for their most expensive models, the first three generations a range of sedans, coupes and roadsters produced between 1926-1942.  The name was revived in 1955 and used until 1958, the range this time encompassing two and four-door sedans & station wagons and two-door coupes and hardtops.  The last of the Packards (the much derided, so-called "Packardbakers" which had a brief, unsuccessful run between 1957-1958) were based on the Speedster, the most admired of the range.

1979 Rolls-Royce Silver Wraith II in Champagne & Highland Green over color-coordinated leather with piping.

Such was the American fondness for the “John Deere vibe” that at least one buyer ordered a Rolls-Royce in the yellow-green combo (Champagne & Highland Green on the R-R color chart).  Re-using the name from the saloon (1946-1958) which was the first post-war Rolls-Royce (and the last of its six-cylinder cars), the Silver Wraith II was a LWB (long-wheelbase) version of the Silver Shadow (1965-1980), the company’s first car to abandon the traditional chassis and use a unitary body.  Introduced in 1977 as a companion of the revised Silver Shadow II, the “LWB Silver Shadow” concept was not new because the factory had since 1967 built such things, the model added to the general production schedule in 1969.  The additional 4 inches (100 mm) in length was allocated wholly to the rear compartment so the legroom was greater although if the optional divider was fitted this was sacrificed to the structure and the usable space was the same as a Silver Shadow.  Between the two LWB models, the production breakdown was: Silver Shadow LWB (2,772; 1967-1977) & Silver Wraith II (2,136; 1977-1980).

Covering all color bases: Lindsay Lohan in pantsuit in a gallimaufry of colors from Law Roach’s (b 1978) Akris’ fall 2022 ready-to-wear collection.

The ensemble included a wide-lapelled jacket, turtleneck and boot cut pants fabricated in a green, yellow, red & orange Drei Teile print in an irregular geometric pattern, the distinctive look paired with a similarly eclectic combination of accessories, chunky gold hoop earrings, a crossbody Anouk envelope handbag, and Giuseppe Zanotti platform heels.  A tough crew, it can be hard to predict which way critics will jump but the collective reaction to this outfit was positive.

Rolls-Royce had before re-named what was essentially an existing model, the Corniche (1971-1995) a re-branding of the two-door (saloon (coupé) & DHC (drophead coupé, the factory later joining the rest of the planet and naming the convertibles)) versions of the Sliver Shadow which were between 1965-1971 built by MPW (Mulliner Park Ward) (the count: 571 Rolls-Royce saloons & 506 convertibles and 98 Bentley saloons & 41 convertibles).  The Everflex (an expensive, heavy-duty synthetic fabric also used in the folding soft-tops of some convertibles) covering on the Silver Wraith II’s roof was an aesthetic choice (the vinyl roof inexplicably popular in the era) and not a way of disguising seams in the metal.  Unlike some coach-builders (and even some major manufacturers) inclined to "paper over the cracks" with vinyl, Rolls-Royce did things to a higher standard.  Although by the 1970s vinyl and other plastics had appeared in their cars, neither word much appeared in their documents; instead Rolls-Royce "did" leather and Everflex. 

For avatars only: A cheerleader uniform “inspired” by that of the Green Bay Packers, modeled by an “ideal” cheerleader with emblematic pig-tails, Second Life marketplace.  A demo version is available prior to purchase.

If offered for sale in the US, this particular Silver Wraith II might appeal to supporters of sporting teams which use the green-yellow combo for the players' kit.  That includes the Green Bay Packers, a professional American football team based in Green Bay, Wisconsin, which compete in the National Football League (NFL) as a member of the National Football Conference's (NFC) North division.  Established in 1919, the Packers are the NFL's third-oldest franchise and are unusual to the point of uniqueness in being the only non-profit, community-owned major league professional sports team based in the US, holding the record for the most wins in NFL history.  There is also the Oregon Ducks, the University of Oregon's college football team, which competes at National Collegiate Athletic Association's (NCAA) Division I level in the Football Bowl Sub-division (FBS) and is a member of the Big Ten Conference (B1G).  Unfortunately, the team is no longer known as the Webfoots, the Ducks moniker adopted in the mid-1960s.  The green & yellow of the Ducks has some prominence in the sportswear market because of a close association with Oregon-based manufacturer Nike.

Joey Chestnut (b 1983) and Miki Sudo (b 1986) with the title belts awarded for their victories in the 2026 Nathan's Famous Fourth of July Hot Dog Eating Contest, Coney Island, Brooklyn, New York, 4 July, 2026.  Conducted under the auspices of US MLE (Major League Eating), the event is sanctioned by the IDOCE (International Federation of Competitive Eating).

A legendary figure in the niche sport of hot dog eating record-setting, Mr Chestnut’s victory in the annual contest was secured by him consuming 66 dogs and buns (within the 10 minute limit used since 2008), continuing his domination of the event, missing the title in 2024 only because his entry was not accepted due to a “sponsorship conflict”.  The 2026 title was his 18^th with a PB (personal best) of 76 hot dogs, set in 2021.  Such a winning streak is rare in competitive sport and was all the more remarkable because it’s an outdoor event and the temperature on Independence Day 2026 registered 98^o F (37^o C).  A multiple winner of the IFOCE's prestigious “Mustard Yellow Belt”, Mr Chestnut's career in his culinary vocation began in 2005 when, as a student, he won a deep-fried asparagus eating championship.  Curiously, the chestnut industry seems never to have organized a chestnut eating competition which seems a missed opportunity given the promotional opportunities were Mr Chestnut to be invited to complete.  Entrepreneurs seeking to fill this gap in the market should note the difference between edible chestnuts (Castanea genus) and the toxic toxic horse chestnuts (Aesculus genus, known informally as buckeyes), symptoms of having consumed the latter including severe abdominal pain, vomiting and throat irritations; toxicologists caution a massive intake of horse chestnuts (such as would be ingested in a chestnut eating competition) would potentially be fatal.  The women’s contest was held on the same day and that Ms Sudo won, enjoying 39 dogs and buns.  Her record is just as remarkable, having won each of the twelve contests she has entered since her first in 2014 (in 2021 she was unable to defend her title, being with child and thus wisely concluding she should not that year compete).  Despite the apparent linguistic implications, such contests are not examples of what economists call “conspicuous consumption” but that there are hot dog eating champions brings delight to some and despair to others, the latter doubtless also disturbed there is on one menu a US$5000 hamburger.

GWR world record hot dogs, the California Capitol City Dawg by Capitol Dawg (left) and the Juuni Ban by Tokyo Dog (right).

According to GWR (Guinness World Records), the planet’s most expensive hot dog was the US$169 creation sold on 23 February 2014 by Tokyo Dog (USA) in Seattle, Washington in the US.  Dubbed the “Juuni Ban”, the “footlong” (ie 12 inch (300 mm)) concoction contained smoked cheese bratwurst, butter Teriyaki grilled onions, Maitake mushrooms, Wagyu beef, foie gras, shaved black truffles, caviar and Japanese mayonnaise, presented on a brioche bun.  There have been reports of chefs who have made even more expensive hot dogs but under the GWR’s rules, to qualify, at least one hot dog had to be purchased in a “legitimate business transaction” and on that day in 2014, Tokyo Dog sold a presumably lucrative six, the impressive elasticity in the demand curve perhaps encouraged by the announcement profits would be donated to the American Red Cross rather than this being a display of conspicuous consumption.  The Juuni Ban’s price topped the record held by the previous winner, the “California Capitol City Dawg” which, priced at US$145.49, was in 2012 sold by Capitol Dawg in Sacramento, California.  A more modest “8-incher” (200 mm), it included French whole-grain mustard, garlic & herb mayonnaise, sautéed shallots, mixed baby greens, applewood and cherry-smoked, uncured bacon, Swedish moose cheese, chopped tomato, sweetened dried cranberries, a basil olive oil/cranberry-pear-coconut balsamic vinaigrette and fresh ground pepper, served on a custom-made herb focaccia roll toasted in white truffle butter.

The potential breakdown.  However good the product, both would have been cost-prohibitive if supplied in a hot dog eating contest. 

However tasty, neither of these culinary delights would have been considered by the organizers of the annual hot dog eating contest because, in 2022, to feed the two winners alone could have cost more than US$17,000 even assuming the suppliers maintained their prices despite inflation and other pressures.  Of course, a “volume discount” would probably have been available (such as offered by Boeing & Airbus to airlines and even Rolls-Royce has a “specific unit pricing” programme “by negotiation”) but it’s doubtful either Tokyo Dog or Capitol Dawg would have been able to reduce the unit cost to a level making viable their use in hot dog eating contests.  The competitors doubtlessly would have noticed some difference in taste but as a general principle, while there’s likely to be an obvious difference in the quality of a US$3.50 hot dog compared with one costing US$10, between a US$149 and US$169 item, it’s more about variations on the theme.

Very hot dogs: Thịt chó (dog meat) in a street-food stall in Vietnam.

In Vietnam, dog meat consumption is a regional culinary practice most seen in the country’s northern regions.  The most popular form of preparation is believed to be grilling with the meat typically marinated with a combination of fermented shrimp paste, galangal (a type of ginger), turmeric, and rice vinegar.  When prepared as street food, the chopped sections are roasted over an open charcoal fire, a process that caramelizes the fats and marinades, lending exterior a glazed, crispy texture. Grilled dog meat often is served alongside dồi nướng (dog sausage) and vendors take great care in the selection of herbs used, meaning flavours can vary between sweet and savory, the flesh succulent and often described as a cross between beef and pork.  In the West, folk often are quick to condemn those eating creatures like cats and dogs but give little thought to the offence they might be causing by eating animals revered by others.  The list of animals one in the West is able to mistreat (most fish, rodents & insects, some reptiles etc) is quite long and there’s also a number available for certain purposes (scientific & industrial research) involving suffering.

Fresh meat being delivered.  This method is not greatly different to the way in the West many types of live animals are delivered to slaughterhouses (abattoirs).

Historically, east of Suez, consuming dog meat was not uncommon and in some cultures it was a significant contribution to regional protein intake (France not outlawing it until early in the twentieth century) while in other places it was either unlawful or a taboo.  Carnivorism (the practice of eating meat) is an almost universal human practice but what is acceptable varies between cultures.  Some foods are proscribed (such as shellfish or pig-meat) and while it’s clear the origin of these bans was as a kind of “public heath” measure (the rules created in hot climates in the pre-refrigeration age), the observance became a pillar of religious observance.  Sometimes, a similar rule seems originally to have had an economic imperative such as the Hindu restriction on the killing of cattle for consumption, thus the phrase “sacred cow”, the original rationale being the calculation the live beasts made an economic contribution which much outweighed their utility as a protein source.  So, what is deemed acceptable and not is a cultural construct and that varies from place-to-place, the Western aversion to eating cats & dogs attributable to the sentimental view of them that has evolved because of the role for millennia as domestic pets.  Over history, it’s likely every animal in the world has at some point been used as a food source, some an acquired taste such as the “deep fried tarantula” which, long a tasty snack in parts of Cambodia, became a novelty item in Cambodian restaurants in the West.

Yulin Lychee and Dog Meat Festival.

In the Far East, over the last decade, the trend has tended towards restricting or abolishing the commercial dog meat trade although between jurisdictions, there was much variation in the approach: (1) In Vietnam there has never been a ban but researchers say consumption is declining (sharply in urban areas) and some cities discourage it by “nudges” (delaying issuing licences for restaurants, inspectors finding violations of health rules etc).  (2) In the Philippines, the dog meat trade mostly is now unlawful (because of contravention of animal welfare laws) but there are exceptions for “traditional cultural practices”; again, among younger, urban populations, consumption has fallen.  (3) Indonesia has imposed no national ban but some cities and provinces have prohibited the trade (though enforcement is said to be “patchy”).  In the PRC (People’s Republic of China, the old “Red China”), there is no national ban but sales most large cities have prohibited consumption and in rural areas it’s believed the practice is for many reason “tolerated by being ignored”.  An example of that is the annual, ten day 狗肉节 (Dog Meat Festival), publicized (disapprovingly) in the West as the Yulin Lychee and Dog Meat Festival.  Held in Yulin, Guangxi, during the summer solstice (21-30 June), although the Ministry of Agriculture removed dogs from the official list of livestock intended for food production (describing them instead as “companion animals”). the CCP's (Chinese Communist Party) thinking seems to be there are already enough public protests about this & that and cracking down on the anyway declining numbers of dog meat munchers in Yulin would likely create more problems than it solves.

Street display of dog meat hanging on meat hooks, Vietnam.  Without the emotional attachment felt for “man’s best friend”, dog meat, like, rabbit, chicken etc, is just another protein source.

(4) The renegade province of Taiwan in 2017 imposed a complete ban on the trade in dogs & cats for human consumption and the black market is believed to be “tiny”.  (5) In Hong Kong, although the British colonial authorities for decades took little interest in the matter, in the post-war years, pressure from the UK (apparently concerned members of the public rather than the authorities) grew and by the early 1960s the trade had been driven underground; it’s now close to extinct.  (6) In the RoK (Republic of Korea, South Korea), dog meat was long a staple protein but as prosperity grew, consumption fell and in 2024, the National Assembly prohibited breeding, slaughtering, distribution or selling dogs for meat with the restrictions phased in, the three-year transition period ending in 2027 when the laws will become “fully enforceable in 2027”.  Because it was a sizeable industry, the government is providing compensation and assistance for farmers and restaurant owners compelled to abandon the business and the approach is to target the commercial industry rather than criminalizing the act of eating dog meat.  There is said to be in government a tacit admission consumption may on a small scale continue in rural areas but it’s believed it was become vanishingly small as those consumer age and die.  What happens in the DPRK (Democratic Republic of Korea, North Korea) isn’t known but given the sometimes chronic shortage of protein in rural areas, it should be assumed dog meat may there remain part of the diet.

Insider's quick summary of the hot dog production process. 

Otto von Bismarck (1815-1989; chancellor of the German Empire 1871-1890) famously observed that people "shouldn't see how laws or sausages are made".  The processes (now effectively institutionalized) which produce legislation are now more disturbing even than in the iron chancellor's gut-wrenching times but sausage production has (generally) become more hygienic.